Hi All.
I'm and MTF etc and starting to transition. Some of you would have seen some of my posts. I suppose Sunday is the worst day for me. I collect my wife from a nursing home, look after her, she cannot do anything herself. Take her back, feel like s..t, go to the gym and work it. Back home shower dress and usually in some nice formal clothes. Make myself a nice dinner. Cry. Go to bed. and tomorrow I'll have to be cross dressed in male clothes.

Sorry
Just Sunday coming down

Cindy James

Feeling lonely

I'm sorry things are so rough, at the moment.  *offers friendly hug* 

Quote from: CindyJames on January 18, 2009, 03:09:25 AM
Hi All.
I'm and MTF etc and starting to transition. Some of you would have seen some of my posts. I suppose Sunday is the worst day for me. I collect my wife from a nursing home, look after her, she cannot do anything herself. Take her back, feel like s..t, go to the gym and work it. Back home shower dress and usually in some nice formal clothes. Make myself a nice dinner. Cry. Go to bed. and tomorrow I'll have to be cross dressed in male clothes.

Sorry
Just Sunday coming down

Cindy James

Feeling lonely

I'm so sorry to here this Cindy, it just terrible what life is prepared to give us sometimes. I really hope you feel better soon.

If you ever need someone to listen, feel free to pm.

Feel free to talk to me also. You are not alone

Hi, Cindy,

Yes, I've seen your posts.  I can say been there, done that, got the tee shirt.

I hated Sunday, because I had to take off my makeup and nail polish and get ready to "drag" myself to work.

Though I haven't had the other issues you have and my heart really goes out to you!  That would be hard to bear even without being trans on top of it!

Anytime you want to cry on my shoulder, hon, just say the word!

-Sandy

Hi Cindy,

It is hard caring for someone that is not in a position to care for themselves.  My ex and I moved in with my folks to care for them.  It was a very long four years.   

I remember those days when I had to once again get into "drag".  But the day will come when you will know true freedom.  My day came on September 18, 2008.  And I have not regretted a minute.

You are a strong woman and even this you can overcome.

Janet

Thanks everyone.
Some times it's a struggle. Feel stronger this morning, particularly after your support.
Love to you all, and thank you
Cindy J

Wow Cindy,  it really looks like you have your share of stress in your life right now.  I really think you're in the right place here though.  As with the others, if you need an ear to listen to you or a shoulder to lean on I'm here.  You're not alone. 

Gwen

Thanks Gwen, and all of you.
As I said before I feel better today. It's now 6.30pm in Adelaide. Hot. 37C. My wife just called and she is being put into bed to sleep.
There is so much in life that we take for granted. Even us, who have not been given an even hand. Then again I qualify that because genetics doesn't give; just a random selection with mutations.
I still ask why at times. Why was Rebecca (my wife) so badly hurt in a simple fall, yet hoons crash cars into the innocent and walk away; the innocent left maimed.
Why do bikies get disablement pensions and never "work". I pay full accomodation fees for Rebecca because I work. No pension for us.

Sorry if I sound bitter. I'm not really.

But sometimes I have to get it out.

I know when I'm on high E I'll be a crying blob - look forward to it!

My love and best wishes to you all. I do regard you as my friends. Please feel free to email me direct. I'm unlikely to email and say Hi I'm the failure in emotional therapy

Love and my heartfelt thanks
Cindy James.

ps Thank you all of Susan's staff for providing this life saving place.

Dennis, you need to fish down under, we have goldfish bigger than that tiddler 











Yes I am a strong women. Always have been. I'm a loving one as well. I take pride in my feminity.

There is so much in life that we take for granted

True that, as Joni Mitchell once said, you don't know what you've got till it's gone.

Very true Tekla
Nice name BTW.

I have to admit however that after 50 years I'll be glad when some things are gone. Looking south at the time, scalpel in hand, 
Joking,
I've  :Dried self harm and it's not for me!

LoL
Cindy J

Ugh.. things are so overwhelming sometimes... I think my catchphrase of the past two years has been 'life is so crazy', things just don't make sense, even the fact that we exist sometimes.. but then I find usually just give it some time and one of those magic moments happen when it all comes together and even the most horrible things show their benefit, life is both good and bad, but the best is when you can just sit back for a second and see how painstakingly beautiful each and every thing, and person is.

thank god for those moments too, they've become my reason for living in spite of the bs, I see now that I can get through anything, they always arrive when I need them.

hope you feel better, we're all there for you!