QuoteYour height should be the last thing you're worried about Gregori. There are lots of short guys (me included -  5'5)

very true dennis! height doesn't make the man (i should know being a towering 5'3!), the heart and actions make the man.

it's great to see that your significant other is on here to support you. welcome Inga! the SO forum is great and i know that marco's girl and my girl are both active on there, i'm sure there's others but i'm never in that forum.

    tino

Quote from: Kate on July 03, 2006, 12:33:51 AM
Hope is more painful to bear than dispair.

And yet... and yet...

Gregori,
I apologize if I'm out of line here, but I think Kate makes a good point. You have medical complications and you don't want to fly on the wings of hope and anticipation, because it could bring you crashing down, am I right?
You mentioned that anesthesia is dangerous for you. I believe there are doctors who will perform top surgery without putting you under. And yes, reputable doctors.
Another thing you've mentioned several times is your height and your body's current state.
No, hormones can't turn you into an NBA player, but as Dennis and Tino said, there is nothing wrong with being short. At least you're taller than me.
Age is not really a factor for FtMs. I believe T works pretty much the same whether you're 25 or 45.
Guys correct me if I'm wrong about this.

Quote'I' have the fat deposits immediately associated with a girl.

I'm told hormones would correct this. If you want 'male' fat deposits it is possible. (But believe me, having 'male' fat deposits is not all it's cracked up to be. I'd be all too happy to donate some of mine.)
If your body could handle hormones, they would change your physique.

Only your doctor knows whether physical transition is possible for you, so I'm not going to tell you there is hope because I can't know that.
I haven't had surgery or hormones yet either, so right now I'm going through the same things you are - the dysphoria, the depression,etc.
I'm here if you need to talk.

Nero

I'm in a similar situation Greg.

For a myriad of reasons, I can't do anything about my dysphoria either.
I wish I could, I really do, but I am a realist and can envision the results pretty well.

If you can imagine a balding bigfoot in a dress with heels, you can imagine my results too!

If the technology ever becomes available, we'll trade bodies 

If it's any help, what gets me through the day is this.

Our bodies are like clothes for the soul.
I am no more this body, than I am the shirt on my back.

Sometimes we have to wear clothes we don't particularly like for certain occasions.

I figure, some soul that is close to me, needed me to wear this particular body for something or I wouldn't have done it.  If our soul is indeed eternal, then this entire life is a drop in the ocean of the time we have, and while it seems like a very long time while we here, in actuality, this life is like the special occasion you have to go to.  It's uncomfortable, it's miserable and stuffy and hot, and I can't wait to get through it so I can change into something a WHOLE lot more comfortable.  But, my time here has to mean something to someone or I wouldn't have done it.

Jessica

Welcome to Susans Gregori.

Melissa

Hi Gregori,

   I read your post when you first introduced yourself, but I didn't know what to say.
   It may help if you can put some private time aside each day or week for you to be who you feel you are, or to express yourself. I have found it helpful to make pictures. I can't draw, so I really just tried to express myself without feeling selfconscious and by allowing myself to run with my feelings. I understand that you are a male and I've never understood men, however, I have a friend (Bio Male) who likes to assemble models of autos and military planes (he is interested in military aircraft). When he is working on them, he is fairly mellow and I can see that it is his way of expressing himself and that it works for him. He does this at home and so the only people he has to interact with is his family and the occasional visitor like me.
   This is not a solution to freeing yourself of your angst, but it is a good method for you to allow your conscious mind to rest while your unconscious mind runs quietly in the background. Whatever time killer hobby or interest you choose should fit who you are. It should allow you to express your masculinity in a positive way.
   The obstacles that you face when you consider transition should be put aside when you are doing your hobby. Sometimes having some quiet introspective activity will help you to better find solutions to your problems later.

   I wish you luck in your journey. If you decide to transition you will want everything lined up; mind, soul, willpower, and self knowledge. I hope that you find your way with or without transition.


Best wishes,

Becky

Please pardon my absense.

Thankyou everyone.  I am coming out of another "black" time (well, I am still in it) and can barely think.  I do not mean to be rude by not replying... I just wish to let everyone know I am still "with us".  All I can do right now is read and feel comforted by the support here.

Expect intelligent replies when I can think.

^*hug* Thinking is overrated anyway

Gregori,
Very pleased to see you back. I apologize for some of my replies to you. You came here looking for support, and I put too much emphasis on transition, when you'd made it clear that wasn't a viable option for you. I couldn't bear the thought of another FtM suffering like that for the rest of his existence, it was hard to even think in those terms. I will take your word that transition is not a possibility for you. I'm here to lend an ear, a shoulder, anything you might need.

Nero

Come with us into the light.