I'm not coping. I don't know what to do. I had my surgery on the 28th and I've been crying and panicking constantly. I can't sleep or eat properly. I'm exhausted and scared and have never felt so alone and I don't nkow what to do. Dilation is so painful and I just had a revision and have to start doing dynamic dilation in a few hours which I can't even remember how to do right and the pamphlet says it's going to hurt so much and I just can't deal with anymore pain. I'm so scared and I just don't know how I can get through this. I don't even know if I'm cleaning properly. I've never been so close to giving up on life before.

I know this is a stupid thing to post, but I don't know what else to do. How can anyone survive this? How can things get better? I just want it all to stop. I'm not strong enough for this.

I can't speak to your issues as a whole, but one thing that I've found that helps is...when you have a gigantic problem, don't look at it as gigantic. Take on each little aspect of it and when you succeed, you'll start to get confidence.

I don't know how much pain you're going through exactly, but if you feel like you need to see a doctor, go. Don't wait for things to get better. They might not. There might be something wrong.

Approach every day as if the solution to all your problems is out there and you just have to find it. I have personally found that this outlook not only makes me feel more positive, but points my thinking in the right direction (ie, towards a solution).

If you give up, you won't have a chance to make things better. There simply *has* to be a way to solve your problems...you just haven't found it yet.

Hang in there. Don't give up. Things do get better. You are not alone. We are all here with you  {{{{HUGS}}}}