Funny thing is I wanted to be just like my Dad. I looked up to him more than anyone in the world. He was a Engineer at IBM, he worked for IBM on the Saturn V rockets that went to the moon, his picture is on a microfiche on the moon as I type. He could fix anything in the world with his two bare hands and the right tools. I think he was an athlete in High School. He went to the University of Oklahoma. He had 5 kids and put them all through college when his own parents didn't graduate from college themselves.
Well I pretty accomplished a lot of things he did. I set out to do all those things. Things changed a bit in college when I failed my first engineering class so I switch to Landscape Architecture. I think that is when I started to fly my own destiny. Some of us don't realize we wanted to be something different all along, our role models were good, they just don't always suit what is best for us sometimes and we will chase others dreams before finding our own.
I am now a Licensed Architect in 2 states, father of two wonderful kids and I will put them through college someday, I am a healthy happy person, and that is most important. That is what I really wanted all along, and I was not truly happy those first 39 years, no matter how good my life was.
This is my life now and it is what I want to be, forget the past and what I thought I wanted to be.
Jessica