Quote..and yes, Leigh had her views and I found this which coincides exactly with what I think:
Wow. I cannot believe you went there. I was assuming (hoping) this thread was dead, since everyone had the opportunity to spew out all their nasties.
First off. I knew Leigh Sparks better than anyone here. I was at times her closest friend, roommate, confidant, lover, and played devil's advocate for her on many occasions. Other than her leather dad, I was the first person she called when she was in a jam -- #2 on the speed dial.
Leigh was a slut. She would tell you so, to your face. She had friends in pretty much every community: lesbian, trans, gay, BI, kink, and on and on. Those who knew her loved her dearly. I think she slept with half of Portland. LOL!!!
She had a real thing about someone using the label woman, who had not lived as a woman. As you all know, her thing was being accepted by other woman (or ducks) as she liked to say. Leigh had friends who were she-male. How she viewed them, in the context of being accepted into the lesbo community, I am unsure. Her big thing was getting upset when someone, who knew of her background, would come sauntering up to her in public like they were her best friend. That bugged her bigtime. She hated that.
She would stand up for anyone's right to express themselves as they see fit, but she hated having her privacy invaded.
I often asked her why she stayed here year after year, after she finished her transition.
Her reply was always that she did it for the kids. She did it to help anyone struggling to find out where they belong. She sure struggled to find her place, whether anyone here knows it or not. It's also how she developed a tolerance for everyone struggling for acceptance and identity, and how I got dragged in here. You can thank our Miss Leigh (or curse her?) She felt that the people here needed a broader point of view, and I certainly have that, cause I am a big broad.
So, she was a dichotomy like everyone else. On the one hand, she'd fight for everyone's right to be themselves, but on the other hand, she resented when someone she did not necessarily like invaded her space. And like a lot of women that transition, she sometimes felt the need to keep a distance or space between herself, and other women who transitioned. So, there was this tug of war thing that went on in her head.
But, let me say, uncategorically, that she hated -- H-A-T-E-D, all of the sniping that went on the GLBT community. It upset her, that people in this community, who are the current red-headed step child (as she liked to say) for abuse, would then turn around and heap abuse on other people. That is one thing we did agree on.
So yeah, I did hear her espouse the view that you dug up from her, because it is relating to definitions used by the HBSOC. But....I also heard her at various times express the view that she wished there was no HBSOC, and that she wished at other times that they were tougher in their stance.
It was like this: She really had no problem with anyone identifying as they wish, presenting as they wish, and hanging out with who they wish......as long as it was not in HER particular group. THAT is the truth. She didn't want anyone to embarrass HER.
But that became less of an issue over the time that I knew her.
I would advise that we all follow her example. If she didn't like someone, or how they presented around her, or how they identified, she wouldn't necessarily post it out there for all to see -- to create a controversy. She'd do what all women do -- call her friend over to her side, and vent, rather than making a big stink.
If you don't like she-males, or non-ops, or post-ops, or whatever, that is your business. But what is to be gained by coming here and throwing down a gauntlet? To draw a line between yourself and someone else, so that you can feel better about yourself. There are LOTS of things I do not like about the people in this community, and views that can be incendiary to say the least. But what would I gain by expressing them here and making someone feel two feet tall?
I don't get it? There are plenty of people out there in the real world more than happy to label you out of existence. According to them, you are all nuts.
Sometimes the finger-pointing that goes on in this community reminds me of people from the religious community. I once asked a strict Baptist associate of mine why it was so darned important to point out how flawed everyone else is, and why they would go to hell for what they do. I asked her, wouldn't it be great if everyone was forgiven, and went to heaven? She was appalled! Her reply? What good is living a pious life and suffering if everyone gets to be saved? And therein is the rub! It is the exclusivity that makes it VALUABLE.
If everyone that self-identified as a woman, or female, or whatever was accepted as such, would transitioning and whatnot be as important? Is that why it is necessary to label ourselves apart from other people, or to be exclusionary in doing so?
You know my opinion. I could care less. I hate everyone equally.
