Quote from: Kerberos on July 18, 2011, 02:08:57 PM
What's the best way to get into group gaming with other guys? I'm pretty sucky with video games, even though I enjoy them quite a bit. Just don't want to seem like a poser is all.

Does/has anyone gotten into live action role playing games with other guys successfully?

Solobear is correct!  I do live action role paying.  I'm really glad I started because I have made friends both male and female.  I'm beginning to see them outside of the game as well.  Which tells me they do like having me around. 

Not only that, it's great practice for gaining social skills and learning how to be a man in a man's world.  My character is a young naive vampire so it makes perfect sense that he isn't completely up to par with the rest of the undead. 

If you are interested I could try to get you in contact with the chapter of the Camarilla closest to you.  There are also werewolf games, magic games and fae games, if you've had enough of vampires.

I 've found that its easier for me to make female friends then it is to make male friends. That probably has something to do with growing up as a "girl". I don't know what it is but to me, girls seem more accepting. I could be wrong though. It has just always been easier to talk to girls. I wish I could have guy friends. I'm just worried about not being included as one of the guys.

How I've always made friends is just by letting it happen. In class, on a team, somewhere social, just start talking to the people around you. Shortly you will figure out who you mesh with, then just let the conversation flow.

Quote from: Kerberos on July 18, 2011, 02:08:57 PM
What's the best way to get into group gaming with other guys? I'm pretty sucky with video games, even though I enjoy them quite a bit. Just don't want to seem like a poser is all.

Does/has anyone gotten into live action role playing games with other guys successfully?

I don't do any sort of organized group gaming, but I will play video games with friends, CoD mostly. I'm younger and in college where pretty much everyone plays CoD so it's pretty common for a conversation around it to start then everyone will exchange Gamertags/PSN ID's. If yous guys decided to play at each others houses offer to bring the pizza or beer. I know it sounds cliche, but I don't think I ever gone over someones house to play video games and pizza and beer was absent since I was 12. There was Chinese food once, but passing around a controller sticky with General Tso sauce isn't the best. And you don't need a plate to eat pizza. If you want to get better play more and watch videos on YouTube.

Quote from: Squirrel698 on July 19, 2011, 01:49:12 PM
If you are interested I could try to get you in contact with the chapter of the Camarilla closest to you.  There are also werewolf games, magic games and fae games, if you've had enough of vampires.

I'm interested! 
Does it matter being someone who is new to this type of gaming and having no experience though? I like vampire rpgs.  If you're able and wanting, pm me and I'll get my info to you.

Quote from: Brent123 on July 19, 2011, 05:48:20 PM
I 've found that its easier for me to make female friends then it is to make male friends. That probably has something to do with growing up as a "girl". I don't know what it is but to me, girls seem more accepting. I could be wrong though. It has just always been easier to talk to girls. I wish I could have guy friends. I'm just worried about not being included as one of the guys.

not only because you were brought up as a 'girl but also because most girls are given the mommmy syndrome(no obviously some girls dont have it) this means being more accepting and nurturing is how they are, also girls are brought up to be 'nice,girlie,feminine,accepting' thats just how society works.

Now boys they are brought up to be 'rough, mean and told compassion and crying are crimes' so therefore they grow to be less accepting and more of a jerk than a girl.

Quote from: Squirrel698 on July 19, 2011, 01:49:12 PM
Solobear is correct!  I do live action role paying.  I'm really glad I started because I have made friends both male and female.  I'm beginning to see them outside of the game as well.  Which tells me they do like having me around. 

Not only that, it's great practice for gaining social skills and learning how to be a man in a man's world.  My character is a young naive vampire so it makes perfect sense that he isn't completely up to par with the rest of the undead. 

If you are interested I could try to get you in contact with the chapter of the Camarilla closest to you.  There are also werewolf games, magic games and fae games, if you've had enough of vampires.

i want to go back int LARPing haha. i did it once

Get into Warhammer, painting figures is a nice social activity. You'll get to trash-talk the other guys' armies, joke about the canon stuff, and generally have fun. Have a couple beers, talk, laugh, curse as you messed up the paint job a bit... A little like what I'd imagine being a sports fan is like, except without the sports themselves (raised by nerdy parents, so not a big fan of sports). I play as Dark Elves, I get a bit of flak for choosing the "gay army", but my army has nearly-naked chicks in it, and the guy who makes the "gay" jokes has no females at all in his army (he plays as High Elves). Mostly guys will be into Warhammer, I have never met a girl who liked it (all nerdy girls I know like Japanese RPGs, sigh...).

I never felt like getting a group of guys to do things that are often considered manly. I've been transitioning for maybe 7 years. I have a couple guy friends...a mix of cis and trans...some queer, some not.

Quote from: Wolfsnake on July 18, 2011, 01:52:51 AM
I grew up as a weird guylike anomaly, so I used to get along better with men than with women (we're talking hetero/cis folks here, which were the only kind I knew growing up in Conservative Land). When I moved out of state and everyone started treating me as female and expecting me to understand feminine interactions I got really confoozed.

The one big rule I can think of is this: don't go into a situation thinking "I want to be one of the guys, damn it." Go into it saying, "I'm one of the guys, damn it."

Minus the growing up in Conservative Land, I can totally relate to this. I always had more guy friends and the girl friends I had treated me distinctly different from their other girl friends. It was like even back then they knew I wasn't "one of them". Even today I still feel awkward around a group of females. I don't really get their whole elaborate "thing" (for lack of a better word) about interacting with one another that they do. I always feel like the odd man out, literally. I've tried to act the part on occasion and I think I have reached "secret circle of females" status on a couple occasions but it seriously does feel like I've sneaked into some secret society! lol

Most guys I've known do not play any kind of "head games" - they're pretty straight forward. They just really act like themselves most of the time. And that's a key thing - be yourself. If you try to force it and try to be more stereotypically "guy", then you'll come off weird.

Quote from: Squirrel698 on July 19, 2011, 01:49:12 PM
Solobear is correct!  I do live action role paying.  I'm really glad I started because I have made friends both male and female.  I'm beginning to see them outside of the game as well.  Which tells me they do like having me around. 

Not only that, it's great practice for gaining social skills and learning how to be a man in a man's world.  My character is a young naive vampire so it makes perfect sense that he isn't completely up to par with the rest of the undead. 

If you are interested I could try to get you in contact with the chapter of the Camarilla closest to you.  There are also werewolf games, magic games and fae games, if you've had enough of vampires.

Ha! Yeah LARPS are awesome!

Quote from: insideontheoutside on July 21, 2011, 07:22:47 PM
Most guys I've known do not play any kind of "head games" - they're pretty straight forward. They just really act like themselves most of the time. And that's a key thing - be yourself. If you try to force it and try to be more stereotypically "guy", then you'll come off weird.

this is probably what makes me come off as a guy online. i'm simply myself all the time. doesn't work the same way irl because i don't present as male, but i'm still usually never treated like a girl

Quote from: insideontheoutside on July 21, 2011, 07:22:47 PM
Minus the growing up in Conservative Land, I can totally relate to this. I always had more guy friends and the girl friends I had treated me distinctly different from their other girl friends. It was like even back then they knew I wasn't "one of them". Even today I still feel awkward around a group of females. I don't really get their whole elaborate "thing" (for lack of a better word) about interacting with one another that they do. I always feel like the odd man out, literally.

I can relate to all of this too (including the Conservative Land, unfortunately). At my last office job, there was one cisguy in my department, me, and about 5 women. The women related to the cisguy and me totally differently than they did to each other. One of the ladies even liked tormenting the two of us with disgusting stories about periods and pregnancy when we all went out to lunch. This stuff happened while I was presenting completely female and wearing blouses and women's pants to work every day, so it definitely has more to do with attitude and mannerisms than physical appearance.

QuoteMost guys I've known do not play any kind of "head games" - they're pretty straight forward. They just really act like themselves most of the time. And that's a key thing - be yourself. If you try to force it and try to be more stereotypically "guy", then you'll come off weird.

This is some awesome advice. Guys will call you out on it if you're trying too hard.

Quote from: insideontheoutside on July 21, 2011, 07:22:47 PM
. I've tried to act the part on occasion and I think I have reached "secret circle of females" status on a couple occasions but it seriously does feel like I've sneaked into some secret society! lol

Most guys I've known do not play any kind of "head games" - they're pretty straight forward. They just really act like themselves most of the time. And that's a key thing - be yourself. If you try to force it and try to be more stereotypically "guy", then you'll come off weird.

THIS. Ugh. I tried really hard to be a girl during college, and I ended up in girly groups doing girly things and feeling like "WTF I don't belong here!" all the time. Your second point is very true as well. I still have a lot of trouble interacting with women because there's always subtext. And I'm just that dumb guy who takes her at her word, yanno?

I am so glad I'm gay some days...

Anyhoo, before I sound like a mysogynist, I'd like to state for the record that my two best friends in the universe are female. They just don't pull girly bull->-bleeped-<-.

Quote from: Kerberos on July 18, 2011, 02:08:57 PM
What's the best way to get into group gaming with other guys? I'm pretty sucky with video games, even though I enjoy them quite a bit. Just don't want to seem like a poser is all.

Most guys don't care if you are not good at games just that you try. Also practice makes perfect.

At my school most the guys (and a rare few girls) Play magic and yugioh and there are people that loose almost every game but no one cares as long as they are not wining about it. When I play xbox with my guy friends they don;t get mad if I lose just as long as I try my best and don't act like a total idiot (running into crossfire, blocking a teammates feild of vision, accidentally shooting teammates) so if you wanna be a gamer go ahead.

Quote from: Natkat on July 18, 2011, 11:37:43 AM
I don't know other word for it in english?
it generally when you go home to someone to play videogames for the whole night,
you dont sleep just stay up the whole night, I dont know what it called?

i would call it pulling an "all nighter" playing video games.

Quote from: anibioman on July 23, 2011, 03:10:35 AM
i would call it pulling an "all nighter" playing video games.

That's what I'd call it as well, if anything. That or just hanging-out.

That's about the extent of my input (except to further agree with the fact that you don't need to be good at video games to be accepted in to play them, just don't take it too seriously and act like you're awesome because that'll backfire quick -- just have fun). I can't say too much that's helpful to the original topic because I guess I'm still figuring it out myself. I get along with other guys quite often better than I do the girls, or at least more easily and naturally, and am treated as one of the guys, but I can't say that I've made friends that I really hang out with...with either gender.

Curious to see if that will change as I transition, especially as I will be attending classes pretty soon as, well, myself to put it accurately.

Quote from: Kerberos on July 16, 2011, 02:16:17 AM
So something has been bugging me lately. I wish I had a group of guy friends to just hang with, play video games, watch baseball, workout at the gym, etc. Does anyone have the experience with this happening naturally after starting transitioning? It's been almost 3 years for me, and I wonder what I do wrong where I can't just be "one of the guys". maybe I need to learn some social skills but I'm also in my 30's, lol.

any advice or life experiences is much appreciated.

I'm pre-everything and this is happening to me. It started like the beginning of my last year in school (soph year, going into junior). Especially noticing all the Frats and stuff, it gets tough. I have only a few cis- guy friends that I've known since High School or recently became friends with, the rest are girls but I only probably hang out with the same 6 people consistently. I've been dying to make guy friends my age at school, but like I feel so awkward about not being accepted because they won't see me as a guy, I'm hoping transitioning will make this easier.
But I can totally relate- I've had a huge desire for a group of guys I can workout with, play some pick up games of football/basketball with. Totally relate.

All my guy friends are trans and live an hour away.  All my girl friends are cis and live here in town.  One I don't hang with much because her husband kinds creeps me out some and when I was still living as a female he accused us of screwing around.  Well he said stuff to her, not me but she told me about it and told him to not act like a dumbass.  Now I worry how he would react if I hung out with her a lot.