Amy, I feel for you with your Dad. I think if I could have one wish, it would be to have my Dad for, say 5 or 10 more years, in good physical shape and mental shape. My Dad passed away 4 years ago and I still miss him constantly. I only wish he'd been around to help my Mum through the hard parts (for her) of my transition.
My Dad was, and I'm not exaggerating one tiny bit, the best man on earth and the best dad a kid could have. Before he died, he told me he was proud of me, but I think I could've been a better son for my father in many ways. He did live to see me married and it appeared to be a happy marriage at the time, so I'm glad he lived for that.
And we had a rockin' cross Canada trip, just him and me. The Grateful Dead on the stereo, wearing ballcaps backwards, smokin cigars and drinkin' beer (after the driving was over). I'll never forget it. It was the year he retired and I started law school. He helped me renovate my new apartment (aka rat-infested slum) when we got to Halifax, and deal with the fact that my then wife was having an affair.
I had awful gender problems as a kid. My Mum kept wanting me to be a girl. I remember 2 months where my Mum went back to England to take care of her family and it was just me and Dad. All summer I got to be a boy. We got up in the morning and went fishing. We built things, we fixed engines. We ate like bachelors (lots of cheese on toast). We shrank things in the wash. I got to wear what I wanted. When people assumed I was a boy, Dad went along with it and didn't correct them. I love my Mum, but life got hard again when she came back.
Yep, sure wish he was around now and had been around when I started transition.
Dennis
