lol I'm a huge passive teddybear but yeah it has caused problems and tends to attract the wrong people >_>;;

It depends.

When I'm with my girlfriend, I try to deal with things on an equals level and it pretty much works that way, but if she makes it clear that she doesn't have any preferences (e.i. as to what we discuss), I take charge.

With all others non-romantically:

Around women, I'm passive.

Around other guys, I'm extremely dominant and competitive, unless he's a clear authority figure I respect, then I back down and try to be a polite good boy.

I'm a very low key person, but when it comes to relationships I'm not passive at all.  Rather than being "dominant," I consider myself more protective, as I would prefer to spoil my partner rather than having them cater to me, if that makes any sense.  I'll admit to being very competitive, though.   

In terms of everyday life I'm not passive.  I would say I have some difficulties being assertive sometimes but am certainly not quiet and pretty much always have an opinion on stuff.

In sexual terms however I am very, very submissive.  I am in a BDSM relationship that I really enjoy and just love giving control to the other person.  This used to confuse me with my transness and was a factor in not discovering it for a while ... until I learned that submissive =/= a girl   

In general I try to be not passive so much as calm, just try and slide by without conflict. Although that's probably because I'm terrible when it comes to arguments or fights, since I pretty much lose it three seconds in.

But when it comes to sexual relations, I'm definitely dominant.

I'm passive/submissive in the sense that I like to be helpful to people, so I suppose that could be used to manipulate me in a way, but, I would certainly not be submissive if I were in a physical relationship with someone. I have never felt like I was submissive, or that I should be "dominated" in that way, which is why I think I never really dated anyone back when I was presenting as female. It would just be too conflicting. Honestly, even about a year ago I was still miffed at how women could have penetrative sex with men, because to me it just seemed so.. Weird. I understand now though, haha.
I got off-topic, but basically I'm passive when it comes to everyday stuff, like people asking me where we should go etc. and if people ask to borrow money I find it very hard to say no to them.

Well I'm kind of passive.

Best example of passive in the bunch.

Dominant.

Passive-aggressive. 

Quote from: emoboi on November 04, 2009, 09:31:12 PM
omg I this kid asked me for a dollar and i said i didnt have one because i only had one for me so i stuck the dollar in the vending machine and was deciding what to get and then this kid just walks up and starts punching in buttons and it's just like what are you doing and hes just like "what"  and but i didnt do anything about it i just walked away but it wasnt nice

Ok wow. I thought this topic was about being passive/dominate in the bedroom. There is a big difference between being a passive partner and being everyones doormat. You don't deserve to be treated badly. At the same time, if don't respect yourself you can't expect other people to. You got to stand up for yourself.

Quote from: Berren on November 18, 2010, 09:00:13 AM
I'm passive/submissive in the sense that I like to be helpful to people, so I suppose that could be used to manipulate me in a way

I got off-topic, but basically I'm passive when it comes to everyday stuff, like people asking me where we should go etc. and if people ask to borrow money I find it very hard to say no to them.

Me too.  I have been manipulated and used in the past due to my passive/helpful nature, and it's not a nice feeling to be screwed over for trying to be nice.  I can't help it though, because I feel like I'd rather help a "friend" and then be ditched than not help someone who really needs it.  Karma and all that, you know?  Besides, I'd just feel bad to say "no" to someone when it's within my capabilities to help them.

Relationship-wise, I'm dominant, though I switch. My (ftm) boyfriend is the opposite. Socially, we're both more introverted/passive - interestingly, though he's more socially confident, he's more likely to be passive in the face of confrontation. I'm somewhat socially phobic, but if someone does something confrontation worthy in public I'm inclined to start an argument/take a swing at them.

In the situation you mentioned... I probably would have shoved him away and gotten in his face about it. Unless he was younger kid. In which case, grab by shoulder, pull away, say "Dude- NOT COOL." There's a difference between being non-confrontational and letting complete strangers control you.

Quote from: Nikolai_S on November 18, 2010, 03:55:22 PM
Relationship-wise, I'm dominant, though I switch. My (ftm) boyfriend is the opposite. Socially, we're both more introverted/passive - interestingly, though he's more socially confident, he's more likely to be passive in the face of confrontation. I'm somewhat socially phobic, but if someone does something confrontation worthy in public I'm inclined to start an argument/take a swing at them.

In the situation you mentioned... I probably would have shoved him away and gotten in his face about it. Unless he was younger kid. In which case, grab by shoulder, pull away, say "Dude- NOT COOL." There's a difference between being non-confrontational and letting complete strangers control you.

Then you won't mind having that done to you by the guy confronted with your used and abandoned menstruation products. Interesting way of coping with social anxiety.

I have a friend whose just like you.  I don't get how she can be so calm under certain situations (like the one with the dollar and the kid).  Maybe it's a gift?  Haha.

Anyway, I'm a weird mix of both.  I'm dominant, but in a passive way.  I'm not very outspoken, but I do have strong opinions.  I'm generally quiet and will follow with whatever until I want to do something else or I get bored.  Relationship wise, I don't know. 

Quote from: Farm Boy on November 18, 2010, 03:53:12 PM
Me too.  I have been manipulated and used in the past due to my passive/helpful nature, and it's not a nice feeling to be screwed over for trying to be nice.  I can't help it though, because I feel like I'd rather help a "friend" and then be ditched than not help someone who really needs it.  Karma and all that, you know?  Besides, I'd just feel bad to say "no" to someone when it's within my capabilities to help them.

It isn't a nice feeling! Mainly though, people just lit on me (usually to borrow stuff) because they know I rarely say no. If I actually do end up saying no, then I just feel really awful for it afterwards.

QuoteThen you won't mind having that done to you by the guy confronted with your used and abandoned menstruation products. Interesting way of coping with social anxiety.

I'm assuming by this you've never heard of fight or flight, wherein a person in a stressful, aka "anxious" situation reacts with fight or flight. Lashing out at someone physically or verbally falls under that fight category and is in fact not indicative of someone who has good coping mechanisms in social situations.

And no, I'd have totally deserved it.

I'm a submissive basically but not by choice. I'm submissive in everything because I don't feel comfortable with myself so usually that makes me shy in social/sex situations. Maybe one day that'll change and I'll be a switch

I'm submissive, I'm passive. I've become this way because of the way others have treated me, perhaps because of my AS: when you have no idea if what you're saying is okay or not, it's best to stay silent. I have learnt to walk on eggshells around my mother, and this behaviour has leaked over to my interactions with other people. I seldom take initiative, but rather follow. I would probably apologize to the person stepping on my toes as well, and I tend to keep quiet about pretty much everything. I don't want to inconvenience anyone, I don't want to attract attention.

I am a wallflower, a quiet and shy person. However, I've become very outspoken in my new class, because I feel comfortable there.

I fight for assertive,.....but sometimes lose.

I guess I'm submissive/passive

it tends to be hard for me to make decisions or say how I really feel, I don't want to make anyone upset or anything like that.