I got ready to go out last night. I put on my favorit blouse put on my makeup. I was beautiful and ready for the night. I walked into the living room my oldest daughter was sitting in there.it was the first time she has ever see me dressed up. She was shocked that I looked so much like a girl. I asked how I looked? She say if she did not know it was me she would have thought I was a woman.

Everything changes about me when I feel free. I forgot about being fisicly male. I went to the bar that I have been going to. There was a person there that knows by marty. It was great to see him but he kept calling he, him and so on. The icing on the came when some people came in that he knew. What hit me was they normaly don't go to a gay bar. They were there because it was one of their birthday.

He introdusted me as Marty. That is not the name I go by. That was okay but I could feel me being pushed back into my hiding place. I'm not a shy woman but I stayed a way from people as a guy. I he said to them He don't talk much. My mouth loched up. My heart started beating hard. Then he said, he is trying to become a woman. I felt like I had been slapped in the face. I wanted to cry so bad. I slowly picked up all my stuff off the bar and stepped down off the stool. They said where you going? I said, I'm going home. Why you just gothere he said. I did not say anything after that I had to get out of there.

I walked out into the parking lot and was going to just go home. I saw a rock beside an alley and sat down to cry. A black guy walked over to me and asked me if I had a fight with my boyfriend. I laught at him and told him I don't have a boyfriend. Then he said do you have sex with men. I looked up at him and said idid not come out here to talk I just want to be left alone. He said fine, I have to go anyway.

I didn't want go home so I sat there for about ten minutes and worked up the nerve to go back in. I was working on cheering up but it is hard to do when people keep reminding you of how you are down. I told him that next let me introduce myself. When you see me dressed like this she and her would be nice to hear. He knew all this before I have said it over and over again.

I was talked to by others at the bar told to not be ashamed of who I am. Cheer up, patted on my back.one thing about me is I am not ashamed of who am and I can't stand when people think they know what you are feeling and say a bunch of crap that has nothing to do with the real problem.

To finish the night of as I was walking out there were a table of black men sitting there and yeld out show us your #8ck. I looked at them and said I don't have one and walked off every unhappy.
The whole night sucked up untl I thought about what my daughter said to me before I left.

Bummer. I had a friend who REFUSED to stop calling me by my old name and going out of her way to introduce me as such, doing the "He" etc and I had been living full time for over a year. She seems to be a caring person but she is a rabid right wing conservative and IDK if it's just something she can't get past? I talked to her DOZENS of times about it. Even though we were good friends, I avoid having anything to do with her anymore. Life is too short to put up with people who hurt you and KNOW they are doing it. As far as your friend at the bar, IDK if he was drunk or just thinking it was cute or.... Like I said with my friend, I have no clue why she does this other than maybe she is pissed I look better than she does? lol My advice, ditch that friend and move on with your life if he can't stop hurting you. I guess one last talk to him might be worth doing?

+ 1

Done just that too.
Ditch those "friend", they not friends --- anything else but.

Axelle

I was strongly thinking about doing just that. I was not thinking about the needed to pass until this happened I don't even want people reconize me anymore to avoid crap like this.

Quote from: jainie marlena on September 04, 2011, 10:16:59 PM
Then he said, he is trying to become a woman. 1[...]

To finish the night of as I was walking out there were a table of black men sitting there and yeld out show us your #8ck. I looked at them and said I don't have one and walked off every unhappy. [2...]

The whole night sucked up untl I thought about what my daughter said to me before I left.[3...]

1. People genuinely do not understand, and they can't. We are not trying to become women, we are trying to get away from being perceived as men.

2. Harassment of this sort makes me bristle. I would say something very smart, but every situation like this is better if it just does not evolve.

3. daughters are beautiful, aren't they?

@ EmmaM
This was the first time this has happened to me like this.

Something else when I was reading your post I looked at your picture you are the spitting image of my sister. I am going to have to get a picture of her and show it to you.

Yes they are beautiful.

Quote from: jainie marlena on September 05, 2011, 03:36:48 AM
@ EmmaM
This was the first time this has happened to me like this.

Something else when I was reading your post I looked at your picture you are the spitting image of my sister. I am going to have to get a picture of her and show it to you.

Yes they are beautiful.

We are already women, that's what I mean to say It's better to have a (good, supportive) friend with you, being alone at bars is no bueno.

Cool! I'm starting to look like an everyday girl!

Babies are the greatest thing ever every 8 hours or so. You know, during the precious moments when they decide they don't want to drive you insane.

Quote from: EmmaM on September 05, 2011, 04:13:09 AM
It's better to have a (good, supportive) friend with you, being alone at bars is no bueno.

One thing I have found is having a girl friend to go out with (it doesn't have to be a TG one) makes things easier in social situations when starting off too. THEY are more sympathetic and people are less likely to pull crap like this and she can "call them out" without it getting macho fight mode about it. Doesn't mean all women are sympathetic (see my example) but many seem to have an easier time than guys do with it and something about a woman accepting you as -one of the girls- helps.

Stephe   

...and yeld out show us your #8ck...

If anyone ever pulled that on me, I think I'd look around puzzled for a moment, and then point to the smallest of them and say "Oh, there it is!" .

@ EmmaM
"We are already woman" I said to him, I'm not trying to become a woman. I am a woman.
@ Padma
That was funny. I might use that if there is a next time.
@Stephe
Believe me I am looking for some girls to hang out with. The ladie at the beauty shop is open to me and love talking to me. I was hope to strike up a friendship with her. Oh, get this my soon to be ex-wife sister has gottn closer to me since I told her about me. She was very open with me and said she would help me. A little strange though.

And quite frankly, I'd stay out of situations that would enable just that sort of BS.

There is a 6th sense I noticed that developed with me, avoiding situations I would not have bothered to be in when in boy-guise.

Once you transition --- babe, the jig is up, and you can very quickly become a 'free for all'.
So, --- listen to your newly developing girl instinct.

My 2 cents,
Axelle

Quote from: jainie marlena on September 04, 2011, 10:16:59 PM
To finish the night of as I was walking out there were a table of black men sitting there and yeld out show us your #8ck.

I would have said 8 INCHES out is now 8 INCHES IN  then smile as they gasp in sheer fright


Its not really good going to gay bars as a TS. They will always try to harrass us for their own enjoyment. They also do it because they can't have you sexually. I traveled the USA and saw how TS women were abused at gay bars doing shows and being laughed at by the gay men.. They use us for their entertainment. they do not support us. They just want to degrade us.. and make money off us.. the only ones they liked were the real drag queens they could see later off stage as men and be intimate with them..

Well there might be a very few who don't but you have to know they have fears of something ever happening to their lil pinky

Quote from: jainie marlena on September 05, 2011, 11:06:05 AM
Believe me I am looking for some girls to hang out with. The ladie at the beauty shop is open to me and love talking to me. I was hope to strike up a friendship with her. Oh, get this my soon to be ex-wife sister has gottn closer to me since I told her about me. She was very open with me and said she would help me. A little strange though.

Can't be any stranger than my ex from 20 years ago is now my best girl friend. We spent yesterday window shopping and getting our nails done.

@Axelle
My newly developing girl instints, have been saying there is far to much crap I have to shovel through to find what I am looking for.
@Amazon D
They know that I won't have sex with them because everyone that has come on to me. I look them in there eyes and say, your not going get anywhere with me so you need to move on.
@Stephe
It is strange that when you are doing your hair all the time and looking at other girl hair thinking how nice it looks on them and wondering how it would look on you. Changes how you think about a woman when she walks in the room. My ex wife sister came over to pick up her daughter that my daughter was baby sitting. When she walked in all those thoughts crossed my mind. My mouth opened and I told her how nice her hair looked. After that she started standing around me looking at me funny. My hair is very close to her length it would look nice on me. Lol.