Ill try to take your suggestions and advice, thank you. Some people act like we dont belong or fit in with society, its crazy. I hope i never get hurt again, i wish we would just all get along as human beings but some people thrive on hurting and hating others even to the point of committing crimes against us and oppose us so much.
I crossdress and have attracted both unwanted and wanted attention, some guy said i identify as something i dont have i quote. Its insane. But while another guy said i was very beautiful. Of course i was wearing makeup too but all this doesnt define us or who we are and our sense of self, its merely trying to look more feminine. Women didnt always have makeup and some dont even put it on.
I dress male most of the time right now, not a cross between male and female and if i crossdress its all female dressing, no mixing the two. I still have to confirm if im non binary with the therapist. Think i am though.
I dont know about the big cities, that is a maybe, i own land in a very small town. I'm not sure id want to sell it and move somewhere else. The city is only 45 miles away so its relatively close by and near me. I dont know ill think about it to see if that would be the best option. I prefer to live in a more quiet and less chaotic place.
Id like to start over or restart after i decide to transition in order to get a fresh brand new start in life and live as myself easier and nothing reminding others of how i was before or what i looked like, i dont want to take the risk and chance of getting hurt. Its a tough choice and one that scares me a little but also is very exciting to me. That's really awesome about your flower garden and how successful you have been with it and that was very nice and polite and respectful of the commuter, that's some coincidence. I do intend and plan on growing things on my property but no one is going to notice it because my land is so remote and secluded, in the middle of nowhere. I guess i moved out so far off the beaten path is because when i do finally transition no one will know where i live and come bother or harass me. Neighbor is like a mile away and i doubt she'd do anything.