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Scared :(

Started by Britney♥Bieber, October 02, 2010, 09:35:11 PM

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Britney♥Bieber

Thanks Angela!! Love ya bb!! And thanks fluffy <3
and Melody I would love to keep in touch with you on our transition since we are starting hormones around the same time :) Feel free to message me! :D Good luck!! :D

tori319

I'd kill to be were your at right now but I do understand the fear of wanting something for so long and then being faced with it.Suddenly it seems to good to be true and you start worrying about all the things that could go wrong.
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Britney♥Bieber

Quote from: tori319 on October 03, 2010, 01:26:49 AM
I'd kill to be were your at right now but I do understand the fear of wanting something for so long and then being faced with it.Suddenly it seems to good to be true and you start worrying about all the things that could go wrong.

Omg you like took the words off of my key board! And hey I was where you were at one point, if you're like in therapy haha. Like when I first wanted to pursue transition I was like FML I'll never get in therapy. Then I found myself in therapy and I was like FML I'll never get on hormones. Now I'm on them and I'm like FML I'll never get srs. That's a few years away since I'm BROKE =/

Angela

Forgive me for asking , but when you legally change your name , are you going to be Britney or Kimberly ???
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Colleen Ireland

I think it's perfectly normal to be scared when facing any big change, and especially when the change is by your own decision, and at the moment it actually starts to happen.  And the thing is, this process has SO many long timelags, where you're basically waiting for something you know will happen at SOME point in the future, but you're not sure exactly when.  For instance, back in July I went to my GP to get a referral to the gender identity clinic at CAMH.  I was told they would contact me at some point, but I didn't know what form that contact would take or when.  Four weeks later, I got the intake questionnaire in the mail.  And I had a very intense moment of fear, because it had taken so long I'd pretty much stopped thinking about it, and then... BOOM.  Here it is - next step.  So I sent it in a week later, and I know that sometime they will contact me again to set up an appointment, but I don't know when - I think it could be anytime now.  And the appointment will be sometime in the new year.  So you get these Long lags where you're pretty much on your own - and mind you, I've been doing a lot on my own - but then when the next BIG step happens... BOOM.  There's that fear again.  My take:  it means you're sane.  Any sane person would be terrified to face these changes, especially when you're making the decisions that are driving it.  So... hang on, girl, and don't freak yourself out.  I predict you'll feel better about it in a week or so...

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Britney♥Bieber

Quote from: Angela Venetos on October 03, 2010, 06:49:41 AM
Forgive me for asking , but when you legally change your name , are you going to be Britney or Kimberly ???

Noo don't feel bad for asking or anything! Perfectly normal haha. I WAS going with Kimberly even though I've wanted to be Britney from the beginning. I'm going with Britney :D

Quote from: Colleen Ireland on October 03, 2010, 09:32:44 AM
I think it's perfectly normal to be scared when facing any big change, and especially when the change is by your own decision, and at the moment it actually starts to happen.  And the thing is, this process has SO many long timelags, where you're basically waiting for something you know will happen at SOME point in the future, but you're not sure exactly when.  For instance, back in July I went to my GP to get a referral to the gender identity clinic at CAMH.  I was told they would contact me at some point, but I didn't know what form that contact would take or when.  Four weeks later, I got the intake questionnaire in the mail.  And I had a very intense moment of fear, because it had taken so long I'd pretty much stopped thinking about it, and then... BOOM.  Here it is - next step.  So I sent it in a week later, and I know that sometime they will contact me again to set up an appointment, but I don't know when - I think it could be anytime now.  And the appointment will be sometime in the new year.  So you get these Long lags where you're pretty much on your own - and mind you, I've been doing a lot on my own - but then when the next BIG step happens... BOOM.  There's that fear again.  My take:  it means you're sane.  Any sane person would be terrified to face these changes, especially when you're making the decisions that are driving it.  So... hang on, girl, and don't freak yourself out.  I predict you'll feel better about it in a week or so...


Thanks Colleen! <3

Rosa

Quote from: itsbritney on October 02, 2010, 10:52:15 PM
I really don't know how I went so long thinking I was a fem gay guy! I don't get it at all haha

Britney, how did you get past that?  Would you mind if I PM'd you?  I think that you have already crossed some bridges that I am on.

Best wishes for your HRT.  Any change scares me - I think it is normal for everyone, but some people deal with change better than others.  Sometimes its difficult for me to picture myself living as a woman too, but the thought of being a wife, being able to feel pretty, and having a va jay jay is comforting.  Perhaps transitioning is not so much getting rid of all of our problems as it is getting rid of what we can't handle in exchange for new challenges that we can handle. 
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Britney♥Bieber

Quote from: Robertina on October 03, 2010, 11:25:56 AM
Britney, how did you get past that?  Would you mind if I PM'd you?  I think that you have already crossed some bridges that I am on.

Best wishes for your HRT.  Any change scares me - I think it is normal for everyone, but some people deal with change better than others.  Sometimes its difficult for me to picture myself living as a woman too, but the thought of being a wife, being able to feel pretty, and having a va jay jay is comforting.  Perhaps transitioning is not so much getting rid of all of our problems as it is getting rid of what we can't handle in exchange for new challenges that we can handle.

Yesss! Feel free to message me :D