Quote from: ajborelli on June 29, 2011, 12:03:41 PM
i agree, but my only problem with everything is personally i find penis to be gross.

Oh, that almost inspires me to talk about my own sort of complex history of attraction and aversion to different genitalia. haha.  But it's a long story and I dare not go into it now.

Quote from: Lee on June 29, 2011, 02:36:21 AM
No preference.  I love everyone 

Quote from: MasonM on June 29, 2011, 11:07:06 AM
I tend to refer to myself as 'Try-sexual: Because I'll try anybody once'.

These!     And that means you!   

I consider myself a lesbian, but I would probably be open to dating a trans man.  Straight cis men just disgust me for some reason.

Asexual. This seems to be somewhat rare among FTMs.

I consider myself to be bisexual. Personality and what the person is like is by far the most important thing to me, but physical attraction is necessary for me as well; sometimes physical attraction comes first, and it's either fueled (sometimes heavily, as is the case in one particular situation, haha) or fizzles when the personality is known, and sometimes personality comes first and is followed by physical attraction. But, if I don't find the personality attractive, then it doesn't matter.

So far this has largely worked out, to my knowledge at least, that I tend to be physically attracted to people who also have good personalities, but I'd imagine that's not always the case.

I can't say, however, that I'm pansexual. I have no experience to back that up (whereas I do with being bisexual) and, I have to confess, androgynes and genderqueers I don't really understand -- I understand who they are and how they identify and can identify that way, but I guess I don't understand how the relationship would work as a situation. Perhaps if I were educated on that, that could change, but for now...bisexual. FTMs I see as men (and I expect the same for myself: I am male, I don't identify as FTM even if that is what I technically am, and this has proven an issue in a relationship), MTFs I see as women, intersex I will see them however they identify. So...I don't necessarily see those as a basis for an argument of pansexuality.

All of that said...I also seem to have borderline commitment issues, so...haha. I came to that realization not too long ago. I understand that relationships are about compromises and sacrifices, but I'm looking to make as minimal compromises and sacrifices on what I want to do as possible. Selfish? Perhaps. But I'm also not a guy who feels he needs to be in a relationship, so...it works.

I identify as queer - though I date primarily women. I would definitely be open to dating another trans person (FTM/MTF/GQ/A/etc).

Bisexual, although not so much in practice anymore.  I'm pretty sure most people who know me now assume I only like the ladies.

Until I came out a couple of years ago, I was trying (and failing) to live as a heterosexual woman in a 6 year relationship with a hetero man.  I was mean to him, cold and indifferent at times, always aloof in public, and overly dominant in many areas of the relationship.  That was my own insecurities from being feminized, I resented the hell out of it even though I did it to myself. 

Since ending that relationship, I've only dated women.  I'm attracted to men (although I have much narrower 'type' criteria with men and more often am romantically attracted to them based on personality than physical attractiveness), but I have to wonder if I have too many issues to ever work out with one, especially sexually.  I think in the gay dating world, most of those who would even consider dating me would expect that my anatomy dictates that I be a total bottom, which I'm not.  Also, there's my non-sexual dominance issues, so something tells me I'd need time to adjust and be secure in my masculinity before trying to be with another man.  It's just as well though, the gay men here aren't even familiar with FTM's, the midwest sucks.

It's a shame though, because there were some real perks to having a male partner, those relationships tended to be lower maintenance and based on deep friendships and mutual interests.  So far that seems to be a tall order with the women I've met.  What can I say, I have more in common with other men.

Quote from: ajborelli on June 29, 2011, 12:03:41 PM
i agree, but my only problem with everything is personally i find penis to be gross.

i thought i found them gross too, until i got a boyfriend and found out a whole lot of things are possible if there's love (i was a girl at the time, or at least i thought so). now i like penis a lot, but i tend to be more interested in taking good care of the.. uhm, behind..

Quote from: dalebert on June 29, 2011, 12:07:11 PM
I'm jealous of pansexuals and bisexuals.  I would love to have such a broad dating pool!

the downside about being one (at least for me) is that it gives me twice the opportunity to get my heart broken. i've fallen for both straight and gay who were of the wrong gender to find me sexually attractive

Quote from: explorer on June 29, 2011, 04:16:24 PM
i thought i found them gross too, until i got a boyfriend and found out a whole lot of things are possible if there's love (i was a girl at the time, or at least i thought so). now i like penis a lot, but i tend to be more interested in taking good care of the.. uhm, behind..the downside about being one (at least for me) is that it gives me twice the opportunity to get my heart broken. i've fallen for both straight and gay who were of the wrong gender to find me sexually attractive

i really dislike cismales for the most part, i am not sure but none of them attract me at all, i am so into FtM and Cisfemales. idk maybe i am just weird

@ajborelli: weird? not at all. you're just you. i like cismales (as well as any other sex/gender variants), but i don't think i could have a relationship with someone who saw me as woman=bottom. i have tried once, but it didn't work. only much later did i realize the reason was that i'm not comfortable in a submissive position. as i am now i'd go for any relationship based on equality or me being more dominant. super masculine men aren't excluded from my interests, power bottoms can be really hot..

I'm one of those people that really thinks no one is 100% one way or the other - just about everyone is a little in-between when it comes to attraction.

I get attracted to personality first, then looks. Sometimes it's a guy sometimes it's a girl. I don't call myself "pansexual" or anything (I'm not even really sure what all these newer terms mean really!) There's only so far I would go with another guy though.

I am straight. Like women only.

I joke around and am up for a good time with anybody regardless of their gender/sex. I am sure an outsider who does not know me would think differently, but at the end of the night it's women only.  I just want to enjoy life and have fun while I still can!

I have had some purely sexual experience with some gay/bi men but have only dated women and usually choose women for romantic relationships/sexual encounters. I identify as queer. 

I call myself gay but I suppose I'm more homo-flexible.  My attractions to other genders fluctuates while my attraction to males stays constant.  (And yes, of course this includes trans males.)

Quotei like cismales (as well as any other sex/gender variants), but i don't think i could have a relationship with someone who saw me as woman=bottom. i have tried once, but it didn't work. only much later did i realize the reason was that i'm not comfortable in a submissive position. as i am now i'd go for any relationship based on equality or me being more dominant. super masculine men aren't excluded from my interests, power bottoms can be really hot..

Wow. This exactly.

My problem is that I like really masculine men, but because I'm short and am 'female' everyone automatically assumes I'm fine to be the sub. No way man, no freaking way. My ex held me down playfully once (I did this to him all the time) and I freaked out, started thrashing around and almost kicked him.

Sometimes I think I'd be fine having intimate relations with a woman, especially since a lot of the time I feel more comfortable with them, but I don't have any kind of wish for a relationship with one. I think when it comes to sex alone I'd be fine with pretty much anyone, so long as I got to play a more dominant role. But for relationships and attraction I'm men only.

well before I came out as being Transgendered I only liked women.  Now that I'm out as trans I seem to be more attracted/open to men.  I like to consider myself as queer.  I've never actually been with a man, but am open to the posibilities of being with one...

Had a male gay friend that was after my booty for years.
When I transitioned and he was the first and only person I could think of to speak too.
Let myself get into some intimacy which at that stage worked fine for him... hey, you will know with a guy, right?
But as he found out about my planning GRS and that was pretty much it for him. Now i'm a girl... and that's NOT what gay males want.
Cis-male-gay is attracted to cis-male straight or cis-male-gays as a rule, but do NOT like girl-bit and that includes breasts, even sub-A cups on a pre- or non-op, like self.
Apparently the same goes for gay cis-females. I understand that MtF are generally also not welcome play-mates as many/most have the same aversion for boy-bits, and even if those where just present way back in one's past. Of course narrower hips, less waist and broader shoulders may also play a roll.
Any of your own findings to confirm mine?
Self I'm bi with a "general" preference for cis-female, followed by MtF, cis-male with cis-gay-male a no-no due to past experience.
Also I consider my self definitely a "bottom" and two bottom don't seem to work that well in the sack either.
Axelle

I'm gay.  Pretty confusing since I knew I was gay before I knew I was trans, so the whole not being attracted sexually to women thing threw me for a loop and I thought I must be the only person alive that was shocked and confused finding they grew up *straight*!   I kept pinging everyone's gaydar anyways, they just thought I was a lesbian!

I wouldn't call the asexuality thing unusual, I still retreat to it as my safe little corner when everything else gets too overwhelming (the "finding an appropriate partner" and "dealing with this clusterf*** that is myself" sorts of things), even though I've discovered I'm not quite as asexual as I thought, when given the right situations.  Panromantic, I don't *mind* girls, I just don't like getting up close and personal with girly parts.  The ones I wish I didn't have, or anyone else's.

Quote from: Axelle on June 30, 2011, 09:51:56 AM
Any of your own findings to confirm mine?
Axelle

I guess I'll try to succinctly tell my genitals story... and will probably fail to be succinct.

So when I realized I was gay at 13 because I had a massive crush on another guy at school (that lasted all through H.S.) I was appalled at the idea.  Due to all the societal taboo around it ("->-bleeped-<-" was the worse thing you could call someone you didn't like) I told myself right then and there that I would never NEVER NEVER do anything gay with   another boy's genitals!  Ew! Yuck!  Gross!  That lasted maybe... a week or two before I started fantasizing about this specific boy and his genitals.  It was readily apparent to me that being gay was never about genitals.  I was crushing on a person and I simply realized that his genitals were a way to make him feel really good.  After that, I had plenty of fantasies about male genitals.

Some point since that time I developed quite an aversion to vaginas.  I'm appalled by how I acted one time when I was drunk and was actually coaxed into touching one and then ran around he apt holding my hand out in front of me like it was infected and screaming "I touched it!  I touched it!"  Horrible, but I was really drunk.

So anyway, I eventually started discovering FTMs that I was attracted to and went through the same process as when I first discovered I was gay.  I have a psychological block against dating women and the vagina reaction was just an extension of that block.  So in summary, my feedback would that the remaining girl bits are not a big deal to me when I am attracted to the person (due to overall maleness).  I've never been one to obsess over genitals beyond that they are a sexual part that's attached to the type of person I'm attracted to.  In fact, a big turn off for me is online profiles where some guy posts pics of his junk.  Just the idea that he seems obsessed with his own junk or thinks it some big selling point comes across as incredibly shallow and boring.

Breasts are a bigger deal though.  I would have a little more reservation about a pre-top-surgery FTM.  There's something more overtly female about them that seems to trigger my block.

Quote from: ajborelli on June 29, 2011, 04:44:22 PM
i really dislike cismales for the most part, i am not sure but none of them attract me at all, i am so into FtM and Cisfemales. idk maybe i am just weird

Hey, so I'm not trying to single you out particularly, but this comment basically embodies what I am trying to ask so I figure I'll start here.  And my question is: Could you explain this to me a bit more? (This question also goes out to anyone who feels similarly)

So, I'll start with the phrase "I am into cis females".  Now I can understand someone being put off by a penis, in that they would not want to have a sexual encounter with one present, but why does that mean you would specify cis females?  Because a lot of trans women don't have penises either and are basically indistinguishable from a cis person in every way. And also, say you meet a good looking girl and you are attracted to her, maybe you get lost in the moment and make out or something, but then you find out that she is trans and has her original equipment down there.  Now, obviously you don't have to have sex with her but could you say that you "weren't into her"?

And also, I'll put you in a similar situation with a guy.  Say you are approached by a guy and you say to him "Sorry, I'm not into cis guys" but then he says "Oh, but I'm trans!" Does this spark some sort of potential attraction that you couldn't have felt before?  Are you like, "Oh, maybe I'll reconsider then"?  Because I don't really understand how that could work.  Unless you are only attracted to trans guys who don't pass for cis?

I'm not trying to attack you, I do really want to understand these attractions you profess.  But I would be lying if I said I don't feel like your words are a little othering and transmisogynistic.

Thanks