First I have to say that since the time I "felt" I had to go back to being a woman happened 17 years ago, and I swear not of my own will, there is of course a story behind that, but I purposely shut out all transsexual media coverage stuff because I knew it would make me turn back around to being Marco. Even though that is what happened in time anyway, which is what I had always wanted from the begining. Now that most of you are confused, I want to display what I have come across today as very disturbing. I have not seen the movie based on Rene Pena a FtM because I must of again shut it out when it aired on Showtime in 2004. I have though now veiwed the trailer which only upset me to the point of tears which is rare for me, reminding me of what my goal was 17 years ago and asking God why He made me turn back around to a woman only to find myself back to a man as I have always felt myself as. Here it is:


Learn about the extreme measures a person will subject himself or herself to just to "feel whole."  Josh Aronson, the producer of the documentary, did an outstanding job capturing the emotions of it all.  During the interview Josh asked me, "What would you like to tell Rene?"  My reply then was, "Stand in front of a mirror naked, look at your body, this is who you are."  Before the surgery Rene had a vulva, vagina, clitoris, and the scars where perfect breasts once were.  Now after the surgery I wonder if Rene accomplished what was wanted, to be a man.  The "penis" that was made isn't like a normal penis.  It doesn't even look like a man's penis.  At best, as seen in the documentary, it looks like a little boy's penis.  It will never function as a penis; it is a "released" clitoris that is overgrown due to the years of injecting testosterone.  Stop the testosterone injections and the body will revert back to what it really is – female.

I think it is an insult to our Creator to say as Dr. Raphael said in the documentary: "(Rene) he is a man with a VERY BAD birth defect."  Gender dysphoria isn't solved by surgery of the body.  It seems to me that such surgery only perpetuates the problems and issues of a person who thinks they are not what they are physically.  It is possible to love someone and tell them that what they want to do (or have done) isn't the solution.

A common experience that transgendered people share is the dreaming, wishing, and praying as a child to become the opposite sex from which they were born.  Why is this?  Is it because of emotional or physical trauma suffered at an early age?  Is the opposite sex seen to be more important or valued?  Is it simply a child's fantasy (like praying to "fly") that gets out of hand by the obsessions of a child?  I don't know.  But it seems to me that we've got to explore better alternatives in helping people accept who they really are rather than the mutilation of what they are.  If we don't, the concept of "birth defects" is given an entirely different meaning.  In the documentary, as Rene is seen watching Dr. Raphael's surgery Rene comments: "The first 5 minutes of the surgery when he began to tear-up the vaginal cavity I thought, Good God why would anybody let somebody do that to them?"

 

This stuff tears me up. The writer was the pastor at the church that Rene and his family were attending when word got out he was still female down below. I believe that God does not make mistakes, we are born this way for whatever reason. That we have the science to "fix" what we feel is wrong with our bodies, but our heart and soul stays the same. God looks at our hearts, not our bodies, and I feel the pastor who wrote that  and knew Rene missed that point. 

                                                   Marco

Whoa...I'm really confused by your post! You said that the pastor wrote that, but I can't tell where the pastor is speaking and not you.  Not to be a pest, but could you clarify that for me? 

Angelgirl,
 
    Is that better? I was afraid of that when it looked all run together. Thanks for pointing it out.

                                  Marco

Okay, I get it now! Thanks!

Well....that really does burn me up!

QuoteMy reply then was, "Stand in front of a mirror naked, look at your body, this is who you are."

If Rene had been born with spina bifida or cerebal palsy, would that be who he is, just a disabled person? Nobody is simply what they are on the outside, and I agree with you, Marco, that God cares about our heart and soul, not just our bodies. 

I think that pastor is a hypocrite.  He says that God makes people certain ways for a reason, and he apparently thinks that we shouldn't mess with that in the case of the transgendered.  But do you suppose he would say the same about using invasive open-heart surgery to correct a heart defect? Probably not.  Besides, all these technological advances are originally born from people's desire to help other people overcome their limitations, so what's wrong with using it?

I believe that God places obstacles in front us so that we can learn from them and grow spiritually, not so we can try to pacify those who might be offended or made uncomfortable by what our solution may entail. It is said that "God helps those who help themselves".

I also believe that God creates people so differently to help us learn to love each other and thus grow spiritually as a society as well. If there weren't all kinds of different people and conditions (i.e. races, sexual preferences, disablities, etc.) we wouldn't be able to broaden our hearts and minds enough to truly have compassion and love for one another.

For example, if I hadn't met Jocelyn, I may never have come to understand the transgendered.  At this time last year, I might have recognized a man dressed as a woman and I might have laughed or made mean jokes and I wouldn't have even realized just how cruel that would've been. I would've continued on, ignorant of an entire group of people that needs as much understanding as I would give to anybody else.

I think this goes for society as well.  Perhaps it has to happen on an individual basis to really hit home, but I think that these documentaries are a fantastic way to raise awareness. It's about time that society begins to accept and give rights to the transgendered.  Maybe one day, it'll be as commonplace as the women's right to vote.

Yeah...it's a pipe dream, but I try to be hopeful.

I'm surprised an FtM would participate in such a documentary, but maybe he wasn't aware of the tone the piece would take.
It's so easy for people like that pastor to spew such garbage as, "Look at your body, this is who you are." and "...helping people accept who they really are rather than the mutilation of what they really are."
God was good to him, so why should he care or even try to understand that this is real, that unlike him, some of us weren't fortunate enough to be born with the proper equipment.
He can't face the possibility that this could be real, that something so horrific as being born in the wrong body could actually happen, so he attributes it to a childhood fantasy (like praying to fly).
This really boils my blood, so I'd best stop thinking about it.
Good topic though, Marco.

Nero