Yeh man I agree with Joey, I wouldn't even be transitioning now if I always thought about how 'second-rate' or incomparable I'd be! Gotta take the bone thrown to ya because that's all you get for dinner.

Quote from: GQjoey on October 07, 2008, 10:47:43 AM

Quote from: Elwood on October 07, 2008, 10:05:15 AM
While we're on the fake dick topic, I personally know from the anatomy of a real penis verses a prosthetic that the real thing is likely to be more interactive and thrilling... I don't want to be second-rate.

Of course it's going to be interactive and thrilling, for you, I, and majority of other trans guys. If you see yourself as being "second rate" to any bio guy simply because of a dick, you're going to sell yourself short the rest of your life.

WELL SAID.

*sigh*

I know guys whose thoughts and impulses reside largely in their pants. They may have dicks, but a large majority are dicks. It's so off-putting, from both male and female points of view.

You're inferior to no-one, none of you guys are.

Love, sexual intimacy and attraction takes many forms, only one of which is phallic.

If the chemistry is real then it doesn't matter if the lab equipment isn't.

Quote from: Elwood on October 07, 2008, 10:05:15 AM
While we're on the fake dick topic, I personally know from the anatomy of a real penis verses a prosthetic that the real thing is likely to be more interactive and thrilling... I don't want to be second-rate.

I have been hiding this for a long time too. I feel second rate and there is no way.. not having one in my view is "alright"

Quote from: Nero on October 07, 2008, 10:47:51 AM

Quote from: Elwood on October 07, 2008, 10:05:15 AMWhile we're on the fake dick topic, I personally know from the anatomy of a real penis verses a prosthetic that the real thing is likely to be more interactive and thrilling... I don't want to be second-rate.

I know man. And you'll do what you need to do. You're one of the guys with severe bottom dysphoria and I honestly hope you can find a surgery that will alleviate that.

But you've got to quit relating it to your chances of finding partners. You're a highly intelligent, charismatic guy whom plenty of peeps of any gender would love to date.
And remember that we didn't choose to be born this way.

To make matters worse, I'm working with a therapist with an awesome reputation but he tells me just not to think about it. He doesn't really have any solutions. The surgeries suck and testosterone is only going to give me a big clit.

Quote from: Elwood on October 14, 2008, 11:10:47 AM

Quote from: Nero on October 07, 2008, 10:47:51 AM

Quote from: Elwood on October 07, 2008, 10:05:15 AMWhile we're on the fake dick topic, I personally know from the anatomy of a real penis verses a prosthetic that the real thing is likely to be more interactive and thrilling... I don't want to be second-rate.

I know man. And you'll do what you need to do. You're one of the guys with severe bottom dysphoria and I honestly hope you can find a surgery that will alleviate that.

But you've got to quit relating it to your chances of finding partners. You're a highly intelligent, charismatic guy whom plenty of peeps of any gender would love to date.
And remember that we didn't choose to be born this way.

To make matters worse, I'm working with a therapist with an awesome reputation but he tells me just not to think about it. He doesn't really have any solutions. The surgeries suck and testosterone is only going to give me a big clit.

That sucks. Have you told him you've tried to forget about it already?

Yeah. But he says that worrying about it doesn't help, so logically I shouldn't.

I wanted to say, "I'm a man, so logically, I ought to have a penis."

But I didn't want to argue...

Maybe, in a sense, he has a point -- though he's certainly not putting it in the best way.

The serenity prayer (the part about having the serenity to accept what can't change) seems to apply. We all have suffered great loss in our lives, and dwelling on the loss can often just drag us down even more. But figuring out how not to dwell isn't easy at all. I certainly haven't figured it out.

Quote from: Elwood on October 14, 2008, 12:09:32 PM
Yeah. But he says that worrying about it doesn't help, so logically I shouldn't.

I wanted to say, "I'm a man, so logically, I ought to have a penis."

But I didn't want to argue...

So a guy who's lost his penis (due to accident or disease or something) is now a woman?

The worrying about it never goes away with some guys. I've found it has got worse after being on T for over 2 years and having chest surgery to be honest.

My GF has no issues with me not having anything in the trouser department. It's just me that sees it as an issue.

I'm looking into lower surgery but as Elwood has said the options aren't great. I think it's probably more stressful for transmen looking for a partner rather than those who already have one but I still feel I'm lacking in the bedroom department even though I'm told that i'm not, it makes no difference to the male brain.

I'm pretty sure there won't be a perfect solution, at least in my lifetime. You younger guys may be ok with stem cell research progressing the way it is though.

  snowdoggy