Maybe they were amazed that someone they thought was male could look so good.

Quote from: Tammy Hope on October 20, 2011, 02:29:34 AM

the younger ones tend not to be. I've actually had pictures taken of me in a public place like a store. I keep wondering if I'm going to turn up on People of Wal Mart

My walmart is Indians and Filipinos. The other one is in a Mexican neighborhood. so not worried... Most of them have their own lives.

As for the OP, I would have known you were trans right away. Would i have pointed it out to my friends and been catty? Likely not. Maybe pointed it out to my b/f....I point out every trans person I see to him. But they were rude and cruel which was uncalled for.

Quote from: Mahsa the disco shark on October 20, 2011, 01:10:14 PMAs for the OP, I would have known you were trans right away...................Maybe pointed it out to my b/f....I point out every trans person I see to him.

I don't think what you said will make the OP feel any better...Just sayin'. Btw, why do you point out all transpeople to your bf? Does it give you some sort of satisfactory feeling? Or is point out the ->-bleeped-<- just a game you like to play?

Quote from: JenJen2011 on October 20, 2011, 01:28:02 PM
I don't think what you said will make the OP feel any better...Just sayin'. Btw, why do you point out all transpeople to your bf? Does it give you some sort of satisfactory feeling? Or is point out the ->-bleeped-<- just a game you like to play?

I think she's pretty though.

I point out everything to him. "That girl has blonde hair"... "look a blue car".... It doesn't give me any satisfactory feelings. He seems not to analyze everyone/thing he sees.

Quote from: Mahsa the disco shark on October 20, 2011, 01:31:57 PMHe seems not to analyze everyone/thing he sees.

That's probably a good thing.

Quote from: Elsa.G on October 18, 2011, 08:52:24 PM
hey everyone thanks for the support, ive had a couple of hours to get all the steam out. I was mostly angry today when that happened just because it was totally uncalled for. I mean what business is it of their's? Im there to shop just like everyone else and mind my own business, i just hate how people have to stick their nose into things that they know nothing about and people who they dont know.

Yeah. Venting is fine, especially when we've been mistreated by others just because they can.  I'm glad you're choosing to look at it like this, it really is their issue and not yours in terms of who is behaving badly.

The bottom line to me is, "Am I gonna live how I want to live and feel I need to live to be happy, or am I going to let people like that derail my plans to be happy as myself?" I refuse to give them the pleasure of ruining my life, I'm going to do my thing! I'm glad you are empowering yourself.

QuoteAnyway as i was thinking today, ive decided that i want to opt for facial feminization. It's a bit drastic but i feel like that will help me pass way more. At this point in time i feel its more important than srs, even though the bits down there distress the hell out of me i think FF will help boost my confidence, especially socially.

I remember coming to similar conclusions early in my transition, although my results were better than I expected and so I changed my plan. It's important to maximize the impact of your available resources on your happiness, and frankly people see the face and interact with the face daily, whereas only you and a select few only ever get to see under your clothes. With all the changes nowadays where surgery is no longer being required for legal document changes, I think we have the option of focusing on things like face. If it empowers you and helps you to feel more comfortable as you, then go for it.

I don't think ffs is the option. But then again, I've only seen limited pics of you. I remember when I first started...I'd hear nasty things every once in awhile. I don't want to sound rude and tactless, but its part of being trans. It's still misunderstood by many people of both genders.

Being a gay man before, I knew if I dressed up too ->-bleeped-<-gy...I'd be insulted and people would laugh. I am not justifying the actions of the girls, that was totally inappropriote. But I remember complaining to my Aunt once about something and she said, "It's gonna happen, not everyone is going to understand what you're going through"

I just recommend going in there like you own the place. You could easily improve your makeup and you wouldn't need ffs though... Hormones would eventually kick in and do their thing.

Quote from: Joandelynn on October 20, 2011, 02:14:21 AM
Wow, "a gaggle of boppi bimbos", "airheads"? If you think like this about a bunch of young girls then you also shouldn't be complaining if they say something nasty about you.

Because they clocked someone and told her? I know it sucks, but this sounds like a total overreaction to me. Just shrug it off and try to improve your presentation if something like this happens to you, see it as a learning moment.

Quote from: Joandelynn on October 20, 2011, 02:14:21 AM
Wow, "a gaggle of boppi bimbos", "airheads"? If you think like this about a bunch of young girls then you also shouldn't be complaining if they say something nasty about you.

Because they clocked someone and told her? I know it sucks, but this sounds like a total overreaction to me. Just shrug it off and try to improve your presentation if something like this happens to you, see it as a learning moment. 

Actually, i think its fair the opinion i have of them since they after all were the ones who were being rude and catty with me. Lastly If it happened to you i highly doubt you would find it easy to just shrug it off and go on with your day without feeling any effects. Maybe it should happen to you and see what you think about it. 

It happens Elsa but stick to your guns we I go out sans makeup often now and still get called maam!

Quote from: Marie Simone on October 20, 2011, 10:36:03 PM
It happens Elsa but stick to your guns we I go out sans makeup often now and still get called maam!

Way to make the OP feel better.

But seriously Elsa, just be you.

that was catty of them but keep your chin up. Just snap back... I'll tell people that i'm a transitioning transgender women. If they want to know more and i'm not in a position to pass on the knowledge I tell them to look it up on friggin google and that i'm in a hurry. if someone's goal is to make fun of me for being trans, i tend to not waste my time further and distance myself as much as possible. Don't take it hard : ) be proud.

Elsa I can say it would be noticeable from seeing your face in a couple photos. Our opinions on how others would view you isn't going to be accurate though. The vast majority of people glancing by you in a store don't see numerous gender nonconformists and before-after photos on a daily basis, if ever. You also aren't so noticeable that these women could tell 100% that you weren't really a female, you are presentable and don't look like a drag-queen. If the only people commenting about you are immature teenagers, you certainly aren't alone, they likely proceeded to scoff at dozens of people that day due to weight, dress, age, or color.

So many people preach hairstyle and I agree that it's important. I have nothing bad to say about your hair on its own, it looks very stylish and healthy. I do however think it leaves your face exposed to cruel lighting conditions and forces you to rely on make-up to cover any perceived flaws. I'm not even stating it in a manner of passing, as your style could look much worse on GG's, and no amount of surgery would fix them. Maybe covering your face so that no one can see your eye color is excessive, but I as much as I hate bangs, hair in the face makes a big difference.

Quote from: Morrigan on October 20, 2011, 11:09:33 PM
You also aren't so noticeable that these women could tell 100% that you weren't really a female, you are presentable and don't look like a drag-queen.

Morrigan, people are observant and notice stuff. We're discussing that on the passing thread. I think there was something which set these young women off and they reacted to it. I don't think there are enough objective, honest critique on this board as well... I understand support, but I think we're all gonna work harder and project more confidence when criticized. If people want to grade me down on that comment.. fine, at least I am not creating false confidence.

On a side note:
What is wrong with looking like a drag queen? Most drag queens are more gorgeous than tgirls and gg alike IMHO. One of my coworkers told my Mom that I should be on drag race, because I look as good as Shangela and Carmen. No girl compares to Carmen Carrera...She's like Kim Kardashian + Eva Longoria x10. She isn't even real...and she is beyond beautiful.

Memphis has some of the best drag queens as well..

Oh don't tell me that, I'll have to go to Memphis, I'm so close right now! I feel these forums are part informational and part support group. Sometimes people don't want to be critiqued and it's hard to tell if not stated, so I try to balance between the two as best I can.

I don't have anything against drag queens, but there is a tendency to be very flashy and noticeable, even flaunting. That may not always be the case, but there is a markable difference in confidence and desire to fit in, comparing drag-queens to transgendered women. Trying to fit in as a woman in a women's store is more stressful and does not warrant a reaction like a drag queen boldly shopping in the same store does. Certainly the last thing she wants is a group of children giggling and making jokes, can the drag-queen say the same? I don't really know, when I equated my lifestyle to that of a drag-queen's, I didn't know transitioning was even a reality, and I certainly refused to ever leave the house.

Quote from: Morrigan on October 20, 2011, 11:50:46 PM
Oh don't tell me that, I'll have to go to Memphis, I'm so close right now! I feel these forums are part informational and part support group. Sometimes people don't want to be critiqued and it's hard to tell if not stated, so I try to balance between the two as best I can.

I don't have anything against drag queens, but there is a tendency to be very flashy and noticeable, even flaunting. That may not always be the case, but there is a markable difference in confidence and desire to fit in, comparing drag-queens to transgendered women. Trying to fit in as a woman in a women's store is more stressful and does not warrant a reaction like a drag queen boldly shopping in the same store does. Certainly the last thing she wants is a group of children giggling and making jokes, can the drag-queen say the same? I don't really know, when I equated my lifestyle to that of a drag-queen's, I didn't know transitioning was even a reality, and I certainly refused to ever leave the house.

Don't want to be critiqued? Cool. Then don't post in the "do I pass/will i pass/fabulous section"

But there has to be truth in balancing support. I don't believe in lying to people at all. Which is why I never reply on posts and critiques that are beyond help.

As for drag queens? GG's love drag queens. I think because they can see it for when it is, entertainment or the fact that most of those men make better women. At least a drag queen would have people telling her she's fabulous as opposed to a lot of the anti-makeup/anti style I see on this board.

Listen, maybe I am superficial... But oh well.. I am not gonna lie to these girls on the board. Makeup and style can be adjusted to fit any lifestyle.

Quote from: Mahsa the disco shark on October 21, 2011, 12:02:35 AM
Don't want to be critiqued? Cool. Then don't post in the "do I pass/will i pass/fabulous section"

But there has to be truth in balancing support. I don't believe in lying to people at all. Which is why I never reply on posts and critiques that are beyond help.

As for drag queens? GG's love drag queens. I think because they can see it for when it is, entertainment or the fact that most of those men make better women. At least a drag queen would have people telling her she's fabulous as opposed to a lot of the anti-makeup/anti style I see on this board.

Listen, maybe I am superficial... But oh well.. I am not gonna lie to these girls on the board. Makeup and style can be adjusted to fit any lifestyle.

You are a bit Catty well .... More like mountain lion catty! 
But that's beside the point, I go out in public with out makeup now and am call ma'am. (Meaning things do get better) 
It will happen, you will get clocked from time to time. But life goes on so keep pushing for what you want. 

As for you Mahsa, no is beyond help and maybe if you write a few kind words. you might inspire someone.  Over all
what I see from you is a lot of self ego stroking and a  alot of blowing your own horn!

So for all of us hopless cases!

Neener neener neener!

I would have hoped I was quick enough on the uptake to hit them with something like, "actually I'm a dyke and I think you're cute, you interested?"

Worked for me with a drunk woman in a pub!

Karen.

Quote from: Marie Simone on October 21, 2011, 07:30:34 AM
As for you Mahsa, no is beyond help and maybe if you write a few kind words. you might inspire someone.  Over all
what I see from you is a lot of self ego stroking and a  alot of blowing your own horn!

So for all of us hopless cases!

Neener neener neener!

How am I catty? Hardly. If I were catty, you'd know... Just blunt honest and don't associate who I am with self ego stroking. I've told plenty of the girls here I thought they were beautiful.

But it's cool...I can deal with being superficial in your eyes.

Quote from: Mahsa the disco shark on October 21, 2011, 11:59:54 AM
How am I catty? Hardly. If I were catty, you'd know... Just blunt honest and don't associate who I am with self ego stroking. I've told plenty of the girls here I thought they were beautiful.

But it's cool...I can deal with being superficial in your eyes.

I don't see you as superficial. I see a few of your comments as superficial. 
Frankly I am not so shallow a person to simply judge based on my first impression.  Truly I hope you are a wonderfull person and that we end up being fast friends on Susan's place.

In point of Fact I should be the first to apologise as what I said was probably aggressive.
So "I'm sorry Mahsa" 

Marie.

Quote from: Marie Simone on October 21, 2011, 04:00:41 PM
I don't see you as superficial. I see a few of your comments as superficial. 
Frankly I am not so shallow a person to simply judge based on my first impression.  Truly I hope you are a wonderfull person and that we end up being fast friends on Susan's place.

In point of Fact I should be the first to apologise as what I said was probably aggressive.
So "I'm sorry Mahsa" 

Marie.

I know I am superficial

Actually you said what was on your mind and I disagreed. But thanks for the apology...