Quote from: Alyssa M. on January 20, 2010, 06:22:46 PM
nurture is nature. There's no bright line.
^ I love that

...and totally agree with everything else you said.
Post Merge: January 20, 2010, 11:44:30 AM
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Okay and the rest of this is for Muffin-
Maybe one day I will unknowingly accept that I am TSI think your life will be much easier for you when that day comes. I think you understand that though

.
I think I have a different way of thinking about the word "Transsexual" than you do. For me, TS is a pronoun not a noun. Like, I don't identify as a TS, it just is part of who I am. I would never ever ever ...ever say I'm a transsexual. I might, however, say I'm a TS woman, just like I'm a tall woman, or a white woman. TS, for me, is really just shorthand for woman born male. ...Does that help, maybe?
Also, I don't want you to misunderstand this, I wasn't suggesting that anybody "fly the flag" all I was trying to convey was if you weren't ashamed of this aspect of your womanhood, then talking honestly about your past (if you needed to) wouldn't have to be so horrifying anymore- which more importantly, means you wouldn't have to keep track of a fictional past-- which even more importantly, means you wouldn't have to be living a new kind of lie.
Personally, I have no interest in advertising my past. In practice I avoid such subjects. I'll say something like 'I don't like talking about my childhood' or whatever. For 99.9% of people I meet, it just isn't their business.
I need to feel that transition is something temporary and that I will be me (female) and not forever a TS just because of a few bad apples.
Maybe I need to delude myself, maybe I need to to feel like I'm just a woman.Transition is temporary, by definition. You will be female afterward, and you always have been, always will be a girl/woman. Transition is just the process of pulling down the facade you've been hiding behind and revealing the real person underneath. This is partly why I just can't imagine putting up a new, albeit prettier, one (fake past) after getting rid of that thing.
You don't even have to be proud of your TS-iness, just try be okay with it. Self-loathing is no fun.