Quote from: Sephirah on April 25, 2025, 05:28:58 AMHaha, love you, girl. <3

Love you too! 💖

Quote from: Sephirah on April 25, 2025, 05:28:58 AMGo pay it forward and give Bobby a giant hug from me, okay? That pupper is just adorable. As is his mom.

You're making me blush again! 😊

Quote from: Sephirah on April 25, 2025, 05:28:58 AMThe off days are when you need people most. And girl, you reap what you sow. You are a massive force for good for so many people. Time to give a little back. *extra hugs*

Thank you, Lauren! 🫂

~ Lilis 💗

Hey everyone,

I've been thinking about the saying, "April showers bring May flowers," especially as I look at my patchy facial and body hair from ongoing hair removal treatments.

This phase feels a little messy, a little awkward, like a rainy, muddy April. ☔

But I know it's all part of a bigger process of growth and transformation. Like a flower being cultivated with care, even if right now I look more like a garden halfway through spring cleaning!

In a way, the electrologists, laser techs, and all the wonderful people helping me on this journey are like my personal horticulturists, botanists, and florists, nurturing the parts of me that are slowly emerging.

I remind myself that flowers don't bloom overnight.

It takes a lot of dirt, rain, and patience, and a few good gardeners (aka my amazing electrologist and laser tech!) to bring it to life.

So if you're in your "April" phase too, just remember your "May" is coming.

You're already growing in ways you might not even see yet.

With love,


~ Lilis 💗

@Lilis
Dear Lilis:
I absolutely loved how you composed and posted your "April showers bring May flowers"
reply comment.  Very well stated and nicely worded.

You are stating exactly what some of our transitioning members need to hear...  our transtion
journeys are not instant, it is an ongoing "work in progress"   
Almost everything involved in a transition journey takes time, effort, and in the case
of medical and cosmetic procedures... MONEY $$$

HTR can take more than a year to start displaying the desired and obvious desired effects 
in our body.  Hair removal, voice training, learning the ropes in the new desired gender...
... movement, grooming and makeup, clothing choices, etc, etc.

Four of your sentences say it very well:
 
    -> I remind myself that flowers don't bloom overnight.

    -> It takes a lot of dirt, rain, and patience, and a few good gardeners
        (aka my amazing electrologist and laser tech!) to bring it to life.

    -> So if you're in your "April" phase too, just remember your "May" is coming.

    -> You're already growing in ways you might not even see yet.

Thank you Lilis for your wisdom and for sharing your thoughts.

I am wishing you continuing success and happiness as you continue in your journey.
HUGS, Danielle [Northern Star Girl]          ❤️❤️❤️

Quote from: Northern Star Girl on April 26, 2025, 07:22:50 PMThank you Lilis for stating your thoughts.

I am wishing you continuing success and happiness as you continue in your journey.
HUGS, Danielle [Northern Star Girl]          ❤️❤️❤️

Thank you so much, Danielle! 💗

I sent a line from an ee cummings poem: "Spring is like a perhaps hand." Perhaps (ironically) it was 'blocked' out of concern re copyright (though the poem is in public domain). I included the single line three (if I recall correctly) verses from the top. Anyway, it seemed to be apropos at the time. I added an assurance that you will get through mudtimes and blossom. But you already know that.

Quote from: Lilis on April 26, 2025, 07:01:48 PMIt takes a lot of dirt, rain, and patience, and a few good gardeners (aka my amazing electrologist and laser tech!) to bring it to life.

I don't forget the fertilizer. Sometimes it takes a lot of manure to make those blooms extra beautiful. 

Quote from: Mrs. Oliphant on April 26, 2025, 08:42:54 PMI sent a line from an ee cummings poem: "Spring is like a perhaps hand." Perhaps (ironically) it was 'blocked' out of concern re copyright (though the poem is in public domain). I included the single line three (if I recall correctly) verses from the top. Anyway, it seemed to be apropos at the time. I added an assurance that you will get through mudtimes and blossom. But you already know that.

@Mrs. Oliphant
Thank you Mrs. Oliphant
    Here is the poem read by the poet and author - ee cummings: 
HUGS, Danielle [Northern Star Girl]

Quote from: Lori Dee on April 26, 2025, 08:43:50 PMI don't forget the fertilizer. Sometimes it takes a lot of manure to make those blooms extra beautiful. 

ROFL, 😂🤣😂

Quote from: Mrs. Oliphant on April 26, 2025, 08:42:54 PMI sent a line from an ee cummings poem: "Spring is like a perhaps hand.

Quote from: Northern Star Girl on April 26, 2025, 08:52:34 PM Here is the poem read by the poet and author - ee cummings: 
HUGS, Danielle [Northern Star Girl]

Thanks 🫂💗


~ Lilis

Danielle, Thanks! Hearing ee cummings' voice was a treasured gift! And, I suppose, the recording could still be copyright protected but not (if I read copyright law correctly) the text. But it makes no matter; the poem came to mind when I read Lilis' post. And, if she chooses to search for it herself, it will be worth the effort. Again, I've read all of Mr. Cummings' poetry but never heard his voice. Beautiful!

Just got home from my procedure, nothing serious, but I'm glad it's over.

I have to admit, seeing my gender marker change from (F) for Female to (TF) for Transgender Female brought up some mixed emotions.

There's a bit of sadness in it.

I had come to appreciate the visibility and affirmation that came with simply being marked (F).

Still, this feels like a sign that it's time to move forward with updating my legal name and gender marker on my ID.

Starting to look into the process now...

~ Lilis 💗

I had to do a double take on the DOB, using the UK way of writing dates, it should have been your birthday yesterday? But then I was like hang on... maybe 5th January. I get mixed up with that so often.

For what it's worth, you'll always be (F), no matter what they try to do to us. <3

*massive hugs* I am glad everything went well, sweetie.

Quote from: Sephirah on May 02, 2025, 02:46:36 PMI had to do a double take on the DOB, using the UK way of writing dates, it should have been your birthday yesterday? But then I was like hang on... maybe 5th January. I get mixed up with that so often.

Hah, same here! Yes, my real birthday is January 5th.

Quote from: Sephirah on May 02, 2025, 02:46:36 PMFor what it's worth, you'll always be (F), no matter what they try to do to us. <3

*massive hugs* I am glad everything went well, sweetie.

Being marked as TF feels more like being othered than affirmed. It's a reminder that, in society's eyes, I'm still seen as different. My sadness isn't rooted in shame... it's more like grief for a lost simplicity, or a deep longing to just be, without the need for constant explanation.

Still, I choose to pivot toward empowerment. I'm learning to hold space for that sadness without letting it stop me.

I focus on what's within my control and keep moving forward, even when the journey feels bittersweet.

Thank you so much, Lauren, for reminding me that no external label can ever change my inner truth, or how I'm seen by those who matter. 💗


~ Lilis 🫂

Quote from: Lilis on May 02, 2025, 08:25:48 PMBeing marked as TF feels more like being othered than affirmed. It's a reminder that, in society's eyes, I'm still seen as different. My sadness isn't rooted in shame... it's more like grief for a lost simplicity, or a deep longing to just be, without the need for constant explanation.

The thing is, Lilis, I don't necessarily think it's all of society. It's people in charge who have a certain issue with a certain group of people. And feel so threatened and/or invalidated by us that they have to try and make us feel ostracised. And this is how they do it.

Real people, on the street, you'd be surprised how many don't share this whole deal. And who just see Lilis as the gorgeous girl she is. I would say a good majority of people are smarter, both logically and emotionally. They look beyond the marker to the person they're speaking to face-to-face. That's been my experience, and I am kind of a freak, by comparison to you girls here. But even in this Transpocalypse the world is going through... what those at the top do, doesn't necessarily translate to the people you meet day-to-day. They just feel like petty little gods and it all goes to their heads.

I doubt most people who voted for Trump ever thought he would be this much of a nutter.

Quote from: Sephirah on May 02, 2025, 08:37:02 PMThe thing is, Lilis, I don't necessarily think it's all of society. It's people in charge who have a certain issue with a certain group of people. And feel so threatened and/or invalidated by us that they have to try and make us feel ostracised.

I've twice found myself in working in war zones where the majority of the people on both sides would quite happily have shaken hands, buried the dead together and walked away from it so they could live and love without having to duck stray rounds the entire time.

So for sure, it is not all of society, but despite that, the shallow end of the pool most surely can make a lot of noise and there are plenty in the media, both social and otherwise, who have no problem amplifying it.

Quote from: Sephirah on May 01, 2025, 10:02:43 PMYeah one day we need to see the mighty Lilis. <3

Quote from: Sephirah on May 02, 2025, 08:41:28 PMPlease don't do anything you aren't comfortable with okay?

Quote from: Lilis on May 05, 2025, 04:42:27 AM

I know, I know, I still have another 30 pounds to lose.

you look great lilis, you will get there. I have confidence in you.  🫂 🤗 Annaliese

Quote from: Annaliese on May 05, 2025, 05:25:15 AMyou look great lilis, you will get there. I have confidence in you.

Thank you, Annaliese! 💗


~ Lilis 🫂

Quote from: Lilis on May 05, 2025, 09:54:37 AMThank you, Annaliese! 💗


~ Lilis 🫂

I put a profile picture up. But it is not very femine. I have a long ways to go. But you encouraged me to post it. I am so self conscious about posting my picture looking like me. 💜

Quote from: Annaliese on May 05, 2025, 10:01:01 AMI put a profile picture up. But it is not very femine

You look amazing, and congrats 🎉 on taking this huge step.

QuoteI have a long ways to go. But you encouraged me to post it. I am so self conscious about posting my picture looking like me. 💜

Coming out is incredibly difficult, especially when it comes to claiming space online.

It takes a monumental act of courage.

It's a vulnerable decision, and yet, it's just one small step toward reclaiming space in this world...

space that was taken from us by a hostile world a long time ago.


~ Lilis 💗

You do look great, Lilis. It gives me something to hope for and look forward to. Thank you.