i went to see my gp today to tell her how i feel and that i want to be a woman and it was so hard.It wasnt my usual gp and i told her everything i could and ask asked me questions and she said i was brave for going and talking to her about this and she said she knows how hard it must be and she is going to refer me to a specilist she also said that if i ever need to talk or need a longer chat about to go and see her.

before i went in i was so nervous and worried and my heart was racing.
now its been quite a few hours since i saw her and i feel very emotional and i wish my mum was here and some how iv got to talk to her about this i really need her right now but i bet if i tell her everything she might get upset.

I sort of told her i wanted to be a woman and all she said is that im confusses and i will end up alone and she said that i wouldnt want to be a woman.maybe if i told her how i feel and why and tell her ic seen my doctor and the doctor is going to help me then maybe she will understand i dont know.

my gp said i will prob have to see some sort of thrapist to determin what im feeling is true.
she said it might be becuase i was bullied in the past or she said it could be that i genuinly feel that i was born the wrong sex.
so i guess thats a step in the right direction.

Congratulations.  I remember being just as nervous when I first told me doctor a little over a year ago.  As for the therapist, what the doctor meant is that the therapist will want to make sure your reasons are genuine.  Be prepared though.  One thing I have heard about over there in the UK is they will kind of jerk you around in order to get rid of the people who aren't so serious.  So be prepared to be on some long waiting lists.  But definitely a big congratulations for taking a first step. 

I don't know if they call transsexuals crossdressers over there (although I thought they were referred to as transgendered in the uk), but you posted this under crossdresser talk.

Melissa

sorry i posted it in wrong section.I will be perpared becuase no matter what they dp and no matter how long the waiting list is i will stick at it becuase i believe that what i feel is true and its gone on for to long to be just a phase or anything like that.

Hi there, tammygirl2

I'm a post-op MtF TS living in London; I had all of my treatment managed through the GIC at Charing Cross Hospital.

It is true that certain GICs in the the UK will be tough with you and will make things difficult. But this is to test your motivation and also to ration their intake of patients. As a public service using public money, they can't offer an unlimited service to everyone. But let me assure you of this: if you follow their rules, you will get there in the end.

Of course, you're welcome to go private but not all of us can afford that.

If I could give one piece of advice to all TSs just starting out, start your facial electrolysis as soon as possible. When that's well underway, it makes everything that follows so much easier.

And know that you are not alone.

I think it will be the GIC at Charing Cross Hospital i will be refered to as i think its the nearest to me in kent uk.
Iv put some money away from things like getting my face hair removed and travel costs etc.Iv been thinking of buying that laser hair removal thing from argos it removes the beard hair and other body hair and can remove hair permenetly think its costs £100 not sure if its any good.

just hope all works out and i hope my appointment will come through the post soon.

Do not, I repeat, do not get anything from Argos for hair removal. It will be a complete waste of money and might even damage your skin.

Electrolysis is the only guaranteed form of permanent hair removal, laser has not yet been proven to be permanent although good results can come from it. I used both. Both of these methods should be only used by a qualified practitioner, not attempted at home by yourself.

As far as Charing Cross goes, you have to follow through on what they tell you. Changing your name by deed poll/statutory declaration is a good start. Living and presenting yourself as female 24/7 is what they want to see... you're going to have to tell your Mum because she's going to know sooner or later anyway. You might be surprised; she might not take it too bad and might end up helping in the end.

Quote from: Stormy Weather on November 24, 2006, 11:14:03 AM
Electrolysis is the only guaranteed form of permanent hair removal, laser has not yet been proven to be permanent although good results can come from it. I used both. Both of these methods should be only used by a qualified practitioner, not attempted at home by yourself.

Laser is supposed to result in at least a permanent reduction of hair and I believe the remainder can be cleaned up through electrolysis.  I am getting laser myself using LightSheer diode laser (one of the better ones) and after 3 treatments it definitely reduced the amount of hair so I could pass without any problems.  I have had 2 more treatments since then and it keeps getting to be less and less.  I believe the most cost effective way of hair removal is a combination of laser and electrolysis.  The combination of how much o feach does depend on hair color, since laser doesn't work on anything but dark (unless you go with the new aurora system).

Melissa

QuoteAs far as Charing Cross goes, you have to follow through on what they tell you. Changing your name by deed poll/statutory declaration is a good start. Living and presenting yourself as female 24/7 is what they want to see... you're going to have to tell your Mum because she's going to know sooner or later anyway. You might be surprised; she might not take it too bad and might end up helping in the end.

I dont think i can live female 24/7 i dont think my parents might not allow it.
If it comes to it i will have to look at other options like moving out.
It all seems like its going to be a struggle and theres so many problems im going to come across but one way or another i will do it.
i thought today was really hard and i still feel emotional about it even now so god knows what its going to be like trying to go out and also living as a female 24/7 i think its going to be really hard but iv got to do this if i want to be happy and be the woman i want to be.

i know for a fact that my mums cousins that i visit wont want to know me and im close to them and they love me but they admitted they cant stand to be around men who dress as woman and they talk about it as if theres something wrong with it but what they dont understand is what i feels like.I think if they only knew then maybe they would see things differently.

Quote from: tammygirl2 on November 24, 2006, 04:51:20 PM
It all seems like its going to be a struggle and theres so many problems im going to come across but one way or another i will do it.

No-one here will say it's easy, no-one will say that you're not going to get hurt at some point, but no-one will have all the answers that suit you.

I had to leave many relationships behind and make many sacrifices but it was all worth it to feel right. The alternative of not dealing with things is far worse as many here will tell you. Don't forget that it's your life, not your mum's cousins, not your parents. You have the right to be happy.

I don't know how old you are but you might find it useful to find others like yourself because you're going to need support. Don't see it as one long, hard journey; it can all seem a bit daunting otherwise. One step at a time, babes.

Quote from: tammygirl2 on November 24, 2006, 04:51:20 PM
i thought today was really hard and i still feel emotional about it even now so god knows what its going to be like trying to go out and also living as a female 24/7 i think its going to be really hard but iv got to do this if i want to be happy and be the woman i want to be.

For me, coming out to my GP for the first time was really hard.  Living my first day fulltime as a woman was a piece of cake.  By the time you are ready, you will realize that coming out is proabably one of the toughest parts of transition.

Quote from: Stormy Weather on November 24, 2006, 05:17:42 PM
I don't know how old you are...

She is 23 years old.

Melissa

thanks guys for your replys i just posted a reply in coming out forum as i talked to my mum about how i feel so i psoted it in coming out.

Hiee Tammy,

  I hope what I say may be of help to you. As you are just begining this journey I am going to make the assumption that it is the proper one for you to be making. The starting point I would call the point where one begins thier physical transition. The ending point (if there really is one) is after one has completed SRS is living full time in thier appropriate gender and has attended to ALL the appropriate legallities ie name change,gender change etc. From start to finish is Transition as I am sure you are aware of. There are many many steps to take along transition. When you are aware of those steps and are comfortable with taking them is the proper time to begin transition. Be aware of the finish and what is in front of you but stay focused on each little step you must take along the way and I expect it will be somewhat smooth. That is not to say easy, but hopefully many of the major bumps can be avoided. Plan your transiton as to what you feel you need to do to arrive at the end and in the position you want to be in when you get there. Don't jump into this blindly or you will undoubtedly be setting yourself up for needless turmoil further down the road OK.

Byee,
  Brina

Quote from: brina on November 25, 2006, 05:43:54 PM
The starting point I would call the point where one begins thier physical transition.

I thought the starting point was when you began therapy.   Does facial hair removal count as physical transition since there are men that have beards removed?

Melissa

The first step to transition is self-acceptance, and Tammy has already done that, for she is currently seeing a gender therapist. After self-acceptance, the next step is therapy, and then you go up this ladder until you get to the top...


                       


tinkerbell

Quote from: Tinkerbell on November 26, 2006, 02:05:55 AM
The first step to transition is self-acceptance, and Tammy has already done that, for she is currently seeing a gender therapist. After self-acceptance, the next step is therapy, and then you go up this ladder until you get to the top...


                       

Ya know, I'd be a BIT more comfortable with this illustration if the top step of SRS, ya know, actually LED somewhere other than a drop off the cliff, lol...

Hiee Kate,

  LOL that is quite interesting and also the fact that the graphic indicates a raise in position when in reality transition usually denotes a depreciation in society as to status.

  Melissa why the cheap shot? Physical transition is generally inclusive of having had or having thearpy, although I for one don't think that everyone needs therapy. I was simply trying to say that transition is a span of time that one needs to have a good understanding of and accepting of all the consequences of before jumping into it. It seems to me that a good many T's end up shedding way to many tears along the road due to jumping in with both feet and not havng the slightest idea as to how deep the water actually is. A good many of them claim to be seeing 'Therapists' as well, hmm go figure. The second thought I was trying to put forward was to have a clear understanding of what you want to be when you finally emerge at the other end. Keep that image in mind during transition but stay focused on each step along the way lest you trip over some obstacle and NEEDLESSLY hurt yourself.

Byee,
  Brina

Quote from: brina on November 26, 2006, 08:46:49 AM
Melissa why the cheap shot?

It wasn't a cheap shot.  I was genuinely curious what you meant by that.  Thanks for answering my question.  I mean we ARE still allowed to have questions about this even where I'm at, aren't we?  Or is it just seen as an attack at this point and I shouldn't bother asking more questions?

Melissa

Hiee Melissa,

  I have already explained myself in this context in several other threads, to which you have made posts to and therefor I would have thought you to be understanding of where I was coming from. In that light YES I did perceive it as a potential attack. In hindsight though perhaps you did not bother to read my posts in those threads and therefor would not have known where I was coming from.

Byee,
  Brina

Quote from: brina on November 26, 2006, 11:24:12 AM
In hindsight though perhaps you did not bother to read my posts in those threads and therefor would not have known where I was coming from.

That's exactly right.  My time has been stretched very thin lately and I am only able to keep up on a handful of posts.

Melissa

Quote from: Kate on November 26, 2006, 02:40:36 AM

Ya know, I'd be a BIT more comfortable with this illustration if the top step of SRS, ya know, actually LED somewhere other than a drop off the cliff, lol...

LOL.....yeah, the way I see it though....once you get to the top...an angel picks you up and takes you to paradise, not because you die but because that is how it feels...

tinkerbell