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do you think it's harder to be male or female, why?

Started by xxUltraModLadyxx, February 27, 2011, 05:50:10 PM

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Izumi

Quote from: LordKAT on February 28, 2011, 12:36:21 AM
I think it is harder to be the gender you are not. The  people born into the right gender seem to have a lot less issues in general and actually like being that way.

Those of us  with bodies that just aren't right tend to think that the gender we are/were 'forced' to live as is the hardest.

I dont agree with this, sure its hard to transition, but once you their life was easier for me not harder, like someone pushed the easy mode button on my life.  As a guy it was stressful and screwed up a lot more.  I just couldnt get being a guy down no matter how hard i tried.  So, even though i was born in a male body, its easier for me to live as a female by magnitudes.

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Izumi

heh, i cant agree with what most people are saying.  Sure individual experiences vary but society falls into statistical norms mostly and statistics state very easily, women have it harder just about everywhere you go.

In some countries we are second class citizens, men are always first class only race sometimes effects it in certain places.

Glass Ceilings

Wages

Length of time for us to get ready to go to an event and men to get ready are typically longer because of hair, makeup, and complexity of dress.

We spend more money on luxury items in order to complete with other women in society:  For example cosmetics, haircare products, nail care, clothing, etc..   Men just buy a car, which they need anyway heh, with the spinny rims lol.

Also sometimes our opinions are disregarded

objectification of women by the media as sex objects

A lot more i care not to list....

Life for me as a woman is HARDER in the sense i have to do and pay for a lot more to do the same things i enjoyed living as a man.  However, living is easier since i no longer have an internal struggle to deal with on a day to day basis.  Life harder, living easy is what i have discovered.
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regan

To play devils advocate...

Men are expected to kill small things, ie bugs, and not be grossed out by it.
Men are expected to have a basic mechanical knowledge of all things, including being able to diagnose and repair them.
Men are expected to know how to operate all things mechanical especially cars and powertools.
Try asking for directions as a man.
Men can't express emotions, other then to hit something and "feel better about it"
In the male world there are clearly winners and losers, and you're either one or the other.
The "Alpha" isn't just for packs of dogs.
Boys are raised to believe that rubbing dirt on a wound heals all and what that doesn't fix can be cured by "walking it off"

The list goes on and on, but the point is its no better or worse, its just different.  The social expectactions don't bother the cisgendered population, for the rest of us it hard enough not being true to yourself - even harder when you're trying to hit all the stereotypes so, "no one figures it out"
Our biograhies are our own and we need to accept our own diversity without being ashamed that we're somehow not trans enough.
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xxUltraModLadyxx

Quote from: Izumi on March 03, 2011, 11:29:17 AM
I dont agree with this, sure its hard to transition, but once you their life was easier for me not harder, like someone pushed the easy mode button on my life.  As a guy it was stressful and screwed up a lot more.  I just couldnt get being a guy down no matter how hard i tried.  So, even though i was born in a male body, its easier for me to live as a female by magnitudes.

i think that's what he was trying to say. in being male, that was the gender you are not. or are you trying to say that it's easier to be female for you, but life overall is harder?
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LordKAT

Quote from: Izumi on March 03, 2011, 11:29:17 AM
I dont agree with this, sure its hard to transition, but once you their life was easier for me not harder, like someone pushed the easy mode button on my life.  As a guy it was stressful and screwed up a lot more.  I just couldnt get being a guy down no matter how hard i tried.  So, even though i was born in a male body, its easier for me to live as a female by magnitudes.

Your posting is actually agreeing with me, not disagreeing. My body is female but gender is male. Living as female is harder for me as it is the opposite gender. Transitioning made life much easier.

Your body is/was male buy your gender is female. Having female gender and having to live as male was harder for you as living as female was harder for me.
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pretty pauline

#25
Quote from: Izumi on March 03, 2011, 11:36:25 AM
heh, i cant agree with what most people are saying.  Sure individual experiences vary

Length of time for us to get ready to go to an event and men to get ready are typically longer because of hair, makeup, and complexity of dress.

We spend more money on luxury items in order to complete with other women in society:  For example cosmetics, haircare products, nail care, clothing, etc..   Men just buy a car, which they need anyway heh, with the spinny rims lol.

Also sometimes our opinions are disregarded

objectification of women by the media as sex objects

A lot more i care not to list....

Life for me as a woman is HARDER in the sense i have to do and pay for a lot more to do the same things i enjoyed living as a man.  However, living is easier since i no longer have an internal struggle to deal with on a day to day basis.  Life harder, living easy is what i have discovered.
I have to say I agree with you Izumi, its just things I notice and experience since I transition, my Husband I think only has 3pairs of shoes, gets a cheap haircut maybe every 2months, if we go to an event and he just throws on a pair of casual jeans maybe an old jacket he has worn hundreds of times nobody even notices or remarks, my maintenance routine now as a woman is completely different, more pressure and more expensive, no cheap haircut for me, my hair maintenance alone costs a small fortune with volumizing shampoo and conditioner, hair color, highlights, volume spray , setting spray and tints and then theres skin care, nails and makeup,then the big decision on my outfit, does this purse match my shoes and dress, it can be stressful on a woman, but worth the effort when we get it right, when the man in my life tells me I look pretty and gorgeous, but its hard work and effort, it takes Hubby about 10mins or less to get ready, takes me at least an hour, Iv never got ready in less than that. Then after all my efforts we where out last Saturday night when I torn a very expensive pair of luxury tights getting out of a cab, lucky it was just above my hemline but I was conscious of it the whole night, I know some here will say ''heck whats the big deal'' well it is a big deal for me, because Im a woman, in spite of all that Iv said, I still love living my life as a woman, but it is hard sometimes, my Husband is a great support and does take care of me.
Pauline
If your going thru hell, just keep going.
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Marvel

Ftm, so a bit biased already, tbh i see the female life as being the hardest, this is from my own experience, but when i look at some female friends i know their lives seem great. I guess its just hard live in the wrong body. I know a lot of women who have expressed frustration with the injustices and discrimination that they face everyday, but at least one thing i have seen is they are at peace with their lives.

I have heard lots of bio guys online and IRL admitting a guy's life is easy,  when asked what is the hardest thing about being a guy, some cant even come up with anything, others talk about something sexual. While on the other hand, with most females/girls its about biology, discrimination and life fustrations in general. That to me speaks volumes, but of course hardness/easiness  in general depends on a lot of factors eg social class, ethnicity, geography, etc, gender is just one part of the equation.
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Amazon D

Quote from: SpaceyGirl on February 27, 2011, 05:50:10 PM
changing ones sex gives me alot of time to think about these kinds of things. i used to think it was harder to be a male when i had to live as one, but i really only thought it was easier to live as female because i knew that's what i was. now that i'm living as female, i'm starting to see it's not that easy. i'm starting to think it might be just as hard as living as a male, if not harder.

For some of us, just living is hard, no matter what we live as.

For others they thrive not matter what they do.

What we need to do is measure ourself with ourself.

Did we find some productive benefits from transitioning!

For myself i got rid of that nasty testosterone that made my life hell so yes life is better for me compared to how i was before.
I'm an Amazon womyn + very butch + respecting MWMF since 1999 unless invited. + I AM A HIPPIE

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Izumi

Quote from: SpaceyGirl on March 03, 2011, 12:49:54 PM
i think that's what he was trying to say. in being male, that was the gender you are not. or are you trying to say that it's easier to be female for you, but life overall is harder?

I was saying that life as a female is harder, all the external pressures and societal pressures.  Never felt them as a guy. 

However, living as a female is easy because my brain is designed to compete with other females in society not males.  I also stopped fighting myself (my nature) making me more apt to deal with outside stresses.
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