Been a while since I posted here, a lot has happened (backstory in previous post)

So I came out to my SO two weeks ago tomorrow. She was definitely confused, but took it pretty well at first (even gave me a makeover ) but was really depressed for the next few days and, I found out later, didn't eat for 4 days after I told her. A lot of it was her thinking it was somehow her fault, despite me assuring her it wasn't, and part of it was her thinking she was going to lose me (I of course told her she wouldn't). One thing that really helped was the SO faqs, they answered a lot of the questions she had and were a huge help. She's been very supportive since, lets me dress up and wear eyeliner (I only do it around her and certain others though), but has made it kinda clear that she doesn't want me to change, and thinks I'm sexy and perfect just the way I am (the opposite of how I feel ). She never said she'd leave me for it, but she clearly doesn't want it, which is tough considering how much I want it

When we went birthday shopping yesterday, the first store we went to was Sears, and we went through the entire girls' section before arriving at the guys' (looking for guys' skinny jeans), and I was pretty bummed for most of the day after. I wanted more than anything to try on nearly everything I saw walking through the girl's section, but due to my shyness and our company it wouldn't have happened anyway. She asked while we were walking through there if there was anything in particular I wanted to look at, but I just told her no so she wouldn't be upset about something she couldn't change

So my 19th birthday was yesterday, and she bought me, along with some other things, an eyeliner pencil, an eyeliner/eyeshadow double-sided pencil with sharpener, and 2 pairs of girls' skinny jeans

Which brings me to another problem, I'm very skinny and got one of those jeans in Size 0, and she is very self-conscious about her weight, despite how many compliments she gets on her looks on a daily basis. She's made comments a couple times like "You look better in my clothes than I do," "I'll never be able to fit into cute jeans like you." As I love her very much, I hate seeing her upset, especially when it's because of me. Ironic, I'm jealous of her gender, and she's jealous of my size :\

I could really use some advice, as I'm not really sure where to go from here. Despite everything going way better than I expected, I kinda feel like I'm in an impossible situation

Well Happy Birthday Kirst! ^^
Your girlfriend seems very emotional type (I may be wrong) but I'm sure if you try and take it slow step by step with her she'll respond better, but try to remember your happiness is important too! Try to show her you are still you even though your correcting your gender and try to tell her that. I think she is afraid that you won't be the same person.

as for impossible situation~ "My dear friend there is always a way out!":doctor who

As for the confidence issue she seems to have compliment her on her things ^^ every girl loves a good compliment
But on a happier note did you have any cake ?

I've done all the usual things (read a lot of FAQs n stuff regarding this), told her I'm the same person I always was, I still love her and everything about her more than anything, I just want to be able to be the person I feel I am and be able express myself the way I want to be expressed. And the compliments never stop for her, she is gorgeous and I'm always reminding her of it, but she doesn't feel the same way :\

I know how she feels, because no matter how many times she calls me handsome and sexy, doesn't make me hate my appearance any less :\

Happy Birthday!

The best thing you can do is keep checking on her to see how she feels(in general). These things are tough I'm still struggling myself but we can't forget about how the people around us feel too. Showing concern for her feelings while being aware of your own will take you both very far. Communication is key!

It seems to me that her own self esteem/image issues came to a boil seeing you in girl mode. Look at it from her side. "There is my b/f looking fabulous and here am I a real woman and can't look half as good in the same outfit".  I sure can get depressed over that and had many times when the shoe is on the other foot!

She may also have issues with her own sexual identity. For my former fiancee of many years I am sure a lesbian experience at boarding school had a lot to do with her suddenly calling things off with no warning signs at all.

She was just hit with a lot to take in. Think how long it took you to deal with it! Just giver her some time to take it all in and hold on tight for the emotional roller coaster ride she is on and dragging you along on now. Be especially free with compliments and all the little things that lets a woman know she is wanted, actually desired. Try not to move too fast thinking that if she said she is accepting and supports you, that emotionally on the inside she isn't in turmoil. We are all great at lying, especially to ourselves.

It is hard to come to terms with a spouse transitioniong.

Everything will change for her. Granted more will change for you but she will have to transition in a way also.
You have had 19 years to come to terms with having this vicous birth defect. She has only had a very short amount of time to come to terms.
There will be arguments, tears and hurt feelings on both sides. This is pretty much unavoidable. When I transitioned it was a strain on my spouse. When my spouse started transition...it was almost too much for our relationship. It was touch and go for a few months. Keep in mind we are in a relationship with both partners having GID. If it was hard for us...how much harder is it for a spouse who does not understand GID?

Just be aware that there is a very big chance that your relationship will not survive your transition. I am not trying to crap on your day. I am just trying to be brutally honest.

From where I am sitting (which is on both sides of this equation...) it is much harder to be the spouse than the transitioner.
Give her time to adjust and to vent. Do not get defensive but do not back down from your need to transition.

hugz