I was on the bus from college after a long day, two people (a guy and girl) sat next behind me. After a while their conversation came to me. Before I start, I must add I'm not out at college but I am androgynous looking (have been since I was a tot).

"Omg is that guy a guy or a girl?"
"He's a guy."
"How can you tell?"
"I asked a girl in a hort class and she said he's a guy."

--

"Is he pretending?"
"He must be gay"
"Is he?"
"Yeah"

I felt so crushed, I'm not gay, I'm not pretending, and I was moments from tears when I got home.

I got home, and just lay on my bed.

Whenever I get those kinds of comments it makes me laugh. I just find it funny how people react to it.

But, I'm sorry to hear about that. People like that just don't understand and it's hard for us to assume that they do when they've got so little knowledge.

I'm sorry sweetheart. *big nero hug*

should've turned around and told them to mind their own biz!!!

sorry you had to go through that abbi.

Once by mistake I got on the Metro in Washington DC right after a charter school had let out. Every seat in the train was filled with African-American teenagers. This was shortly after I had started estrogen, not long enough for it to have had any effect on my appearance.

When I stepped on and stood in the middle of the car, there was silence around me and furtive whispers for a couple seconds. Then one of the girls burst out very loud, "Oh NO!!!" and immediately the entire train car was filled with the loud, raucous laughter and jeers of the teenagers. They continued laughing at me for as long as I stood there. I stayed calm and showed no reaction. Meanwhile, I began to suspect I'd gotten on the wrong train, so I tried looking at the route map on the wall. The girl sitting in front of it ostentatiously leaned away from it until she was horizontal as if to keep away from my line of sight. I paid no attention to the continuing loud laughter and exited at the next stop with calm dignity. As I stepped out of the car, behind my back I heard a young man shout "->-bleeped-<-IN ->-bleeped-<-GOT!"

A easy answer comes from the movie Rent...

QuoteMimi: It's right that today's Halloween. It was Angel's favorite holiday. I knew we'd hit it off the moment we met. There was this skinhead that was harassing her... and she walked right up to him and said, "I'm more of a man than you'll ever be - and more of a woman than you'll ever get."

You are doing this for yourself and no one else. Your opinion is the only one that matters!

Sorry to hear that, but if I might add. If it happens again turn around to them and say: Hi my name is <Enter name here> you don't know me ergo you have no idea who I am or what my thoughts and desires are. Further more, would you be so kindly as to not include me in your conversation or talk about me as if you knew me; that is unless you wish to know me. If this is not the case do me this favor, would you kindly STFU. Have a nice day.

Quote from: abbii on October 16, 2008, 04:39:42 PM
I was on the bus from college after a long day, two people (a guy and girl) sat next behind me. After a while their conversation came to me. Before I start, I must add I'm not out at college but I am androgynous looking (have been since I was a tot).

"Omg is that guy a guy or a girl?"
"He's a guy."
"How can you tell?"
"I asked a girl in a hort class and she said he's a guy."

--

"Is he pretending?"
"He must be gay"
"Is he?"
"Yeah"

I felt so crushed, I'm not gay, I'm not pretending, and I was moments from tears when I got home.

I got home, and just lay on my bed.

Hello abbii.

I'm afraid that this will happen time after time.  Remember you are dealing with human nature.  Everyone of us deals with similar situations each and everyday.  We see the things around us and we compare what we see with what we know, and the norms we hold true. if what we see doesn't quite match these norms we try to explain the differences in away that makes sense to us.

There's nothing wrong with that and the couple behind you were doing exactly that.  You don't fit with their norms and so they are confused and make statements that explain away the confusion.

People are always commenting on appearance some times it's good and sometimes not so good.  Remember you can't hide away from this scrutiny you need to realize that this is their problem not yours.

To this day folks who know me often comment to those who don't, and yes it is disheartening but it is also apart of life.  Unless you are addressed directly simply ignore them, there are more important things in life than worrying about what people think of you.

Steph

Its your life.Your  words are the one which should matter to you>Dont be disheartened...