what is the difference between a very feminine man and an androgyne or between a masculine female and an androgyne?
please don't be offended by the things that i write
i read a lot of times that there is not only men and women, there is also something in between. but if we talk about gender identity there is only male or female. i don't want to offend someone, but this is what i think at the moment. some male people would say they are androgyne because they like romantic movies, their body language is very feminine or/and they don't like the typical men stuff. but all these things aren't things that defines a gender. there is no allmigthy rule that says "only girls are allowed to... and only boys are allowed to...". it is our culture that says men shouldn't wear make up or women shouldn't drink beer or whatever and gender isn't a cultural thing . so if someone says he likes "female things" and "male things" why isn't he only a guy who likes this type of thinks or clothes? why does he identify as androgyne.
again: i don't want to offend someone or say that he/she shouldn't identify as androgyne!
everything i wrote are just some thoughts that are in my mind.
the paradoxical is that i would identify as androgyne and i myself don't know why i identify as androgyne and not as a man with different interests and character traits
so i hope you understand what i mean and can help me to clear my mind.

Basically, say you have a female body. You can be as masculine as you like within that body, but if you feel female, you are female. Simplest way I can explain it. 

I think it boils down to...if you know yourself well...and you say (preferably out loud) "I am a woman" and/or "I am a man" How do those things feel when you say them. Does it fit? Does it feel right? If not....try "I am an androgyn"...see how that fits. It it rings true like a bell...then I'd have to wager there ARE more than just "male" and "female" experiences and gender identities.

Ignore everything that society says what a man or woman is.  Just try to put it out of your mind.

Whatever is left should hopefully be your answer.  It may take a while to make sense of it or figure it out, though.

For me, I definitely feel like a dude.  By society's standards, I am probably an androgynous one.

I consider myself an andro because I don't identify with either male or female more than the other. It's almost troublesome for me because I never feel more masculine or feminine. I date both men and women, but neither feel more "right," I dress in solid colors that are neither very feminine imo, and most of my friends can't decide if I act more like a guy or a girl; however,  like you said, what really makes a guy or a girl? (glad you asked about the fem and mas. qualities)

I guess an adrogyne, to me, is someone who can't really identify as either, not both.

hope that helps,
Carl/y

Lucaluca, I'm going to have to start this reply the same way you did: I don't intend to offend you.
Fact is, that if I were to reply to your question it would be the same answer I gave to your previous threads.
To explain; it seems to me you're recycling the same question over and over again; 'what is an androgyne'
and I figure that has to do with your own insecurity; your doubt whether you are or are not an androgyne.

Of course the choice is yours; you can pop the same question every thread and get the same answer or
you can read the threads already there and then express why you're not sure based on your own, individual
situation.

@no_id
you are right. i am totally confused. one day i think i know the answer who i am and the next day i don't know it. but i don't know what i should do to calm me down. i just don't know where i belong to and know one knows the answer, me neither 

Quote from: lucaluca on May 28, 2010, 05:27:35 AM
@no_id
you are right. i am totally confused. one day i think i know the answer who i am and the next day i don't know it. but i don't know what i should do to calm me down. i just don't know where i belong to and know one knows the answer, me neither 

As far as I know, and in my opinion, there's no need to 'get' the whole picture right away... You can work your way towards the big picture step-by-step by tackling small things at a time. Figure out the things that bother you and deal with them one at a time. Experiment, learn, see what works for you and of course: take a deep breath... There's no need to go 'I'm this' or 'I'm that' - that's not the way it works for most people.

There is what is between your legs - that's your sex.

Then there is what is between your ears - that's your gender.

Note that the two do not always coincide.

Now, if you think of gender as a spectrum, with "male" on one end, and "female" on the other, an androgyne person's sense of gender is somewhere between the two.  It may even be off the spectrum altogether.

Only you can say where on that spectrum you personally fall.

Quote from: riven1 on May 28, 2010, 03:59:36 PM
There is what is between your legs - that's your sex.

Then there is what is between your ears - that's your gender.

Note that the two do not always coincide.

Now, if you think of gender as a spectrum, with "male" on one end, and "female" on the other, an androgyne person's sense of gender is somewhere between the two.  It may even be off the spectrum altogether.

Only you can say where on that spectrum you personally fall.

do you think there's a spectrum, riven? I've always wondered if ppl who considered the idea of a spectrum thought it was a simple, linear  "male to female" spectrum, or more like the European Political spectrum (keep in mind, the following picture is mainly for laughs, but can also be seriously discussed).

Quote from: Carl E. Shy on May 28, 2010, 04:30:09 PM
do you think there's a spectrum, riven?

I think that a spectrum is one of the easier ways to explain to cis people what an androgyne is. We are different from other TG people because it is not easy to pigeon hole us - we come in many "colors and flavors". I float freely on the spectrum, sometimes more on the boy end of it, and sometimes more on the girl end of it. So yes, i definitely think a spectrum applies.

I definitly think it's *easiest* to describe it as a spectrum in the linear....though I'm not sure that's the *best* way to describe. Someone (here...I believe) mentioned the idea of a *web* instead of a spectrum. The spiders web has strong anchor threads which are most often traveled upon...but there are other threads connecting...which would help us explain those who are more of a nuetrois identity....though I digress and this isn't the thread for that.

Luca luca...first and foremost...breath. I REALLY DO understand how heavily this gender thing can weigh on you. I also understand the feeling of not being able to think of ANYTHING else until you have an exact answer for your gender feelings. Hmmm...perhaps a new thread explaining my views on the different ways we can express and/or change our sex...might be in order. (or it may confuse! Eh. We'll likely have a good conversation...either way  )

Think of a sphere, with north and south poles. They are the 'typical' binary ends of female and male. Now place everything else you can think of, in the gender spectrums, somewhere on the surface. Doesn't really matter where, just somewhat spread out. You could be somewhere in between several different things. Or maybe you're just one thing.

Now think about the inside of the sphere, the space there. Thats where an adrogyne is. In a spot or Bouncing from one place to another or Floating freely. Somewhere in there...

JUST A QUICK UODATE

after i thought about this stuff for mounth, i finally know where i belong to i don't know what i could write, but i wanted you to know it