I'm going to be as indirectly direct as I can be with my parents. I'm gonna come out to my mom, whom I don't live with so it won't be now.

I went and printed out two trans-related pamphlets and some other stuff about gender, to start the conversation. Just indirectly leave it where she can see it, or pass it to her.  I'm not a very calm person; I get nervous easily, so I'm not going to be direct about it at first..

Good luck Ribbons

I would suggest rather writing a letter which seems more direct and less passive aggressive.  A letter is how I came out to my mom.  It's good because as a nervous person myself I had time to fully think and plan what exactly I wanted to say. 

I'm a nervous wreck too, but I felt like this warranted a direct and heavy approach. I walked straight up to my mom and handed her a skirt. I told her I was more comfortable as a girl and she brushed me off. Apparently I didn't do it right because I went right back in the closet for 13 years.

Whatever you do, when you do it, make sure to do it and mean it. Really mean it. Don't let other people dictate who you are supposed to be. Sometimes your only option is rebirth by fire. Good luck!

May I make a suggestion or two??

  Coming out as Trans is, for lack of a better term, a big freakin' deal. I think that, at least with close family and friends, this is something that warrants a face-to-face conversation. Something that you're going to face is people not taking you seriously; those that might suggest that you're not really committed to transition.  It would be better if you start out by being very direct in your approach..... in person.  Save the letters and emails for folks that you don't see often. Talk to the person ahead of time and set aside an hour with them to "talk about something very important," when you won't be interrupted.

  Write down what you want to say and practice it in the mirror. Anticipate negative reactions and be ready to counter them.. with a smile. Take the stance that whoever you're coming out to may be confused and/or upset; be prepared to help them understand and be ready to walk away for the moment and continue the conversation after. Don't be adversarial. You should be the one in control of your coming out. Control yourself because you can't control the reactions you'll face.

  Don't assume that you've lost someone because of a poor, initial reaction. This Trans stuff takes awhile for some to get their hands around. Be patient. This process may carry out over several conversations (especially for parents.) Lastly, you might want to do a little better than pamphlets and buy a book... I'd suggest "True Selves: Understanding Transsexualism: For Families, Friends, Coworkers, and Helping Professionals" by Mildred Brown. Amazon has it, used, for under $10. It's so worth the investment!

  Coming out can be very liberating! I remember about a month of giddiness afterward...like a great weight had been lifted from my shoulders. I credit my successful, early transition to #1, having accurate information and resources available; #2, being patient and willing to help others understand and being open and honest; #3, Having a sense of humor about it.

  Good luck and be well!!!! You're going to be okay. :-)  <hugs>

I absolutely think something as big as this requires something a bit more direct. I personally felt like a letter was the best option because I know in the heat of the moment I get nervous and may not get to say everything I need to say. I left it on my mother's pillow and left the house because I was nervous. In some ways I also thought it may be like a "cooling off period" for her if she was to get angry.

The pamphlets seem so inpersonal. Think about it like this. If someone important in your life had some sort of bad, possibly incurable disease (I use this analogy only because it's something else that is a big deal), would you want them to tell you by leaving a pamphlet about the disease where you may see it?