Quote from: Maryteresa on August 30, 2009, 06:00:42 PM
In my job I must look all male, so tights & panties under normal male trousers is as far as I can go.  Weekends I wear leisure gear, and in the Summer, shorts.   I have female shorts, which in dark colours look just shorter than mens' ones, and under a teeshirt walking my German Shepherd dog down our country road one lovely hot morning I attracted no attention.   That was hardly 'coming out', though.   I didn't seek to look at all feminine, I just like the feel of those short girly shorts.

My girlfriend had to pay a fine at the courthouse and I went with her dressed in white female shorts and a dark blue short sleeve female shirt.  This is fine however I also changed one under garment.  Instead of wearing a sports bra I wore a good support bra.  Hey the support bra is far more comfortable than the sports bra but it did cause undesired attention.  No one made any "verbal" comments to me.

However the less self conscious you are the less people care.

Seriously, I have never known a GG in my entire life who wore a girdle or a corset except maybe several of my aunts who were born 100 or so years ago. (now deceased) . Other than Dilliard's, I have never even seen them for sale. I know that sometimes these things might be "bondage" tools. What I don't get (guess I'm stooopid) is the seeming appeal of garments that really aren't part of the average woman's wardrobe. I know that hose can disguise unshaved legs as many people living as men aren't able to shave them due to negative feedback. Maybe it's just me, but I looked forward to wearing women's clothes for the comfort in hot weather and the big thrill of tossing my ties, belts, black socks,and leather oxfords. I have lived in the South since 1971, so maybe my view is skewed.( Back in the day when I was working as a dude, dude's were required to be covered from neck to toes even in 100 degree weather. The women could wear t-shirts and mini's in the same workplace. Of course, women dressed like that didn't make management.)

I see corsets as a fashion statement in that kind of Goth thing at concerts from time to time, girdles almost never - but they are still around. And as long as McDonald's is making Big Macs, I'm sure they are not going away completely.

Cinchers and more mild corsets make good foundation pieces for dresses. Not spring or cocktail dresses, obviously though.

Corsets are great to control weight and slim the waistline.  I have never worn them in the general public.  I have never found anything that can better train the waist.  I have not worn them at night for a year and my waist and weight have crept up. 

I have worn cinchers under male clothes with few comments.  A few times people thought I had a back brace.  The problem with cinchers is that I will break the hooks quickly since I will cinch them tightly.  They are expensive for me since they last only a month or two.  If you season a good corset you will need to get a smaller one before it wears out if you try to train your waist.

Since the thrust of my thread is not to draw attention to yourself I would advise not to wear a female corset under your male clothes to work.

.................

I did wear a male yellow shirt to work with a white collar and a silk tie with a mosaic of colors.  I got  a lot of favorable comments from many people.  I tried to find a male French blue Oxford button down shirt with a white collar and white cuffs but was unsuccessful.  I could have a custom shirt created for $130 but opted out.  I looked quickly in the female department and found many items that I liked but they would draw attention. 

I have become an unusual mixture of male and female measurements. My arms remain long as a male's arms and will stay that way.  My neck has fallen from XL to medium.  My chest measurements would be medium for a male but due to other differences would better fit in a large male. 

The female button downs I have seen had collars that were too small for a male tie and the sleeves were too short. A few female shirts that I liked were too frilly and would draw attention.

I did find a blue female Oxford button down that was suitable to wear to work but it was just plain boring.  It had the buttons reversed on the left side and that was about the only difference.

I will need to work harder to move off the fence to which I am firmly affixed.

This is just a response to this forum and some responses in it.

From reading I got an idea I wouldn't have thought of myself--the idea of wearing women's jeans, with a plain top [bought on the women's side of the store] and flats. I dress at home and go out dressed occasionally to clubs but sometimes I just want to take a walk or go shopping, without needing all preparation. [I may take a walk dressed but wouldn't go to the store] So I bought a pair of jeans and some plain tops [I usually go for frilly things so this was a new thing]--tried these on, and the jeans definitely give some less than male curves. I went to the grocery store in the jeans, a mauve colored top and plain black flats [that have the click-click sound as you walk] and of course nobody looked twice, but there's a fem feeling to it. So I'm thinking I'll try out bolder statements when the urge hits. Work up from the basic 'plain jane' outfit like the above, then add in things like the flats I have that have bows on the toes, or a slightly more feminine blouse/top with hints of frills or something, a bracelet, etc. Kind of fun   

On Friday I dressed for work in an XL Lady Hathaway black button down short sleeve shirt.  I wore a pretty male silk tie with a blend of burgundy and red colors. A couple of male teachers gave me some snide comments and a couple of female students just said I was wearing a female shirt.  I pushed the envelope but felt rather comfortable in my attire for "casual Friday" and left the door open to try other things.

On Saturday a girlfriend invited me to the SCC and I wore the same black female shirt and swapped the tie for a female necklace.  I swapped male trousers for female pants and I swapped male shoes for female sandals.  I also applied polish to my finger and toe nails.  My undergarments were nice.  It was a fun day and the people at the conference were all friendly.

Today I went in with a collared Land's End women's shirt that looks very much like a men's shirt, but with subtle differences (also a nicer, somewhat brighter blue color). I also wore a subtle necklace (necklaces matter to me).

Combine that with black slacks/black shoes, and the presentation was pretty male. It worked fine and I felt good.

Take a look at LLBean or Cabela's online catalogs. They have many pants, tops, shoes and coats that you can wear and enjoy the fit of women's clothes without looking overly female.   My daily wardrobe is made up of clothes like these and I never seem to get a strange look.

i like ll beans newengland collection of female cloths the turtlenecks and sweaters can realy be uni just depends on the style i guess. you are much braver then me i wont dress out for work i need to keep this job for a while but i do were feminine undercloths its my comprimise. once i have ffs i will go full time im just not into hearing any more snide comments or underbreath inuendos good luck hun
jessica

Jeans...girls jeans are so trendy among the metrosexual/emo/scene guys now that no one gives it a second thought.

and no one can see your underwear if you have pants on!

well, to start with a trip to sears at about 5:30 pm on weekdays allows easy shopping and if creative u can try on outfits. Sears has nice womens blouses and slacks and with low heel black or brown oxfords you can be be wearing conservative womens clothes and feel great and feminine  but not be in a hi- profile mode.
i have dont this with success.

Well I now have have gone to school in long female sweaters covering a male button down and tie.  One student told me she likes my dress and she wears it with leggings.  A couple of male teachers laughed at me. 

I then got a pixie hair cut and all of my facial hair has been removed.

One male teacher said in ear shot that I am "flaming" gay.  What is "flaming" gay?  The male teacher that said that is just plain gay and 15 years my junior.  I think he likes me.

You can do some things but it does get noticed.

Good for you, Wendy.

As you suggest, our attire is of course not a 'flaming' example of anything--except maybe the flamin right to wear whatever the !@@@!  we want!~ If someone wants to 'interpret' this, let them.

  I routinely wear women's jeans and women's loafers [2.5 inch heels that go clippety clop], with nude panty hose underneath and a bright colored top bought on the women's side of the store.   While I wouldn't wear this to work, I don't now think twice about wearing it locally, in cafes or going to store, etc.

Quote from: Wendy on July 16, 2009, 11:07:44 AM
I am not having much success in wearing female clothes and not drawing attention.  I want to shift my clothing slowly so that no one notices.  I did wear a business woman's wool white pants to work and got no comments.  They looked good and got no reaction.  That was perfect.

How can people shift gradually so that no one notices?

Try taking up bike riding. You get to wear all this totally unisex lycra and get away with it. One thing I've always been envious of is women are able to wear tight fitting leggings and a nice top with nothing else. I think it looks great but society for some unknown reason doesn't like to see men doing this because their 'man bits' are showing. I dream of being smooth down there so I can proudly show off my legs in lycra leggings

On a more serious note, I do know what you are getting at. I too look very male and other than wearing pretty panties underneath I can't yet easily get away with wearing outwardly obvious female clothing. Until (or if?) I take HRT this is a real problem. I like some of the suggestions posted that suggest more androgynous but importantly, female clothing. At least you can feel more feminine without being too out there.

This is a very important issue, because self esteem is a major reason for all the internal conflicts I am going through. I for one don't need any more grief. The other vitally important issue which is hugely important to me is passing. I'm too fragile to be constantly challenged. That is part of the reason I'm not very good at cross dressing. I look in the mirror and instead of seeing the girl I think I am, I see a male. This is very confronting and makes me all the more self conscious if I go in public. It's a real catch 22 for me.

Alexie,

The hormones help, but some of us still look very male.  A male nose remains a male nose even after hormones.

I got new pretty clothes but I could not wear them all at one time to work.  I can blend a few pieces at a time and make a nice outfit and still keep my secret.

Over time the boundaries may fall.  No less is clothing restricted so are colors.  I got a nice long purple female sweater that I have not yet wore to work. 

Quote from: Wendy on December 02, 2009, 07:53:15 PM
Alexie,

The hormones help, but some of us still look very male.  A male nose remains a male nose even after hormones.

I got new pretty clothes but I could not wear them all at one time to work.  I can blend a few pieces at a time and make a nice outfit and still keep my secret.

Over time the boundaries may fall.  No less is clothing restricted so are colors.  I got a nice long purple female sweater that I have not yet wore to work. 

Wendy,

I'm so excited about the prospect of taking hormones and developing breasts, getting softer skin and getting my fat deposited in a more feminine pattern. Even getting a waist I still don't know whether I will go down that path, but it's wonderful to dream.

So I'm not sliding too far off topic. I might point out here that I got brave and shopped in the women's section of Target and bought myself a lovely pair of stretch shorts. I wear them over my panties and feel great, but most people are none the wiser. It's a start anyway.

Alexie

Quote from: Alexie on December 02, 2009, 09:18:17 PM
I'm so excited about the prospect of taking hormones and developing breasts, getting softer skin and getting my fat deposited in a more feminine pattern. Even getting a waist I still don't know whether I will go down that path, but it's wonderful to dream.

So I'm not sliding too far off topic. I might point out here that I got brave and shopped in the women's section of Target and bought myself a lovely pair of stretch shorts. I wear them over my panties and feel great, but most people are none the wiser. It's a start anyway.
Alexie

Alexie, you are not off topic at all.  If you eat a good diet and take hormones the muscle mass will leave over time.  Suddenly you can fit into clothes that you thought would never be your size.  Many of my friends have modest breast development but I did fine in that area.  Also I have a waist.  My rear remains modest even for a male.  In nice female clothing my figure is O.K.  My figure would be that of an older female.  The softness of my hands and skin on my face is equal or better than a female my age.  I have less body hair than females so that I no long chaff and clothes can fit.  Some female clothes just fit better than male clothes.  However at the end of the day I still present male and when I do something that is out of the strict bounds imposed on males it draws attention.  I have also found that if you can just shrug your shoulders and feel comfortable you can do some things.  I do more than I thought I could.

Oh I feel uncomfortable shopping in the women's section of stores.  I get some glances or giggles but no comments.   ...And if I buy it I wear it.

I used to wear womens clothing all the time when I was living outside of my parents house. It was natural and I loved finding new clothing. Unfortunately my meager salary prevented me from shopping for attire as much as I wanted.

One nice thing was I lived near a Buffalo Exchange. There were some decent clothing there and it was affordable. I'm not so sure about now because things sometimes start taking a trendy, bloated turn.

I'm living at home and I guess you could say I'm in boi drag. I wear slacks, jeans, tennis shoes, and a clean t-shirt. I have two or three female tops in my closet but since I live with the folks I feel I can wait. Still it kills me to wear such uni clothes all the time especially when there are men out there who I like and want to impress! Shallow but true. Who wants a girl who doesn't give a care about her appearance??? Sorry if I went off topic but I empathize with the wanting to dress up sometimes even though my sitch may be a little different.

Quote from: Mia B on December 05, 2009, 09:48:58 AM
I used to wear womens clothing all the time when I was living outside of my parents house. It was natural and I loved finding new clothing. Unfortunately my meager salary prevented me from shopping for attire as much as I wanted.

One nice thing was I lived near a Buffalo Exchange. There were some decent clothing there and it was affordable. I'm not so sure about now because things sometimes start taking a trendy, bloated turn.

I'm living at home and I guess you could say I'm in boi drag. I wear slacks, jeans, tennis shoes, and a clean t-shirt. I have two or three female tops in my closet but since I live with the folks I feel I can wait. Still it kills me to wear such uni clothes all the time especially when there are men out there who I like and want to impress! Shallow but true. Who wants a girl who doesn't give a care about her appearance??? Sorry if I went off topic but I empathize with the wanting to dress up sometimes even though my sitch may be a little different.

"Boi drag"... I love it. It is so true and so descriptive  .

Mia, there is nothing shallow about wanting to impress the guys. That's our right as girls isn't it?
Your desire to be feminine is wonderful, beautiful and perfectly natural for girls like us, but I definitely relate to the fact you live with the folks and this can be very frustrating and limiting until you come out. All I can say is feel free to be female if that's what you feel.

Love, Alexie.