Quote from: FullMoon19 on October 11, 2011, 01:34:17 AM
it's just 2:32 A.M, and i'm doing my usual obsessive leaving no stone unturned thing through the internet. i often stay on longer than i need to.

*i think i just posted in the wrong section. i feel like i'm getting dumber.

xD It's all good

I'm sick today! I felt like crap yesterday, I slept a lot, and now I'm sick. Small wonder. I probably have to work, too. But I have sooo much laundry. I should just call in sick.

well, I am doing great. I am moving out of my parents to go live with my boyfriend, and I am really excited, because we have been long distance for so long.

I am also going to buy a motorcycle, its a 2001 Honda rebel, black.  Its used but in great shape, I got to see it on thursday and it is only 1400, I am gonna try to get it for 1300 though.  its really sexy and has great power.  Once I move I will have to take motorcycle lessons because I have never ridden one.  I will be sure to take a picture of me sitting on it and add it to the bad-ass thread.  its gonna be great to have a source of transportation because I have never had a car.  Its a "small" bike, which is good for my size, its about 300 pounds.  I dont need a huge bike anyway, i would look silly on it.

I also was able to get a transfer at my job, so i have a guaranteed job as well, which is great.  And once I move I am gonna look into internships at funeral homes because I want to be an undertaker (dream job)

I am gonna miss my current co workers and bosses though, but I may be able to work in a different area at my new job, here I work in shoes, which I am good at but dont like too much.

I am also really excited to have Christmas with my boyfriend and his family, but I will miss Christmas with my mom, it will be my first Christmas away from home.

ever since getting back with my boyfriend my emotions seem to be coming back a little bit.  I had a few months there where i didnt feel anything.  I think it could be a personality disorder, lack of empathy, guilt, emotions.  but its getting better.  i think it could be a complex, I need to learn that it is OK to be  open to my emotions and soft sometimes and it doesn't make me weaker or less of a man.

Also, rent with my boyfriend wont be much, so I can work my ass off and save save save for surgery.  I am used to working long shifts, hell I did a whole 12 hours once when my boss was desperate, i was a bit loopy but I managed.

I'm glad to hear these great news from you, Elijah!
As for me, life is pretty alright. Appointment with the gender therapist on Tuesday. Medication. Sitting here, sipping tea, listening to Joy Division.
Wanting to dye my hair many colours but knowing it will mess my passing up totally. Wanting T and top surgery so I can wear a pretty dress and look gorgeous in it (that dress would look awesome on a bloke but pretty bad on a girl). Sadly, the clothing company's website is stupid so I can't link you to it (but it looks great), it is black with a pattern of safety pins, would look badass with big stompy boots and multicoloured hair.
I'm also really looking forward to the day when I move out from this apartment and won't have to share a room with my sister, won't have to hear the wrong pronouns and name all the time, etc.

Joy Division - Autosuggestion
This song is so good...

Joy Division is pretty awesome. No one else I know likes them. o.o

I love Joy Division.

Quote from: Elijah on October 14, 2011, 01:12:43 PM
I am also going to buy a motorcycle, its a 2001 Honda rebel, black.  Its used but in great shape, I got to see it on thursday and it is only 1400, I am gonna try to get it for 1300 though.  its really sexy and has great power.  Once I move I will have to take motorcycle lessons because I have never ridden one.  I will be sure to take a picture of me sitting on it and add it to the bad-ass thread.  its gonna be great to have a source of transportation because I have never had a car.  Its a "small" bike, which is good for my size, its about 300 pounds.  I dont need a huge bike anyway, i would look silly on it.

I've been a rider my entire life, it's in my blood.

Might I recommend an older Honda or Yamaha?  A 250cc or smaller.  When I was a kid, the rule was "if you can't pick up the bike when it's down on its side, you have no business owning it."  I'd hate for you to be stuck somewhere because your bike got knocked over and you were unable to lift it back up.  (This happened once to me, my bike was knocked over with its saddlebags on and I couldn't get it back up without risking knocking someone else's bike over.  Thankfully the fire department happened to be in the same parking lot and picked my bike back up.  I live firefighters, who doesn't?)  The mid 70's to mid 80's for Honda and Yamaha are good years, the bikes maintain their value and literally are workhorses; they just won't break!  Even a 175cc would be fine on the highway.

But if you want to go with the Rebel, offer the guy  $1150 cash and let him haggle you up to somewhere around $1250-$1300.  Cash talks, bull->-bleeped-<- walks.

Just ordered a bunch of stuff of Amazon.

A new xbox...you can message me for my gamer tag
MW3 hardened edition
Dexter kill shirt
Dexter ID badge and holder
Fake needle
Fake knife
A CD for my little sister

I bought some stuff after work today (Value Village).

Awesome black baggy pants hooked up with about a metre and a half of chains (originally from a store I used to love that closed down, otherwise I never would have bothered with them) I don't really dress like a punk anymore but I figured I may as well humour the teen in me, since they only cost me 10 bucks.
I also have to wear a cowboy costume at work tomorrow. So I bought ->-bleeped-<-ty faded jeans, a black plaid shirt, a cowboy hat and a toy gun. I'm got a neat Union Jack buckle too, even though cowboys are an American image. It's the only belt buckle I have and if you're dressing up as a cowboy, ya need a good buckle.

That was my lame day.

Quote from: Epi on October 14, 2011, 06:41:34 PM
I've been a rider my entire life, it's in my blood.

Might I recommend an older Honda or Yamaha?  A 250cc or smaller.  When I was a kid, the rule was "if you can't pick up the bike when it's down on its side, you have no business owning it."  I'd hate for you to be stuck somewhere because your bike got knocked over and you were unable to lift it back up.  (This happened once to me, my bike was knocked over with its saddlebags on and I couldn't get it back up without risking knocking someone else's bike over.  Thankfully the fire department happened to be in the same parking lot and picked my bike back up.  I live firefighters, who doesn't?)  The mid 70's to mid 80's for Honda and Yamaha are good years, the bikes maintain their value and literally are workhorses; they just won't break!  Even a 175cc would be fine on the highway.

But if you want to go with the Rebel, offer the guy  $1150 cash and let him haggle you up to somewhere around $1250-$1300.  Cash talks, bull->-bleeped-<- walks.

hey, thanks for that advice, i hadn't thought about lifting it if it had fallen.  I think I should be able to handle it, its about 300 pounds and pulling 300 pounds is different then lifting it up in the air.  And you think I should start haggling that low? I was gonna go in with all the money in hand but ask if he wanted 1300, but I guess there is no harm starting lower, if he takes it, then cheers for me lol.

I am currently rocking Muse on the headphones and am locked into working (well, not working right this minute obviously).

I've also been having insomnia again lately. Can't quite place why but just have a heck of a time trying to sleep. And lack of sleep is not a good thing!

My house is currently overrun with spiders and it's freaking me out but the bug man is supposed to show up tomorrow morning

My cat is sitting on the chair next to mine, snoring.

I think that's enough excitement for one post.

Today was a pretty good day. I got off school early which was a really pleasant surprise. :-) I'm very excited for Halloween to come because it's my birthday. I don't really plan on doing anything because everyone's always busy but I still love Halloween. (I'm getting a zombie costume together...because I've never dressed as a zombie for Halloween before and I found that just a little bit disturbing. <XD To the GoodWill!)

I'm having a very masculine evening of watching ballroom dance competitions, knitting, and snuggling with my cat.  Life's good.

I've had a really good past week.  working on coming out to my whole family one by one.
Still trying to decide where to go to college at in relation to my family.

My mood is strange. I feel sad and angry right now, and I have no idea why. Like I'm waiting for something to happen, waiting for the tears to break through or for my hands to ball into fists and punch something or someone. A strange feeling, and I can't say I enjoy it. I feel lonely yet I am surrounded by people. There's people to chat with online and people to talk with in the real world. I'm not sure why I feel so strange, I wish I knew.

Quote from: Elijah on October 15, 2011, 12:16:34 AM
hey, thanks for that advice, i hadn't thought about lifting it if it had fallen.  I think I should be able to handle it, its about 300 pounds and pulling 300 pounds is different then lifting it up in the air.

here's a video about picking up your bike....much easier to do facing away from the bike that pulling up towards you. not that I hope it happens, just best to always be prepared when it comes to riding!

How to pick up your motorcycle

Quote from: Logan1986 on October 15, 2011, 01:19:04 PM
here's a video about picking up your bike....much easier to do facing away from the bike that pulling up towards you. not that I hope it happens, just best to always be prepared when it comes to riding!

How to pick up your motorcycle

That's how you pick up large motorcycles, not smaller ones.  Also, under most parking conditions it's not possible to pick up your motorcycle like that unless you have your own large car parking spot.  If you parked in motorcycle parking, you have to lock the handlebars and face the bike while using the bars to lift it back up.  Either way, a beginning rider has no business on a large motorcycle.

Depending on the size of the person, a smaller bike can still be large enough. My roommate is barely five foot and incredibly skinny. He's had problems with this in the past.  Always good to know another way to pick it up whether you end up needing it or not.

I had an epic mirror pep talk a few minutes ago that I think did me a lot of good. Now I'm just screwing around on youtube. A little bummed, because I was supposed to be getting some money today. I was gonna spend it on a webcam, basketball shorts, thermals, a small sports bra, a haircut, and some hair products. But eh, whatever, I'll probably have it by the end of the week.

Quote from: Logan1986 on October 15, 2011, 01:19:04 PM
here's a video about picking up your bike....much easier to do facing away from the bike that pulling up towards you. not that I hope it happens, just best to always be prepared when it comes to riding!

How to pick up your motorcycle

I would have never thought of that. thanks! btw, i got my bike, I put up a pic in the badass thread if anyone want to see.

Cheers lads, I've been to the second visit with the gender psychologist guy, and he seemed like a really nice man in a very Stephen Fry way. It seemed like he understood me, what I was about and such, and that felt good. My mother also talked to me about surgery and stuff, and she seemed totally cool with me being trans and all that. Earlier yesterday, I was worried about her since she was crying, but it turns out she was crying about the loss of her "little girl", and she's okay now.

However, I'm unsure about how my father deals with all of this. He's ceased making jokes about how I should drink the girls' energy drink, and instead makes jokes about a children's film in which the main character shares my name. I suppose that's progress, in his somewhat unusual way of dealing with these things.

This is that very pink girly energy drink, it's even called Femme. I didn't know soft drinks were gender coded...

I also might get my name change forms filled in today, life really moves forwards for me.