Quote from: SusanK on January 20, 2009, 08:33:19 AMIf you have any complaints or arguments, it should be with the one (that I know of) who were in the documentary without having finished their transistion, meaning SRS. What's right about talking about your vagina if you don't have one?
I don't have any problem with the woman who elected to keep her penis being in the vagina monologues. I understand why it might seem odd to some people but it doesn't bother me. It seems like organizing the deck chairs on the Titanic to me. In other words why bother organizing the deck chairs when the ship is sinking? Besides most of us would agree that it isn't a vagina that makes or breaks our being women.
I know there are a lot of people (some who transition) who like to say that we will always be "trans", it is like they want to place limitations on us. And if we aspire to have a female life after transition then we are either "liars" or "delusional" or "setting up some sort of hierarchy".
Why would someone go through so much trouble, pain, expense and loss in order to out one's self as trans on national television?
I think the popular mindset is that we can have our womanhood by being "out" and by educating the public about being "trans" and so Society must shoulder the responsibility for our "transition". In other words there is no bar, the bar hasn't been lowered so much as it was buried in the ground so that no one might trip on it while running through the gate. There is no such thing as personal responsibility for one's own transition, rather Society is supposed to accept us through education. Transition is no longer even necessary, all we have to do is say we are trans and demand that people use our preferred pronouns.
But the way I see it is if I focus on being trans then that is going to be my life. If I focus on being a woman then that is going to be my life. One is much more difficult to achieve than the other (for most of us) so why bother? We can all just celebrate being out as trans, all the pressure is off us and on Society.
That is how I feel, I am sure others feel differently.
Post Merge: January 20, 2009, 10:26:53 AM
I just wanted to add that I am sorry if I needlessly wrote about my feelings regarding this in a way that caused others to experience offense. I really don't want to offend anyone and I was tired when I wrote my initial replies. I should have waited till I was refreshed to post.
Post Merge: January 20, 2009, 02:46:01 PM
Why worry about having a female sounding voice if the things you say about yourself will cause Society to gender you as something other than female?
We expect Society to change and to adopt the idea that a male can become a female. We think education is going to be our salvation. Education is useful for certain things but I have spent four years trying to educate people into understanding that I am female and it has had the opposite effect of causing people to think of me as male. I know from personal experience that to people who don't transition, "transsexual woman" = male. I have had some really heart breaking and frustrating experiences like Leslie talks about in the film. I wish I could have learned my lesson through someone else's experiences instead of having to learn through my own failures. I wasted so much time. But why listen to me? Experience is the greatest teacher. Acceptance is a lie. Acceptance is what women who transition seek when they can't have what they really need. I realize I am speaking for myself but there might be someone else out there who feels the same way and if there is this post is for her.
