Hello, hello- I hope everyone is doing well today.
Where to start... hmmm... well, first of all, my name is Ashlee and I am a girlfriend of a m to female Transsexual who also has a username on this forum. (Aiko)
Brief intro aside, I have some concerns with how her mom is reacting to her coming out. Fairly recently, she sent an e-mail to her mom telling her that she is transsexual, and asking if their insurance would cover at least gender therapy. She had told her mom before over the phone, but her mom dismissed it and it was not ever brought up. Her mom e-mailed her back stating that she will look into the insurance thing. I was very excited for my SO, because that meant maybe her mom was ok with this and actually wanted to help.
But, unfortunately, our relief came too soon. Because her mom, in a recent conversation, stated that she didn't believe her and that it was just depression and that it is also MY fault. (Because her parents know I am a lesbian)
I can kind of understand why she would blame it on me, after all her parents (Especially her dad) are pretty religious, and aren't very understanding of this kind of thing. My question is: Should I send her mom a friendly e-mail telling her about how my role is only for support and not to make Sam think she is a girl? Because Sam has known she was a girl since she was very young, as do a lot of transsexuals. Yes, Sam and I have known each other all of our lives, but I doubt that as a child I could have influenced her transsexuality. Honestly, can anyone really become transsexual because of someone else? I don't think so, I believe that you are born that way, just like how I was born gay.
Her mom also told her that she is too young to know that kind of thing. I don't think any age is too young, and besides the point, we are both 20. I don't think that even to a normal person's mind 20 should be too young. Her mom is just frustrating me to no end, because I know that she may never really understand an accept it. It breaks my heart. D:
All in all, her mom wants her to see a normal therapist first, because she thinks it's just a bout of depression and that it's my fault. Sam has been depressed all of her life, but I wonder why! Maybe it's because she is transsexual? I want to e-mail her mom and explain this all to her, but would that be over stepping my boundries? Sam told me it's ok, and I most certainly would not be rude in my e-mail.
Also, would a normal therapist even understand or would they just put her on meds? Medication is not the answer, and it will jsut be a way to cover up the deeper issue. Also, I am afraid that if Sam goes on meds, will she be the same person anymore? Medication can do weird things to a person's personality. D:
There are just all of these worries going through my head, and it's making it hard for me to sleep. Has anyone else gone through something like this? Do you have any advice?
