Sorry for jumping in late on this one Kimberly... Just wanted to say I feel like I am in the same boat with you.  Being in a real initial part of my transition, I am constantly asking myself the what if question, especially with dating.  I keep having fantasies about finding the right guy who will love me for all that I am and am not.  It scares me, especially seeing my physical appearance right now.  I don't want to be lonely because I transitioned.  But, I think at this point that prospect of loneliness is not going to hold me back.  I need to do this for myself, even if love may be hard to come by.  It is inspiring to read the stories of girls who have found someone right on here, gives a little hope   I feel like that there may come a time in my transition where I will feel enough confidence to know that it is possible.  But for the moment, it is just really scary.

Quote from: Virginia Marie on September 14, 2010, 09:38:20 PM
They said they were not convinced? That means they like you but want to make sure you want the job

If you do want the job... Call them back, even go in and tell (politely) them that you will call or be there every day until they are convinced

Well I don't think so cuz they said they're just going to interview others. I'm going to call next week when the manager is back to ask what was wrong exactly, so that I can learn and grow from this experience, because finding work is severely crucial to me.

Quote from: AprilDawn on September 14, 2010, 09:46:03 PM
Good advice, Virginia! Maybe they wanted to see what you would do?

At any rate, I know things will turn around for you =] just keep your chin up, smile, and go in there as if you know you are the right person for the job.

Good advice from Izumi too! =]

Hugs Kimberly!

<3 MOM heehee

Thanks momma!! I really hope something turns around for me. I'm tired of feeling like nothing is going right. I did have another interview today and she said she did like me and was going to give her manager good feedback for me. Fingers crossed.

Quote from: forallittook on September 15, 2010, 01:07:24 AM
Sorry for jumping in late on this one Kimberly... Just wanted to say I feel like I am in the same boat with you.  Being in a real initial part of my transition, I am constantly asking myself the what if question, especially with dating.  I keep having fantasies about finding the right guy who will love me for all that I am and am not.  It scares me, especially seeing my physical appearance right now.  I don't want to be lonely because I transitioned.  But, I think at this point that prospect of loneliness is not going to hold me back.  I need to do this for myself, even if love may be hard to come by.  It is inspiring to read the stories of girls who have found someone right on here, gives a little hope   I feel like that there may come a time in my transition where I will feel enough confidence to know that it is possible.  But for the moment, it is just really scary.

Ahh don't worry about being late haha

sorry for the comfussing message i just read it back again and I also got very confused, the point is, straight guy is not a synonim of only  aguy that is looking for genetic girls and thats it,
the other point is if you want to live as a girl all your life as i can see, then you have the same possiblitieas as anyone else from a straigh guy, just dont enphasize to much the transitioning story of your life but dont hide it, that will kill the image and romance, no one is stupid in order to know if you are tg or not, i mean you are so pretty but obiously you wont be able o hide the truth for long time and not to be told by your body look even if it is perfect but by other things that shows the truth, voice, tone, how you look to the people, how you react, how you move etc.

Be yourself and have fun, of course be picky and choose the right guy at its right time.

Quote from: KimberlyJean on September 14, 2010, 09:28:33 PM
I'm willing to take any job, just for some reason no one will hire me. I had an interview last week and I went in for a small shift so they could see how I'd work and I got turned down. Why? They weren't convinced. I did nothing wrong, they just weren't convinced. Whatever that means. It's just really frustrating when I'm looking for a job for more than a year and nothing, all my friends apply to like one or two places and they have a job they love. I don't get it. Like it's bad enough I was born in the wrong body but why can't I at least get the opportunity to fix it? I'm willing to work! Well I had another interview today, she said she liked me and she would give her managers good feedback and they'll make the decision. So I hope that means something

Izumi has excellent points, there is little I can think of to add. Job interviews are tricky business, sometimes it is really necessary to show that you are unlike the other competitirs for the job. For example, I used to deliver my letter of application and CV in person. Also little things like arranging the layout of a letter in a non standard way will grasp their attention. Little things can make a large difference.

Never give up, both in your professional life and in love.
Like Virginia wrote, calling a day or 2 later is mostly regarded as positive.

Quote from: Octavianus on September 15, 2010, 02:13:43 PM
Izumi has excellent points, there is little I can think of to add. Job interviews are tricky business, sometimes it is really necessary to show that you are unlike the other competitirs for the job. For example, I used to deliver my letter of application and CV in person. Also little things like arranging the layout of a letter in a non standard way will grasp their attention. Little things can make a large difference.

Never give up, both in your professional life and in love.
Like Virginia wrote, calling a day or 2 later is mostly regarded as positive.

I usually call. BUT I have great news. I got an offer this morning and I took it of course! I'm just waiting on an email with my employee id and I'll do a 3 hr training thing online. I'm an event specialist, not 100% sure what it is, but it's 11 dollars and hour and about 24 hours a week it looks like!

Yaaaaaaaaaaay Kim!!!  Score!!!

I've been hoping for something good to happen up for you 

Thanks Virginia! I've been hoping the same thing haha. I really hope it works out!! I'm a bit scared because I feel like it won't, just because I don't know lol!

Just be positive, optimistic and do your best 

That's how I'm trying to be. Today has rocked haha. I'm just dying to start hormones and electrolysis!!

Quote from: KimberlyJean on September 15, 2010, 07:10:12 PM
Today has rocked haha. I'm just dying to start hormones and electrolysis!!

You can do it  Make everyday ROCK 

I wish I could make everyday rock lol!

Here is my experience:

I have a boyfriend soon for 2 years (soon = December).

My boyfriend is a straight guy and knows anything I know about me. He is awesome, supportive, loving, considers me as a most wonderful person and unless I was so whiny and hating some stuff in me so much, I am pretty sure that my little health problem this community knows all to well would have probably been completely forgotten.

Thing is, it is irelevant to someone who loves you. Once someone loves you it's just like "Ok.. so you had the pox when you were 3.", it is simply not there. Except for you - the people most bothered by this are not the people around us, they are the people with it. Seeing it all the time, even when it cannot be seen anymore, whining about it, being afraid of it and of what other people would say.

I live in a really small town, it's called a kibbutz (Israeli!) - EVERYONE in the kibbutz knows because there is no chance when they are only about 150-200 families in a tiny beautiful place. Well, no one cares, better, people are supportive and complement. I even started working in the dinning room which is a meeting place for everyone in the kibbutz, almost everyone comes to eat there every day and they see me either at maintaince or as the cashier. Except for a few silly but not bad people who can't do 1+1, everyone complements and treats me as just any other girl, even more special - they tell me I achieved something amazing. The few silly people, well some of them changed their attidue with time or because someone else asked them and one or two I even kindly asked "Could you please try to respect me?" a person once said "Huh, what?" and I just said "you know, just take a look and try to understand", he then apologized and changed ever since. I think there is just one truly idiot person left, but I don't care, everyone knows he is an idiot even beyond this

Outside, no one needs to respect anything because no body knows. And as far as I know if you truly make really good friendship with a guy and only then move on to the next step, well, if you didn't feel safe telling him everything about you already then maybe you shouldn't consider him as an option for anything more yet because you don't feel safe and you don't trust him. I can understand that sometimes the reason might be different, instead it would be that you told him everything BUT that.. but if you know him as well as you should, you should probably know what his reaction will be once you use your instincts and not focus on your fears.

Thing is, at one point you are just like anyone else and the ghost or shadow of this problem, only you can see, even if it is not there anymore. And most people don't really care once you tell them, because they care about you. If it changes anything then there are two options: either they are stupid or their reaction is confused - So don't lose hope on them yet! People sometimes can say things they don't mean just because of norms and confusion taking over them, give them time if that is the case and give them some space.. Then see if it is really final but remember, they might be as afraid to approach you again as you might be, due to anger or disappointment at your case.

Congrats Kimberly! I'm so happy for you! *HUGS!!*

I hope this is a turning point for you, and things start to smooth out for you =] we all deserve happiness, no matter what our life path may be.

I knew crossing my fingers, toes, and butt-cheeks would help =p

<3 Momma =]

Quote from: Myself on September 15, 2010, 11:33:20 PM
Here is my experience:

I have a boyfriend soon for 2 years (soon = December).

My boyfriend is a straight guy and knows anything I know about me. He is awesome, supportive, loving, considers me as a most wonderful person and unless I was so whiny and hating some stuff in me so much, I am pretty sure that my little health problem this community knows all to well would have probably been completely forgotten.

Thing is, it is irelevant to someone who loves you. Once someone loves you it's just like "Ok.. so you had the pox when you were 3.", it is simply not there. Except for you - the people most bothered by this are not the people around us, they are the people with it. Seeing it all the time, even when it cannot be seen anymore, whining about it, being afraid of it and of what other people would say.

I live in a really small town, it's called a kibbutz (Israeli!) - EVERYONE in the kibbutz knows because there is no chance when they are only about 150-200 families in a tiny beautiful place. Well, no one cares, better, people are supportive and complement. I even started working in the dinning room which is a meeting place for everyone in the kibbutz, almost everyone comes to eat there every day and they see me either at maintaince or as the cashier. Except for a few silly but not bad people who can't do 1+1, everyone complements and treats me as just any other girl, even more special - they tell me I achieved something amazing. The few silly people, well some of them changed their attidue with time or because someone else asked them and one or two I even kindly asked "Could you please try to respect me?" a person once said "Huh, what?" and I just said "you know, just take a look and try to understand", he then apologized and changed ever since. I think there is just one truly idiot person left, but I don't care, everyone knows he is an idiot even beyond this

Outside, no one needs to respect anything because no body knows. And as far as I know if you truly make really good friendship with a guy and only then move on to the next step, well, if you didn't feel safe telling him everything about you already then maybe you shouldn't consider him as an option for anything more yet because you don't feel safe and you don't trust him. I can understand that sometimes the reason might be different, instead it would be that you told him everything BUT that.. but if you know him as well as you should, you should probably know what his reaction will be once you use your instincts and not focus on your fears.

Thing is, at one point you are just like anyone else and the ghost or shadow of this problem, only you can see, even if it is not there anymore. And most people don't really care once you tell them, because they care about you. If it changes anything then there are two options: either they are stupid or their reaction is confused - So don't lose hope on them yet! People sometimes can say things they don't mean just because of norms and confusion taking over them, give them time if that is the case and give them some space.. Then see if it is really final but remember, they might be as afraid to approach you again as you might be, due to anger or disappointment at your case.

Wow great story!! <3

Quote from: AprilDawn on September 15, 2010, 11:58:32 PM
Congrats Kimberly! I'm so happy for you! *HUGS!!*

I hope this is a turning point for you, and things start to smooth out for you =] we all deserve happiness, no matter what our life path may be.

I knew crossing my fingers, toes, and butt-cheeks would help =p

<3 Momma =]

I knew it would too, eventually and it did!! Thanks mommyy

Kimberly, Im very happy to hear about your new job. Just remember, if you do good, they may give you more hours. I have my fingers crossed that you also find someone special for you.   

Thanks Angela!! Love you!!!

Will i prefer str8 guys cause i've tried giving a chance to a gay guy but he clearly said he prefer me living with it and by it i mean that thing i hate and wanna change

what surprises  me is that str8 men know how to treat a t lady and make her feel special even though most of them know nothing about trans people.

Quote from: ZeZe on September 18, 2010, 04:53:40 PM
Will i prefer str8 guys cause i've tried giving a chance to a gay guy but he clearly said he prefer me living with it and by it i mean that thing i hate and wanna change

what surprises  me is that str8 men know how to treat a t lady and make her feel special even though most of them know nothing about trans people.

I know! Some people have suggested dating gay guys and it's like uhh.....I'm not a boy. I may look like one right now but I don't identify as one so I'm not going to get involved with someone who likes men. Nothing wrong with gay guys, but I'm not a boy so it'd be a waste and if it got serious, we'd both end up hurt.

People may find this stupid, but this is what I did. From the time I discovered I was a woman, up till I went post op I stopped dating. Each  person just do what you think is right. It did help that I wasnt much of a dating person to begin with as a man.

I notice many folks don't understand the difference between a gay man and a trans woman

If I get into a relationship with a man I expect him to be a kind, decent man who will treat me like a lady

I want too feel proud to say "This is my man" and I want him to feel proud to say "This is my woman"