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Did you know as a child?

Started by Jasmine.m, May 27, 2010, 08:41:28 PM

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Jasmine.m

I suppose I could say that I've always known that I wasn't quite the right gender. For as long as I can remember, there's been these parts of me that were inexplicably wrong. One example that comes to mind is going shirtless around the neighborhood or while swimming. While the other little boys seemed more then happy to get out of their shirts to run around in the sun or water, I have *always* hated taking mine off. In fact, I still do to this day. I used to get teased about it so much...

I mentioned this to a FTM boy and he said he was the exact opposite!

So I wonder what experiences others may have had?
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Carolyn

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Farm Boy

Yes and no.  When I was a kid I wasn't aware of the anatomical differences between boys and girls, so my birth gender didn't bother me.  But I always expected to grow up to be a man, or at least I was convinced that I wouldn't grow up to have a female figure, and I wanted to be a fireman, policeman, etc. and I always pretended to be male characters from books and movies.  It wasn't so much a conscious "I'm in the wrong body, I want a male body" as it was I just never considered being a girl character.
Started T - Sept. 19, 2012
Top surgery - Jan. 16, 2017
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Dryad

I.. Didn't know. And to me, that was a really big 'didn't.' :P
I didn't know why I wasn't a girl, really. I asked, and asked.. As soon as I could form the sentences.
I had a near bizarre obsession with reproduction, as a small child. Not with the act, but with the process. I desperately wanted to find out why I wasn't born a girl.
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cynthialee

Yes. Age 9 I knew for a fact. Before the fateful day I learned the word transsexual I didn't know what was wrong with me I just knew I was very odd, but as soon as I saw my first talk show on transwomen it clicked and I knew without any doubt. (just took me 32 years to do something about it.)
Yes I played with girl toys preferably and prefered girls to boys at all times but alowing myself to think I might be a girl was not going to happen until I had the vocabulary for it.
So it is said that if you know your enemies and know yourself, you can win a hundred battles without a single loss.
If you only know yourself, but not your opponent, you may win or may lose.
If you know neither yourself nor your enemy, you will always endanger yourself.
Sun Tsu 'The art of War'
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sneakersjay

I always knew I was male, even sandwiched between two sisters and lumped as 'the girls' I just wanted to do fun boy stuff.  I wasn't aware of the anatomical differences until I saw a boy peeing. Then it was wait, what?  I'm missing something!  When someone asked me (around age 10) if I was 'developing' (meaning boobs) I was MORTIFIED.  It went downhill from there.


Jay


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confused

actually i didn't give it much thinking , i was just being me , avoiding being picked at by other kids for doing 'girly' stuff and hanging around with girls and playing 'their' games . although for some reason i don't know/remember my mom used to put me in dresses until i was 5 or so , and then i remember my surprise when i was told that this wasn't what i was supposed to wear
started to realize when boys and girls bodies started to look different (i.e 11 yo or so)
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hkgurl1480

My earliest recollection of knowing something wasn't right and acting on it was about age 4.  I also learnt at that age to hide it.  By age 10 i had put a name to it.  And like Cynthialee it has taken me another 29 years to do something about it.
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kyril

Yes, I absolutely knew by age 3-4. Reading was what did it for me - I always, invariably identified as and imagined myself as the male character. I couldn't be a girl in my head if I tried. I couldn't imagine growing up to be a woman.

The lack of certain anatomy reared its head during potty training and again repeatedly through my childhood. And I was totally mortified by my breasts. But really it just always came back to not being able to see myself as a woman. Women were foreign to me.


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LordKAT

age 3 for me, I got hit with it real hard in head start.
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JessieMH

"felt like it" @ age 4
"knew I wanted to be a girl for sure" @ age 7
"oh, it can happen, its called a transsexual" @ age 9

... yeah, watched WAY to much Discovery channel when I was little xD
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Samantha_Peterson

Started feeling weird at about age 8 or 10....probably earlier but I can't remember much of anything before 7....

Found out 3 months ago that it was possible.....
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FairyGirl

yes, I knew. Still it's painful to remember it over and over.
Girls rule, boys drool.
If I keep a green bough in my heart, then the singing bird will come.
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Jeatyn

had no idea there was a name or a cure for it until i was 18, just thought I was weird, and had a fleeting thought of "wish i was a boy"
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Stella Blue

From my memory, yes I did sorta... I knew something but I wasn't sure what it was. I've lived a really sheltered life... even sheltering myself from my own feelings....
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Ashley Allison

When I was younger I would fantasize about, looking back on it, completely female situations... Whether it love, dressing up, etc. there were times when it was distinctly feminine.  There is even a video of me, when I was around 3 or 4, trying to breast feed a teddy bear.  Those experiences started what felt like a cascade of traits inside me, events in my life unfolded, and here I am today.  I remember when I was getting the birds and the bees talk and was greatly disappointed that I would not experience a period.  Though I didn't directly know at the time, my feelings told me later on. 
Fly this girl as high as you can
Into the wild blue
Set me free
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Silver

Not really until puberty. I liked going shirtless, but they made me stop. I don't know if it was so much a male thing as it was just more comfortable on those hot 120 degree F days.

I don't think I was even really aware of gender until I hit puberty. Not fun at all. If there's one thing I don't want to relive, it's that.

Edit: I always just sort of assumed I'd grow into a man. Funny how I didn't really think about it. Just thought I'd be like my father, I looked up to him.
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Stella Blue

Quote from: forallittook on May 28, 2010, 12:24:43 AM
When I was younger I would fantasize about, looking back on it, completely female situations... Whether it love, dressing up, etc. there were times when it was distinctly feminine.

I can relate to this, I can only explain it as a memory of a feeling... if that makes sense at all haha. Also random vivid memories of fantasizing... even particular instances at a young age.
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rejennyrated

Yes another age 3 to 5 one... can't put an exact age on it, for obvious reasons, but I know that I first "came out" to my mother in a Clarkes shoe shop in Kensington High Street of all places and that it was well before I started school.

The trouble is I was a very determined little person back then and despite my parents best efforts at containment, efforts which were hampered when my father died of cancer, it seemed that once I had decided that that was what I was going to be there was nothing they could do to prevent me from making my feelings known to anyone who would listen.

Early battle grounds were red girls shoes, longish hair, a kilt as part of my school uniform, and a party frock! Amazingly I won on all occacions.

Unlike most children of the time I thus grew up very "out" and ended being taken to an array of child psychologists one of whom fortunately decided that it was "just a phase" and that the best thing my mother could do would be to play along and make it "our little joke!" Because that way, she said, my mother, who was by then an only parent, would have a good strong emotional bond with me.

I think it also helped that my mother was a BBC radio producer who specialised in medical programmes and therefore had heard about this strange phenomenon of gender dysphoria. She had even inteviewed April Ashley!

Upshot was by the time my mother remarried I was at one of the most advanced and avante garde boarding schools in the country where I was being allowed to grow up openly "in between" genders, and my step father, who was not quite so sympathetic, felt it unwise to interfere. Thus the only hassle I had to face was the occasional sarcastic comment from him.
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Cindy

I'm another who knew from as soon as I had realisation. I knew I was a girl. Didn't know I wasn't for a while. In early puberty confronted my parents why my breasts weren't developing and why wasn't I starting periods. School was hell, I thought everyone thought like me, found out the hard way that boys didn't think like me. I was talking to a friend today that I was in an all male CB school where there was one girl; as far as I knew. He laughed.

Love to go back to a school reunion with a flame thrower; not for everyone, I would like a lot of them to see me and realise what I am, but a few special individuals I could happily introduce them to pain. They after all introduced it to me :'(

Cindy
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