Susan's Place Logo

News:

Based on internal web log processing I show 3,417,511 Users made 5,324,115 Visits Accounting for 199,729,420 pageviews and 8.954.49 TB of data transfer for 2017, all on a little over $2,000 per month.

Help support this website by Donating or Subscribing! (Updated)

Main Menu

Dating? Even my counselor wants me to..

Started by Korlee, July 17, 2011, 05:59:21 PM

Previous topic - Next topic

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Ann Onymous

Quote from: LilKittyCatZoey on July 19, 2011, 05:38:58 AM

Oh and not all boys want to get in your pants so if find a good one then no worries

remember also that not all of us have or ever had interest in dating guys (or even boys). 

But the concern that I have with the therapists recommendation is that while dating should certainly be a component to look at during RLT, the very fact that one is pre-op creates hurdles to the dating process.  And those obstacles can create even more problems for the pre-op than staying single creates...
  •  

LilKittyCatZoey

Quote from: Ann Onymous on July 21, 2011, 10:04:29 AM
remember also that not all of us have or ever had interest in dating guys (or even boys). 

But the concern that I have with the therapists recommendation is that while dating should certainly be a component to look at during RLT, the very fact that one is pre-op creates hurdles to the dating process.  And those obstacles can create even more problems for the pre-op than staying single creates...

Very true sorry see i was bisexual so i liked both :D :D But i am asexual joy :-\ :-\ :-\ :-\ but sorry i should of thought more about my answer :(
  •  

Korlee

Well scratch the whole thing as once again life has decided for me what is best.  I got hosed again with a job after rebuilding again.  Had to do it so many times I've lost count.  So ya, not wasting money or time on this bs as in fact I have decided to stop eating and I'm not partway through day two.  I just have no interest in rebuilding AGAIN or doing this after I am old like many of you.  So thus I am done.  Good luck to all of you.
  •  

A

I do not intend to date anyone, unless true love with full acceptance of my status, not a hint of sexual desire, flowers and fireworks appears right in front of me. It would feel wrong. I am not and will never be anyone's boyfriend, end of story. If a person wants me to be their girlfriend and I'm so head over heels in love that I'd forget dysphoria and be able to kiss them? Maybe. But one thing I'll never do is let myself lose my virginity before I have an acceptable body. It would feel like being raped.

Sorry for the rant. In any case, if you don't feel like dating, don't. You MAY want to try something if you're really unsure of your choice and are a person who really learns from experience, but if you're sure already, I don't see why you should hurt yourself. It would be like burning yourself on the stove just to make sure it really hurts.

Don't let anyone tell you "you don't know until you try". If you needed to try to know, you'd know that you'd need to try. (Awkward-sounding, but it's true.) I've been told to try guy talk, alcohol, driving, physical work, and even a short attempt to date... All it got me was uneasiness, pain, depression, despair, shame and my first kiss stolen.

Trust your instincts.
A's Transition Journal
Last update: June 11th, 2012
No more updates
  •  

LilKittyCatZoey

Quote from: A on July 25, 2011, 10:43:21 AM
I do not intend to date anyone, unless true love with full acceptance of my status, not a hint of sexual desire, flowers and fireworks appears right in front of me. It would feel wrong. I am not and will never be anyone's boyfriend, end of story. If a person wants me to be their girlfriend and I'm so head over heels in love that I'd forget dysphoria and be able to kiss them? Maybe. But one thing I'll never do is let myself lose my virginity before I have an acceptable body. It would feel like being raped.

Sorry for the rant. In any case, if you don't feel like dating, don't. You MAY want to try something if you're really unsure of your choice and are a person who really learns from experience, but if you're sure already, I don't see why you should hurt yourself. It would be like burning yourself on the stove just to make sure it really hurts.

Don't let anyone tell you "you don't know until you try". If you needed to try to know, you'd know that you'd need to try. (Awkward-sounding, but it's true.) I've been told to try guy talk, alcohol, driving, physical work, and even a short attempt to date... All it got me was uneasiness, pain, depression, despair, shame and my first kiss stolen.

Trust your instincts.

I was a boyfriend before and omg!!!!!!!! never ever ever ever again!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  •  

Korlee

Meh, no luck leaving numbers, poking, 'n' stuffs.  Maybe I should try online stuffs.  I've never made a profile to work with this though. xd
  •  

Korlee

What websites do you peeps use and what kinda profiles do you end up with? O.o
  •  

tekla

I don't know that what they want is dating as a romantic deal, but more as a normal social life.
FIGHT APATHY!, or don't...
  •  

Korlee

Quote from: tekla on July 28, 2011, 10:37:01 PM
I don't know that what they want is dating as a romantic deal, but more as a normal social life.

Well I have no interest in dating... cept to find the one or something serious.  I don't really have an interest in many social things either...
  •  

tekla

Right, and then what's the point.  You go from one form of social isolation to another.  And that's not what modern psychology is about.  A social life is considered normal.
FIGHT APATHY!, or don't...
  •  

Korlee

Quote from: tekla on July 28, 2011, 11:27:30 PM
Right, and then what's the point.  You go from one form of social isolation to another.  And that's not what modern psychology is about.  A social life is considered normal.

I dunno... I want to find the one some day... but I just dunno.  I like one on one stuff... and a few conventions.  However... I'm not much for clubs, parties, etc.
  •