Hi everyone I'm new here sort of! I've been reading this board for about 5 months now, and have had a logon for a couple of months just trying to get enough courage to post.
I sitting here in my nightgown with a glass of wine trying to relax,and get through this.
I've know that something was wrong since grade school when I felt comfortable hanging with the girls on the play ground instead of the boys. When I was about 6 or 7 I use to go to my "girlfriends" house where we would go to her basement and she would let me dress up in here dresses, and I would feel very special. My mother could never understand why I like to dress up as a girl each halloween !
That was back in the 60's and was scared to come out to anyone, because , well this was just not sometime you told anyone back then. (although I think my mom really did know something as she caught me a couple time with my sister trying on her clothes. she just told me to make sure I got them off before my father got home) As I got older I just hid me feeling and did the right thing as to not embarrss my family. I ve now been married for some xx years, and finally came out to my wife last year. At first she was did not understand, but was not mad, we talked off and on about why, for quite some time, and after she talk to someone else (she would let me know who), and she read a couple of books she said she thought she understood, and love enough to work through this, however she asked me at this point to keep it our secret, and not yet say anything to our kids. which I agreed. In fact she comfortable enough that we go out shopping together and she surprised me by buying the nightgown I'm wearing now, and last week a new skirt. She also told me my leg looked great when they are shaved and told me she prefers them that way! However she did say that we need to take it one step at a time and if I decide to see a therapist she like to be involved at some point.
Well I think I've posted enough for now and the wines running out ! so thank for letting me post.
Jamie
