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Scared to wear t-shirts at school stealth

Started by Dylan Michael, September 09, 2011, 11:13:57 PM

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Dylan Michael

Hey guys I started high school this week and i know I pass and everything but
I'm too paranoid to wear just a binder and t-shirt to school. I just got a new binder today but I'm still scared of someone like touching me or idk but it's hot out still and I bike to school so how should i convince myself that I look fine? Idk if this is just me but it sucks wearing a sweat shirt or button down every day. Thanks.

Sharky

Maybe you could wear an open button up or jacket over a t shirt. You can always take it off if you're feeling confident.
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dmx

If you wear a tank-top type thing under the shirt it makes it a little better.

Also wear dark colored shirts made of thick/heavy material with a graphic on the front.

Inconvenient, I know. But that's what works best.
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Vincent E.S.

Thicker cotten shirts are the way to go. They'll keep you from getting quite as hot and they won't show stuff as easily. Definitely make sure there's a design on the front, the busier the better. Maybe starting off, you could wear t-shirts one size too big. That way, you won't be drowning in your clothes, but it'll be loose enough to hide any remaining lumps.
You could also wear a zip-up hoodie so long as it's not too hot. My zip-up hoodie is even better than my binder when it comes to passing. I've passed when wearing a regular bra and a tight shirt before, simply because the folds of the hoodie hide anything that's there.
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zombiesarepeaceful

I know how you feel. I work in 2 factories and it gets hot, and people always ask me why I have so many layers on. I refuse to wear just a tshirt in public. Too paranoid about my chest, or someone asking about the binder if they touch me or see it. (it has happened to me before)
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emil

if you're scared of people seeing or feeling the binder, you could always explain it's a back brace.

as was mentioned, you could try out heavy cotton t-shirts since they are more rigid. if you're on the skinny side, fitted t-shirts may work better than oversized ones because it looks more in proportion than a wide shirt that doesn't show any contours except in the chest area.

i always brought a zipper hoodie i could put on if i started feeling uncomfortable.

striped t-shirts are a good idea - distract the eye and make your upper body seem bulkier
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Dylan Michael

Thanks for replying guys. I'll probably try wearing a little bit less every day lol. I have tons of button downs and zipper hoodies so that's good. I think I'll wear a polo shirt then a t shirt the next day. Im more confident when I wear tighter t shirts for some reason but I'm pretty skinny so it looks a lot better than huge baggy shirts. Also I know I'm not gonna be hugging people but can people tell you have a chest if you hug them?

Vincent E.S.

I think it depends on how you hug them and how large your chest is. I usually do the side arm hug thing so that my torso doesn't touch whoever is insisting I hug them. If I have to do a full frontal hug, then I slump my shoulders forward even more than usual, so that if he/she touches a part of my torso, it'd be a part above my chest.
I've hugged one of my close friends while binding and she said it felt weird because she couldn't  feel my chest.

I went to Tokyo in Tulsa presenting as male and feeling very confident at the time, so I spent the day trapping random people with leashes and asking them for hugs. I passed the whole time. :)
If I hadn't been binding, it may have been different.
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Hayzer12

My binders make my ->-bleeped-<- feel like pecs, so idk.. I went to a bar and a dude felt on  my chest  while he was drunk tellin me to go ahead before him in the bathroom since I had waited longer than him and he patted my chest to edge me along. He didn't notice a thing. Alot of my friends touch my chest - and it feels like pecs to them as well.. so I don't think a hug will be that big of a deal if you have a good double front compression binder.
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anibioman

girls always hug me and they think im completely flat and there are multiple girls that touch my chest just for fun and they dont notice anything. people wont notice unless you give them reasons to question your gender. so just be confident and no one will think any different.

Hayzer12

Quote from: anibioman on September 11, 2011, 11:07:36 AM
girls always hug me and they think im completely flat and there are multiple girls that touch my chest just for fun and they dont notice anything. people wont notice unless you give them reasons to question your gender. so just be confident and no one will think any different.

This is correct. If you go into the dudes bathroom(or even if you dont), speak with a deeper voice(or not talk at all), dress and act with onfidence that you are a MALE then no one questions. I've never seen anyone that I've come into contact with say "wait, aren't you a chick?". For one, I'm pre-T and already pass 100 percent of the time now with my binder on, but I think a lot of it has to do with the way that I present myself. I go into the bathroom like I should be there, because I should. If I walked into the female bathroom they'd freak out and be like WTF IS A BOY DOING IN HERE. In fact, at a bar before I had used a male bathroom, I walked into the female bathroom and girls were like - oh god, he's drunk. LOL I was like OH ->-bleeped-<-, this isn't the men's bathroom! And they laughed.

Just present yourself as male, and people will perceive you as such. Not many people have heightened radar that is on the look out for transgender folk lol. The only way people ever know that I'm FTM is because of certain people from my past calling me by my birth name, and because of class rosters in University. The professors look at me weird as hell when I raise my hand to the last name, and then they quietly whisper to me '(insert birth name here)' and when I nod, they drop it. Now most professors just call me by my last name lol.... and as I said I'm pre-T as well and I have a baby face, so just have confidence. You will be fine.
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lexical

Quote from: stiltsk on September 11, 2011, 02:28:19 PM
This is correct. If you go into the dudes bathroom(or even if you dont), speak with a deeper voice(or not talk at all), dress and act with onfidence that you are a MALE then no one questions. I've never seen anyone that I've come into contact with say "wait, aren't you a chick?". For one, I'm pre-T and already pass 100 percent of the time now with my binder on, but I think a lot of it has to do with the way that I present myself. I go into the bathroom like I should be there, because I should. If I walked into the female bathroom they'd freak out and be like WTF IS A BOY DOING IN HERE. In fact, at a bar before I had used a male bathroom, I walked into the female bathroom and girls were like - oh god, he's drunk. LOL I was like OH ->-bleeped-<-, this isn't the men's bathroom! And they laughed.

haha, that's a great story.

I feel nervous too wearing a binder and tshirt over it so I'm not sure what to tell ya. Layering is good, plaid button downs unbuttoned are good as they tend to hide what's beneath them. I layer as much as possible which is rough in the summer but fall is coming so it'll get better.
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