so I decided it is time to tell someone in the workplace about me. One of the assistant managers has shown great support for the GLB community, and also support for gender expression, so I suspect it will not be a big deal. She knows I do nail polish, have done interesting hair things, and many other things, so it may not really surprise her. We're decent friends too, so I think that will help in it...but I will send an update either tonight or tomorrow night about it, just waiting on the time when I can actually tell her...lol.

Though it can be nerve racking, it sounds like they're sympathetic.  Good luck, and hopefully all goes well. 

If you have the management on-side the rest should fall into line fairly quickly.  Keeping my fingers crossed for you.

Karen.

It was exactly as I predicted, I talked to her just a little bit ago, and she is very supportive. She said even if no one else is, she will be on my side. She also told me that if the one guy that I am slightly scared about at work finds out, she will personally deal with him if he gives me a hard time.

And in other news, we're probably gonna go shopping soon.

Good for you, that's great news!

Randi

Enjoy that feeling of new found freedom!

I just came out to another assistant manager, and she was also cool with it, saying why wouldn't she be. She said to do what it is I need to do to be happy in life, so I got two people in my support at work now.

The following is a letter I sent everyone at the Lab from which I had retired the week before.  Anyone can feel free to use it as a starting point if they need to write one.

"Dear 
This may take a bit to follow, so sit back with a cuppa or a glass of something stronger, and we'll begin.                                            G****.

I have decided to write to those people I have worked with at Path for long enough  to  regard as a friend, rather than just a  work  acquaintance .  As I may not see some of you for a while I would rather not surprise you when we do eventually catch up.

I would like to stress that  leaving Pathology is not connected to this in any way. If the stresses of the Privatisation process, and the changes to the way Specimen Reception is now laid out had not arisen I would have preferred to remain, as I feel the changes  I will be making would have been easy to accomplish  here. 

You will no doubt have noticed significant changes in my appearance over the last year or so.   There is a good reason for this.  About two years ago I finally started to understand the cause of my  ongoing battle with severe Depression that started when I was about thirteen.  After a total emotional collapse I started to resolve many long standing issues, by discovering my true self, rather than the person I had been attempting to be for the last 40+ years.   For the first time since I was a teenager I can say that I am truly content, and actually like myself warts and all.  How others react to me now is for them to decide, however I hope you will wish to remain a friend into the future.

After   considerable   counselling  with a psychiatrist specializing in situations similar to mine I have been diagnosed with  a medical condition (not a Psych disorder) which is known as Gender  Identity Dysphoria.  That is, I have suffered from a profound difference between how I appear, and  what  my brain sees.  Although my outer presentation is male, my brain basically wired as female.  There is considerable evidence about this syndrome and I will be more than happy to share any reference material I have.

This is a completely separate issue to sexual orientation, although it is believed that a similar process is involved.

It is basically a foetal brain development variation which cannot be changed. The male foetus  reacts to hormones around 14 weeks gestation in an atypical way, with the body changing from the previous default female form, but the brain does not. (all foetus start looking female, males are a mutation!)

As you can imagine once puberty hit things were pretty horrible, as I kept getting  mixed  messages socially, and ended up spiralling into Depression. At the time I assumed everyone was going through the same thing, and as I didn't have any real way to express what I was feeling, let alone anyone to talk to about it, there didn't seem to be any way out.  I knew I wasn't gay for instance, but my feelings for the girls I was at school with didn't quite gel either.

Like many others who have suffered from GID I attempted to overcompensate by engaging in work and activities that stressed masculinity. Unfortunately this only reinforced the feeling that I would be caught out eventually, which was stressful in itself.  A vicious  circle was set up which just made things worse and  eventually I just accepted that I was going to suffer Depression more or less permanently.I had  resigned myself to living a life that was less than satisfying, and just going through the motions in the hope that something would eventually turn up but with little hope of success.

Over the last two years I have begun a long process of transition, involving considerable therapy to ensure I was doing the right thing, and hormone therapy to reconfigure my body to match my self image more closely.  I have now changed my name and am now officially known as Karen, and as of this week am now living totally as the woman I should always have been. 

As I said earlier, I am experiencing new feelings ,  happiness that I have rarely  experienced  other than when my children were born or at a few similar times. I hope you will be able to get your head around all this and accept me as Karen in the future, although I guess there is also the chance that some people will say, "wondered when you were going to say so!" 

If you would like to chat further at any time feel free.

Karen. "

i havent come out at work at all yet, but i have to a few of my friends. they're all very supportive of everything. i'm glad to have so much support from those that know about my transitioning. i just hope my family members take to it as easily. :/

My manager at work knows and also one gay male whom I am friendly with-he could tell as he personally knows someone else who is mtf. A girl who works in my department who is very friendly and nice to talk to has been asking questions when we are alone and offers a sympathetic shoulder if I ever need one-I have considered telling her too but as yet have not.

Very good news for you, just relax & do your job while being a beautiful woman. Have fun, be proud, be happy, smile, laugh & enjoy the life you deserve. During break do your nails nice, take a cosmo with you to read, wear nice perfume, etc... You can now enjoy yourself.

I'm glad for you girlfriend.

I am very happy for you.  I hope I get half the support you have at work when I make the move.  But, I am a bit pestimisic about the results as I don't have a good relationship with my co workers or boss.  I need more counseling.  May your next step be as fruitful.

congrats!!!!

What were the reactions like to your letter?

Quote from: justmeinoz on July 05, 2011, 04:16:50 AM
The following is a letter I sent everyone at the Lab from which I had retired the week before.  Anyone can feel free to use it as a starting point if they need to write one.

"Dear 
This may take a bit to follow, so sit back with a cuppa or a glass of something stronger, and we'll begin.                                            G****.

I have decided to write to those people I have worked with at Path for long enough  to  regard as a friend, rather than just a  work  acquaintance .  As I may not see some of you for a while I would rather not surprise you when we do eventually catch up.

I would like to stress that  leaving Pathology is not connected to this in any way. If the stresses of the Privatisation process, and the changes to the way Specimen Reception is now laid out had not arisen I would have preferred to remain, as I feel the changes  I will be making would have been easy to accomplish  here. 

You will no doubt have noticed significant changes in my appearance over the last year or so.   There is a good reason for this.  About two years ago I finally started to understand the cause of my  ongoing battle with severe Depression that started when I was about thirteen.  After a total emotional collapse I started to resolve many long standing issues, by discovering my true self, rather than the person I had been attempting to be for the last 40+ years.   For the first time since I was a teenager I can say that I am truly content, and actually like myself warts and all.  How others react to me now is for them to decide, however I hope you will wish to remain a friend into the future.

After   considerable   counselling  with a psychiatrist specializing in situations similar to mine I have been diagnosed with  a medical condition (not a Psych disorder) which is known as Gender  Identity Dysphoria.  That is, I have suffered from a profound difference between how I appear, and  what  my brain sees.  Although my outer presentation is male, my brain basically wired as female.  There is considerable evidence about this syndrome and I will be more than happy to share any reference material I have.

This is a completely separate issue to sexual orientation, although it is believed that a similar process is involved.

It is basically a foetal brain development variation which cannot be changed. The male foetus  reacts to hormones around 14 weeks gestation in an atypical way, with the body changing from the previous default female form, but the brain does not. (all foetus start looking female, males are a mutation!)

As you can imagine once puberty hit things were pretty horrible, as I kept getting  mixed  messages socially, and ended up spiralling into Depression. At the time I assumed everyone was going through the same thing, and as I didn't have any real way to express what I was feeling, let alone anyone to talk to about it, there didn't seem to be any way out.  I knew I wasn't gay for instance, but my feelings for the girls I was at school with didn't quite gel either.

Like many others who have suffered from GID I attempted to overcompensate by engaging in work and activities that stressed masculinity. Unfortunately this only reinforced the feeling that I would be caught out eventually, which was stressful in itself.  A vicious  circle was set up which just made things worse and  eventually I just accepted that I was going to suffer Depression more or less permanently.I had  resigned myself to living a life that was less than satisfying, and just going through the motions in the hope that something would eventually turn up but with little hope of success.

Over the last two years I have begun a long process of transition, involving considerable therapy to ensure I was doing the right thing, and hormone therapy to reconfigure my body to match my self image more closely.  I have now changed my name and am now officially known as Karen, and as of this week am now living totally as the woman I should always have been. 

As I said earlier, I am experiencing new feelings ,  happiness that I have rarely  experienced  other than when my children were born or at a few similar times. I hope you will be able to get your head around all this and accept me as Karen in the future, although I guess there is also the chance that some people will say, "wondered when you were going to say so!" 

If you would like to chat further at any time feel free.

Karen. "