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How do you deal with the stress?

Started by Brynn, December 22, 2009, 12:51:29 AM

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jesse

i sleep or read when im really stressed other then that its gym time i find a few miles on a treadmill does wonders for my sanity
jessica

p.s. brynn chill a little bro noones attacking you here
like a knife that cuts you the wound heals but them scars those scars remain
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tekla

Well since you opted out of the number two way that people deal with this, at least the ones I know, which is by exercise, I just thought I'd submit the number one most popular way to deal with holiday stress in Christendom, both numerically as well as historically. 

And it works for just about everyone in the family.  There is a reason that so many of the popular holiday drinks are kind of fru-fru, like eggnog, mulled wine, hot buttered rum, brandy and coco, its so that grandma and the kids can have some too.  Matter of fact, I bet the first time that lots of people get to drink with their family for the first time is stuff like eggnog and wine with Christmas dinner.

And for sure, if it's the twenty-second time you've heard Aunt Clara tell that damn endless story that goes nowhere that she always tells at the holiday gathering it sounds a lot better as you're working on your fourth or fifth egonog.

It's not like some weird fringe deal, the number one industry where I live is making wine, (and its swell buddies:champagne and brandy).  The number one cash crop is mary jane.  And remember, I'm in Northern California, its not 'recreational' it's 'medical.' ... see, I got's me a note from my doctor right here...

Of course, there is the way that most adult people I know deal with whatever family stress this holiday brings on.  They don't do it.  After all, it's your holiday too.  Why be forced to spend it doing something you hate? 

Think about this.  Most resorts not only have the most expensive rates this time of year that they have for the whole year, they are also booked solid.  Sure some of that is families doing the family thing - I know lots of families who go up to Tahoe and do that Black & White Christmas thing of hitting the ski slopes and the blackjack tables.  But lots of resorts are filled with people 'getting away from it all' and mostly what they are getting away from is their own family.

Some ad on TV has this guy saying "It's your money, spend it when you want to" and I'm just saying "It's your holiday, spend it how you want to."  Tell mom and pop's that next year you're going to Tahiti, or Breckenridge, or you going to LA or NYC.  And do that.

Here is something that only City people types know for the most part, but the big hotels in the big cities have special Christmas Dinners that are AbFab.  You don't have to cook at home, why not have four-star Jacques do it for you?  And not only the cooking, other people do the clean up too.  I did that once with friends back when all we all had was little studio apartments and no one had enough room to cook Xmas, much less serve it - and we sure didn't have the money to get back home, so...  We got all slicked out and went to the Saint Francis and had a table for the 8 of us.  One of the best times I've ever had at Xmas. 

Other ideas!

-How come so many movies come out on Xmas day?  Because, as it turns out, other people have trouble with their families too and find sitting with the lights out and making everyone else be quite for a few hours is well worth the price of a movie ticket.  While there, you can meet up with all the people who don't celebrate Xmas at all who seem to find that December 25 is, as they say, Kung Pao and a movie day.  (That's because Xmas is no big deal the Chinese Community and if you went to Chinatown in SF or LA on Xmas it would seem like any other normal business day, and that outside of the big hotels doing their special dinners, Chinese places are the only ones open.)

- For years I was alone in the big city for the holiday.  And I would get with the girls from the Imperial Court, and we would all doll ourselves up in our bestest little Xmas outfits and hustle our little butts down to serve dinner and give out presents to homeless persons.  And we went to do this, not at the sort of popular homeless meal place they show on TV, This was a few rungs below that, these were some very desperate persons.  I dare you to do that and come away feeling either angry or hostile, or feeling anything that resembles self-pity.  When we ended at about 3pm, I'd catch the bus that went right by there and ended up out at Land's End, and I'd walk the paths on top of the cliffs, watch the sun set into the Pacific and everything felt pretty good in my little world at that point.  And if the whole homeless deal is too much for you, there are all sorts of people who need a little special service on Xmas day, so be of service.

- I know a pile of people, and I kind of indicated above that I'm sort of one of them, who know the Xmas day is the best day almost to get out and do something outdoorsy, you'll have pretty much the entire world to yourself.  I've been out at the Coast on Xmas and didn't see another person the entire time.  The Redwoods are dead quite.  The bike trails all yours.  No hordes of people trying to surf, just a few of the real die-hard, hard-core ones (who as it turns out are the most fun to watch too).  Matter of fact, the early afternoon, say 12 to 4, is an awesome time for a hard core bike ride, as your hard pressed to ever find a time with so little traffic. It's like racing through the Day the Earth Stood Still.

FIGHT APATHY!, or don't...
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GnomeKid

I'm going to be extremely honest and tell you I'm an escapist. 

I escape into video games and books.  The Zelda series is my favorite when it comes to video games Ocarina of Time has gotten me through more than you can know.  When it comes to books I mostly enjoy childrens(ish) fantasy/magic books (harry potter FTW) and mysteries (Sherlock Holmes is by far my favorite, though I'm currently quite buried in a Perry Mason story at the moment)

Another tool in my escapists artillery is my love for "non-addictive"substances (aka no alcohol/cigs/coke/meth/heroin ect.) ...mostly just that stinky green.. though other psychedelics are bound to make their way into my bloodstream on occasion

In my life... things are fleeting, and I try to keep it that way.
Though I really do need to get my parents to stop calling me and my sister "the girls"

Another way I deal with it is to try to think of it from their side of things... For the past at 20+ years my parents have been referring to us as "the girls" and referring to me as "she"  Its going to take more than a month or two to get that out of their heads as correct. 
I solemnly swear I am up to no good.

"Oh what a cute little girl, or boy if you grow up and feel thats whats inside you" - Liz Lemon

Happy to be queer!    ;)
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Alessandro

Quote from: GnomeKid on December 24, 2009, 02:47:23 PM
I'm going to be extremely honest and tell you I'm an escapist. 

I escape into video games and books.  The Zelda series is my favorite when it comes to video games Ocarina of Time has gotten me through more than you can know.  When it comes to books I mostly enjoy childrens(ish) fantasy/magic books (harry potter FTW) and mysteries (Sherlock Holmes is by far my favorite, though I'm currently quite buried in a Perry Mason story at the moment)


Same here you know, gaming and books.  I'm also a writer, that represents a huge chunk of escapism.  On the flipside, because of such a high level of escaping, pretending to be someone else and just generally trying not to think about being me, it took me this long to figure out I was trans.  So escapism isn't everything   :D
"You can't look where you're going if you don't know where you're going"
-Labyrinth
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Brynn

Quote from: Arch on December 24, 2009, 02:58:38 AM
I think Tekla might be saying, at least in part, that drugs are how we define them. Birth control pills. Ibuprofen. Caffeine. Testosterone. Booze. Pot. Which ones are "drugs" and which are "medication"?

Heh. I remember a huge junior high drug assembly that I was forced to attend. The first question the presenter asked was, "How many of you use drugs? Raise your hand if you do." No hands went up. Then he said something like, "So, nobody here even takes aspirin?" The funny thing is that when he asked the opening question, I was thinking almost that very thing--"Well, I take cold medicine sometimes; does that count?" I was just being internally snarky, though. I sure as heck didn't raise my hand.

Brynn, I used to go for a drive before I came home from support groups and stuff like that. If it was nighttime, I could get on the freeway and just drive--and yell at the top of my lungs. Boy, it was good to get that out.

As a teenager, I used to do something very similar when my parents dragged me to football games. Yelling and screaming at ball games is a GREAT way of venting your frustrations. I highly recommend it. And you can do it in your own living room. Except I guess football is mostly over, so you'll have to choose a different game. But there are bowl games...
Ah, I'm just now learning how to drive though, sadly.
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Chamillion

Drugs don't help with stress in my experience, they just added to it.

Now I'll write, go for a walk or drive, work out, listen to music.  Anything where I can clear my mind.  When I'm stressed, I like to deal with it alone.  If I go out and party to get away from it, I usually don't feel better after.  Works for some people, just not me.
;D
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Brynn

Quote from: tekla on December 24, 2009, 11:13:37 AM
Well since you opted out of the number two way that people deal with this, at least the ones I know, which is by exercise, I just thought I'd submit the number one most popular way to deal with holiday stress in Christendom, both numerically as well as historically.
There's a difference between opting out of something and being incapable of doing it due to time constraints.
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fluffy jorgen

Sleep, sleep and more sleep, I suggest.
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Brynn

Quote from: Jörgen, on December 25, 2009, 08:20:30 PM
Sleep, sleep and more sleep, I suggest.
I actually got a nice long nap in today. ;) Me, my mother, and sister all crashed for a couple hours today.
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Silver

Quote from: GnomeKid on December 24, 2009, 02:47:23 PM
I'm going to be extremely honest and tell you I'm an escapist. 

How could I forget? Video games, books, the internet, friends. Drawing pictures, taking walks. Nice ways to forget reality for a moment and unwind. Then back to it of course.
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GamerJames

I know I'm a couple of days late, but here are my ways of destressing (yes I know you mentioned "no drugs" but since it's one of the things I do, I'll still keep it on the list - you don't have to participate):

- I paint
- I play Nintendo (I'm a big Nintendo-fanatic, I own all the home systems and play them all regularly)
- I read anything that has words (whether novels, comic books, poetry, non-fiction, magazines, fan fic, blogs, forums, anything)
- I smoke a little weed from time to time. I'm not chronic, but I do enjoy the relaxation (and the laughter) that goes along with getting a little high now and then.
- I watch funny stuff. Movies, shows, YouTube vids, whatever.
- I write (though not well)
- I cuddle with my cat
- I go hang at a bookstore or some other eclectic little hangout
- I take a book to a teashop (or coffee shop) and chill

As you can see, there's a lot of overlap in there, but it all just depends on the day and which appeals to me more at the time. :)
♫ Oh give me a home, where the trans people roam, and the queers and the androgynes play... ♫

Facebook | YouTube
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fdfge



- I paint
- I play Nintendo (I'm a big Nintendo-fanatic, I own all the home systems and play them all regularly)
- I smoke a little weed from time to time. I'm not chronic, but I do enjoy the relaxation (and the laughter) that goes along with getting a little high now and then.

i ->-bleeped-<-ing love nintendo..own almost all the mario 64 games
we would get along very well lol

besides nintendo and the weed (although sometimes getting high is  reminder of my problems, unless im with friends then its just fun) i run, bike snowboard, really any form of excersize helps as it releases endorphins which makes me feel good about my body
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GnomeKid

Quote from: fdfge on January 05, 2010, 03:17:48 PM

- I play Nintendo (I'm a big Nintendo-fanatic, I own all the home systems and play them all regularly)


ME TOO! except the virtual boy... I've yet to come across one that wasn't cracked, and wasn't old enough to buy one when they were first out.
I solemnly swear I am up to no good.

"Oh what a cute little girl, or boy if you grow up and feel thats whats inside you" - Liz Lemon

Happy to be queer!    ;)
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GamerJames

Quote from: GnomeKid on January 05, 2010, 09:24:53 PM
ME TOO! except the virtual boy... I've yet to come across one that wasn't cracked, and wasn't old enough to buy one when they were first out.

Virtual Boy isn't a home system, it's a "portable"... (Which I put in scare quotes, cuz it's not really all *that* portable, lol). And no, I don't have that one (yet) either. In fact, my portable collection is pretty small. Currently only an original GB, a GBA, and a DS. :(

But for my home systems, I have the NES, SNES, N64, Game Cube, Wii (plus a few accessories, Zapper, Game Boy player for Game Cube, Game Genie, etc). They are my preciouses... ;)

I saw a vid the other day of some crazy chick smashing her boyfriend's Xbox 360, and while I don't care much for the Xbox, the thought of someone doing that to one of my systems LITERALLY made my stomach queasy. I was all tense and "icky" for awhile after watching that vid, then I had to remind myself:

A) It was just a vid on the intarweeeeeebz
B) Even if something sad :icon_cry2: happened to one of my systems, I could still (for the next few years at least) replace it
C) I sure as hell wouldn't allow anyone that unstable in my home anyways

Then I was okay. lol ;D
♫ Oh give me a home, where the trans people roam, and the queers and the androgynes play... ♫

Facebook | YouTube
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Lachlann

Quote from: NES_junkie_James on January 13, 2010, 11:09:58 PM
Virtual Boy isn't a home system, it's a "portable"... (Which I put in scare quotes, cuz it's not really all *that* portable, lol). And no, I don't have that one (yet) either. In fact, my portable collection is pretty small. Currently only an original GB, a GBA, and a DS. :(

But for my home systems, I have the NES, SNES, N64, Game Cube, Wii (plus a few accessories, Zapper, Game Boy player for Game Cube, Game Genie, etc). They are my preciouses... ;)

I saw a vid the other day of some crazy chick smashing her boyfriend's Xbox 360, and while I don't care much for the Xbox, the thought of someone doing that to one of my systems LITERALLY made my stomach queasy. I was all tense and "icky" for awhile after watching that vid, then I had to remind myself:

A) It was just a vid on the intarweeeeeebz
B) Even if something sad :icon_cry2: happened to one of my systems, I could still (for the next few years at least) replace it
C) I sure as hell wouldn't allow anyone that unstable in my home anyways

Then I was okay. lol ;D

That sounds terrible! I'd throw a fit if someone touched my systems or computer like that.
Don't be scared to fly alone, find a path that is your own
Love will open every door it's in your hands, the world is yours
Don't hold back and always know, all the answers will unfold
What are you waiting for, spread your wings and soar
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