Hi Sephirah

You said:

Quote from: Sephirah on January 04, 2025, 03:21:19 PMYeah I would totally play with your hair. <3 You'd have pigtails before you could say "WTF are you doing, girl!?" Hugely anime pigtails.

Mine is down to my... ahem... posterior? Yeah that's the ladylike word for it. Takes me a good 45 minutes to apply all the "Stuff" to it, and get it just so. But it's like my one crowning achievement, so it's worth it! That and pink hair dye, lol.

You are so on girl!  I would so love for you to do; 'Half Up Half Down', 'Fish Braid' or 'French Braid Pigtails' on Me!


Is this you!?


This is so me!

My hair barely reaches my waist, I did not inherit by mum's long hair genes.  After swimming I rinse my hair out.  Then after I have changed into some day clothes and packed my swimming bag away I apply a little hair conditioner, then comb through and let it hang out to dry, oh wash with shampoo once a week.  So cool.

Best Wishes Always
Sarah B
Global Moderator
@Sephirah

The third one of those pics. That's totally you, K <3 With your smile... it would be amazing.

That isn't me, no hahahahaha.

My hair is more this colour:

Hi Sephirah

Yeah, you are right twin French Braid Pigtails.

Pink and Black?  I assume you have streaks of pink throughout your hair. 

I once had 3 colours put through my hair.  Maybe I will do it again soon, too many greys these days.

Hugs
Sarah B
@Sephirah

Quote from: Sarah B on January 05, 2025, 05:37:57 PMHi Sephirah

Yeah, you are right twin French Braid Pigtails.

Pink and Black?  I assume you have streaks of pink throughout your hair. 

I once had 3 colours put through my hair.  Maybe I will do it again soon, too many greys these days.

Hugs
Sarah B
@Sephirah

I do yes. I have pink highlights. My hair is the only thing really I have control over these days so I'm like "Time to pull out all the stops!". I don't care what anyone thinks. I'm way... WAY past caring. It makes me happy. And that's the whole point of life. I can't transition but I will damn well have pink and black hair! lol. Surprisingly, it's the thing people compliment me on most haha.

Hi Everyone

In a previous post I mentioned four scenarios and they were:

• Transgender and experiences gender dysphoria
• Transgender and does not experience gender dysphoria
• Not transgender and experiences gender dysphoria
• Not transgender and does not experience gender dysphoria (This is me)

It was mentioned that:

If you have gender dysphoria, then by definition, you are transgender.

and

But #3 above is not possible. You cannot have gender dysphoria and not be transgender.

This led me to outline a paper that disagrees with the two statements made by Lori.  I acknowledge that the term 'transgender' is widely used to describe individuals whose gender identity differs from their sex assigned at birth.  However, Lori, I respectfully disagree with the assertion that Scenario 3, where someone experiences gender dysphoria (GD) but does not identify as transgender, is impossible.

The following is that paper.

---

Introduction

This paper explores the possibility of Scenario 3, where individuals experience gender dysphoria (GD) without identifying as transgender. Through historical examples, medical frameworks, and societal perspectives, it highlights the differences between identity labels and clinical conditions. By examining key concepts and case studies, the discussion aims to foster a deeper understanding of gender diversity while emphasizing personal autonomy and the importance of evolving language in gender discourse.

Transgender as a Label
The term "transgender" is a label used to describe individuals whose gender identity differs from the sex they were assigned at birth.  It is not a medical condition but rather a self defined term reflecting personal and social understanding of gender identity [1][3].

The term "transgender" emerged in the mid 20th century and gained prominence in the 1990s as a broad, inclusive label for diverse gender experiences.  According to Stryker (2008), it evolved as a political and social term to unify various gender identities under one umbrella [2].  Historical and cultural shifts significantly influenced the term's adoption, broadening its application over time to encompass diverse gender experiences.

However, during the 1970s and 1980s, "transgender" was not in widespread use and notable individuals like Renée Richards and Jan Morris, did not describe their experiences using this label [5][6].  Instead, they framed their actions as personal and medical rather than aligning with emerging identity based terms.

The term 'transgender' has faced criticisms as a universal descriptor due to its limitations. Valentine (2007) argues that the term's broadness and inconsistencies often fail to capture the nuanced experiences of those it seeks to describe. [6]  Similarly, Stryker (2008) emphasizes that 'transgender' has evolved more as a political and social category than a universal or definitive term for all individuals experiencing gender incongruence [2].

This diversity of perspectives underscores that rejecting the label "transgender" does not invalidate someone's experiences of GD or GID.  It highlights the need for autonomy in navigating identity labels and addressing medical or psychological experiences.

Gender Dysphoria as a Medical Condition
Gender Dysphoria is a clinical diagnosis defined by psychological distress resulting from a mismatch between one's gender identity and biological sex.  It is recognized as a medical condition in frameworks such as the DSM-5 and the WPATH Standards of Care [1][3].

Earlier frameworks, such as the DSM-IV, referred to Gender Identity Disorder (GID), emphasizing the clinical aspects of distress without associating it with identity labels.  The DSM-5 later transitioned to GD, aiming to reduce stigma while maintaining medical recognition of distress [3].

The medicalization of GD underscores its distinction from labels like "transgender." GD focuses on the psychological and emotional impacts of gender incongruence, while "transgender" remains a self defined term reflecting personal identity and social understanding [1][4].

Did Renée Richards and Jan Morris experience GD or GID?
Renée Richards and Jan Morris underwent gender affirming surgeries in 1975 and 1972, respectively, during a time when terms like "gender dysphoria" (GD) and "transgender" were not in widespread use. The clinical term Gender Identity Disorder (GID) first appeared in the DSM-III in 1980, later replaced by Gender Dysphoria (GD) in the DSM-5 in 2013 to reduce stigma while maintaining medical recognition.

Both Richards and Morris detailed their experiences in autobiographical books, with Richards publishing Second Serve in 1983 and Morris publishing Conundrum in 1974, providing personal insights into their journeys outside the frameworks commonly used today.  Neither explicitly described their experiences as GD or Gender Identity Disorder (GID), a diagnosis used in earlier frameworks

Instead, both framed their journeys as deeply personal and medical, focusing on alignment rather than distress.  Their narratives predate and exist outside modern frameworks of GD, demonstrating how personal identity and medical action can occur independently of such terminology.

Richards and Morris both emphasized authenticity over labels.  Renée Richards often described her surgery as a necessary medical correction rather than a matter of identity.  Similarly, Jan Morris focused on achieving personal completeness, framing her experience as one of self realization rather than psychological distress.

While Richards and Morris did not explicitly diagnose themselves with GD or GID, terminology that was not in common use during their lifetimes, their narratives provide compelling evidence of distress and symptoms consistent with these conditions as they are understood today.

Proving Scenario 3 is Possible
Scenario 3 proposes that someone can experience GD without identifying as transgender.  This is entirely plausible for several reasons:

• Historical Evidence Supports Distinctions Between Identity and Dysphoria:  Individuals like Richards and Morris pursued medical alignment without aligning with modern transgender identity frameworks.  Their personal narratives demonstrate that medical or psychological experiences are not inherently tied to identity labels [2][5][6].
  
  
• GD and Identity Labels Are Separate:  GD is defined by psychological distress from gender incongruence and is recognized as a medical condition.  Identifying as transgender is a personal and social decision.  The two are not dependent on each other [1][3].
  
  
• Cultural and Generational Influences on Identity Terms:  In earlier decades, many individuals who addressed gender incongruence did not use the term "transgender." Cultural, historical and personal factors significantly influence whether someone embraces such labels [4][5].
  
  
• Privacy and Autonomy Over Labels:  Not everyone experiencing GD wants to associate with identity based terminology.  Some choose medical or personal paths without engaging with broader identity categories associated with transgender individuals. [6]

Counterarguments
It can be argued that Scenario 3, where someone experiences gender dysphoria (GD) but does not identify as transgender, is unlikely or implausible in the current climate. Given the strong cultural and medical association of GD with the transgender identity, modern discourse often frames the two as inseparable. This association has deepened as the term "transgender" has become normalized as an umbrella term, leaving limited space for individuals to describe their gender experiences outside this framework.

Furthermore, social and medical systems have evolved to categorize gender related distress under the transgender label, reinforcing the connection. The advocacy and visibility of transgender communities have also shaped public understanding, often aligning narratives of GD with transgender identities. This leaves little room for individuals to frame their experiences in ways that diverge from these widely accepted norms.

Despite this, the validity of Scenario 3 rests on the autonomy of individual identity and the distinct nature of GD as a clinical condition. It is possible for individuals to experience and address gender incongruence without adopting the label "transgender," emphasizing the importance of respecting diverse perspectives and personal choices.

Conclusion
Scenario 3 highlights the medical and logical plausibility of experiencing gender dysphoria without identifying as transgender.  This distinction allows for greater nuance in understanding gender diversity and supports personal autonomy in navigating gender identity and medical conditions.

The historical context provided by individuals like Renée Richards and Jan Morris demonstrates that addressing gender incongruence does not necessitate adopting modern identity labels.  These examples show how personal and medical decisions can occur independently of broader social categories, affirming that labels are neither a requirement nor universally relevant.

Critics reveal that the term "transgender" is not universally applicable, highlighting the importance of personal autonomy in addressing gender experiences.  Recognizing that Scenario 3 is possible expands our understanding of gender diversity and demonstrates that individuals can address GD without relying on contemporary identity labels.

Bibliography
[1] American Psychiatric Association.  (2013).  Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-5).  Discusses clinical definitions of GD.
[2] Stryker, S.  (2008).  Transgender History.  Berkeley, CA: Seal Press.  Explores historical perspectives on transgender identity.
[3] World Professional Association for Transgender Health (WPATH).  (2011).  Standards of Care Version 7.  Defines GD and its distinction from identity.
[4] Davy, Z., et al.  (2018).  "The gender dysphoria diagnosis and its implications for transgender health care." International Journal of Transgender....  Highlights flexibility in defining gender identity.
[5] Feinberg, L.  (1996).  Transgender Warriors: Making History from Joan of Arc to Dennis Rodman.  Explores variations in historical gender roles.
[6] Valentine, D.  (2007).  Imagining Transgender: An Ethnography of a Category.  Discusses debates and inconsistencies in defining transgender identity.

---

Take care everyone.

Best Wishes Always
Sarah B
Global Moderator
@Lori Dee

Good research, but I am not talking about "labels" or what people identify as. Everyone decides for themselves what they identify as.

I am talking about the experience of gender dysphoria in an individual. We currently call that experience "being transgender" for lack of a better term. We could easily call ourselves "gender dysphorics" instead of "transgender".

Any suggestions on what else we might call it? How do we refer to someone, or a group of people, who experience gender dysphoria if not using the label "transgender"?

I'm not picking a fight. I love you, Sarah. I'm just clarifying that what I meant was not about how people see themselves or labels that may or may not apply. I agree that the terminology has evolved over time. But for now, the definition of transgender is someone who experiences that incongruence to whatever degree. If you do not experience the incongruence, that is what we call cis-gender which is not transgender. I hope that clarifies what I meant. 

Quote from: Sarah B on January 05, 2025, 06:47:29 AMHi Sephirah

You said:

You are so on girl!  I would so love for you to do; 'Half Up Half Down', 'Fish Braid' or 'French Braid Pigtails' on Me!


Is this you!?

Anime girl with pink pigtails.

This is so me!

My hair barely reaches my waist, I did not inherit by mum's long hair genes.  After swimming I rinse my hair out.  Then after I have changed into some day clothes and packed my swimming bag away I apply a little hair conditioner, then comb through and let it hang out to dry, oh wash with shampoo once a week.  So cool.

Best Wishes Always
Sarah B
Global Moderator
@Sephirah

I would like to try out all of these hairstyles, except I would skip the total pink color.  As a highlight, yes, but not that exact shade or tint. 

However, these styles would only come about with a wig, unless I grew my hair out for a long while.

Chrissy

I must just say I did not have GD but my body needed to be female.

  I don't think one can transition without having "Gender Dysphoria", otherwise you would just stay the gender you were born with. Gender dysphoria is the distress one feels with their gender or not being comfortable with ones birth gender. That being said, after one expresses their 'true' gender, whether though surgeries or just dressing and acting as their desired gender the dysphoria abates or is reduced and one can be more comfortable in their own skin. Trans has many meanings depending on who you talk to. To me it is the act of change or the process of becoming your true gender. Others believe it means not being cis or born with your current gender. No matter the terminology being happy is paramount.  

Quote from: Gina P on January 15, 2025, 07:18:19 AMI don't think one can transition without having "Gender Dysphoria", otherwise you would just stay the gender you were born with. 

I kind of don't agree with this, honestly. I've seen too many people, not least here, transition and be very happy even though they didn't come from a place of dysphoria. I don't think you necessarily have to know the yin to appreciate the yang, as it were. And sometimes, the lack of dysphoria is a hurdle to people. Because they think it isn't real unless they come from a place of abject misery. It is a roadblock for them because they feel that they have to somehow be miserable in order to change their lives.

Which doesn't necessarily prove to be the case. It's different for everyone. And as you say, being happy where you are is the most important thing, not how you got there.

Quote from: Sephirah on January 17, 2025, 04:53:42 PMBecause they think it isn't real unless they come from aIt is a roadblock for them because they feel that they have to somehow be miserable in order to change their lives.

Which doesn't necessarily prove to be the case. It's different for everyone.

Yeah this, some people transition for gender euphoria instead of gender dysphoria.

Quote from: Lilis on January 17, 2025, 05:18:28 PMYeah this, some people transition for gender euphoria instead of gender dysphoria.

Mhm. What matters is where you're going, not necessarily where you came from. And today's world is much more open to that, thankfully. Choice is a powerful thing.

However, I forgot myself for a second.

How're you doing, Sarah? *big hugs* I'm in your blog, sittin' by your pool, eatin' all your shrimps.

Sarah,


I will read your extra long post soon.  Looks interesting.


Chrissy

With regard to your essay, Sarah... I feel like a lot of the problems surrounding what you talk about.. they stem from the world at large vilifying trans people. I would suggest that there are a lot of people who suffer from Dysphoria but don't identify as trans purely because of the seeming war on "wokeness" the modern world has. So a good many people suffer in silence. People like Donald Trump, Nigel Farage, Vladimir Putin. These populist con men, having no idea of what people are dealing with... they scare people into hiding. Threaten and bluster and live in their own little bubble. You have probably thousands of people who feel trapped, smothered, but can't identify or accept themselves. That's your no #3 scenario.

The world needs to be rid of these people, and this rhetoric, before a lot of people come out of hiding. Where they feel safe.

Hi Everyone

A thread that has just come back to life, What are the physical sensations of not having your "you know what" down there?  I considered answering in the thread itself, however once I got started, I realized that it was too long and it was more important to put my feelings and experience here in my blog.  I have left a link in the original thread so that one can come here and read, what I have written.

---

Introduction
I have been living without what I once had down there for 34 years so long that I have forgotten what it felt like to have anything else.  As I look back on the journey I realize that my day to day life did not dramatically change from one moment to the next.  Still, I used to wonder about what it would be like not having what I once had occasionally.  My routine stayed consistent in many ways yet the peace and contentment I felt after my operation was something I will never forget.

Pre-Operation
Before I changed my life around there are a few things that might need mentioning regarding to my life at the time.  I sat on the toilet from the time I was about 18 so that part of my life never changed and before surgery I was always tucking whenever I was awake although I did not bother at night.

My clothing choices were mostly skirts which felt natural and comfortable so there was never much thought about what I wore including stockings and underwear.    At that time though I still wondered how it would feel not having anything there, yet that curiosity never seemed to resurface after I made the change in my life.

Post Operation
Waking up from surgery the second time I felt a rush of peace and contentment wash over me as though a constant fog in my mind had finally lifted as I drifted of back to sleep.  It was an experience I will never have again or forget.  There was a sense that nothing was really different in my daily routine after surgery other than the need to use protection while I healed.

I was back to work within two weeks so I did not dwell on the physical differences.  The only thing that concerned me early on was dilation and I remember feeling embarrassed that I did not fully know my own private parts yet.  A nurse that was assigned to me, if I needed help, along with a dear friend helped me figure it out which was embarrassing, mortifying and a relief.

My wardrobe did not change much.  I continued wearing skirts basically for work and I did not have to always wear two one piece bathing suits when I trained.  I loved that I could wear anything without worrying about what I once had or discomfort.  In the weeks following the operation I occasionally felt intense shooting pains which I later understood were just the nerves firing as they healed.  Sometimes my friends would notice I was in pain and ask why, so I would casually mention I'd had surgery of some sort.

I did wear jeans on rare occasions like when I went to TAFE for a year.  Those were a tight pair of jeans and I realized even then that I did not think about what was down there.  As the years passed I found that I forgot what it was like to have what I once had down there.  Spending time with my boyfriend took care of that.

It is rare for me to dream about it but when I do it is upsetting especially if I imagine the operation was partially done.  Day to day there is not much difference in how I move sit or feel physically though I love that I can become excited without it being visible to anyone else.

Intimate times bring waves of pleasure throughout my body.  My levels of arousal can vary.  I need something inside particularly when I am with a partner and other times I only need gentle contact.  These experiences bring a smile to my face and I feel a sense of contentment knowing that my outside matches who I am.  If I ever do reflect on the past and what I used to have I can feel a wave of nausea yet that thought is very rare.

Conclusion
Now 34 years later it is hard to recall life before my operation.  I have spent more than half my life post operation so it feels natural for me to live this way.  My body and mind have long since settled into this reality to the point that it seems I have always been this way.  I can wear what I choose enjoy intimacy without worry and live with a peaceful sense of self.  After all this time I can honestly say that I do not miss what was once there and I am grateful for the sense of wholeness I have experienced for most of my life.

---

Those are my thoughts and feelings in regards to this issue.  If you have any questions in regards to this then, I will answer them if I can.

Take care and I hope your dreams come true.

Best Wishes Always
Sarah B
Global Moderator

@Sarah B
Dear Sarah:

Your special day and Birthday is arriving tomorrow on Friday, February 7th
                HOWEVER
because you live in Australia on the West side of the International Date Line
it is already tomorrow, so it is your Birthday right now, Friday afternoon 1:30pm

        Everyone one the Forum are wishing you a very, very
   H A P P Y  B I R T H D A Y
                                 

I hope that your "special" day plans include Cake, Candles, Ice Cream, and good times with loved ones.

                  On your February 7th birthday, check your profile for a special gift...
                                                                               

HUGS and best wishes for a wonderful day.
Danielle [Northern Star Girl]
                             

Seriously?

That is so wild for a number of reasons.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY IN THE FUTURE!!, my favourite Aussie Shiela!

Happy Birthday, Sis!

In Australia do they use upside-down cakes for birthdays? 

Big Birthday Hugs!

Quote from: Lori Dee on February 06, 2025, 09:34:16 PMHappy Birthday, Sis!

In Australia do they use upside-down cakes for birthdays? 

Big Birthday Hugs!

They do fairy bread. Which is both disgusting and adorable.