So at my university, the degree I am getting requires a class in which we do community service. I don't have an issue with that. We also have to be in groups...I HATE group work. Horrible experiences with it but again, I'm OKAY with working on a team.
So far, one of the people that are in the group, has missed 2 out of the 4 classes we have had so far. Another one, I can tell just isn't interested in working at all.
The guy that has missed a bunch of times told me we would go to the place to volunteer today. I thought he had things all scheduled and what not since he had been the one to decide we would volunteer there. I get there and encounter a very pissed off woman who got angry at me for not scheduling a time and saying that she can't help me. I need this for my grade. It's due wednesday. Long story short, the guy in my group went there, (I could tell that even though he said we would be working there today he had no intentions of going. He even brought along his girlfriend. As if it is all some joke) The other owner of the place ended up arriving and he kinda helped me out. But basically these are a bunch of rednecks and I am pretty sure I got some dirty looks. The guy really wouldn't look me in the eye and there was another guy who I smiled at and just looked away. I don't feel safe working there.

What's worse is that the guys I am in a group with, I can tell don't want to work. The guy from today was like "Oh so I can help you with the paper". I know he is just going to bail out on me like he has for everything else. I don't trust the crappy work I know he will spew out. Because he asked about a presentation that we have to do and he is like "we will wing it".

I missed last class because of my depression. I just wasn't feeling well and I ended up not going. But tomorrow I have my first official appointment with the therapist at school who has dealt with transgendered students and what not. So apart from talking to her about those issues, I am going to tell her about this. And I have to meet up with my prof tomorrow anyway, to talk about the presentation since the other two guys skipped class. So I'm gonna tell her what's going on and see what she can do to help me.

Do you guys think I am being stupid? I REALLY did not feel comfortable at this place. I rather work at a legit humane society for my project. Somewhere I know will be safe. I plan on starting my transition. Binding, packing and what not. And I don't feel safe at that place where I look like a butch lesbian and they looked at me like I was some disease.

How long do you have to work there?  If it's due Wednesday, does that mean this group work/community service ends on Wednesday? 

I've had to make this distinction myself recently.  Just because something feels uncomfortable doesn't mean it's unsafe.  If you only have two more days of this, then it might be best to tough it out and make sure you don't get stuck in a similar situation next time. 

No. That's just it. I haven't done my community service at this place yet. We would have to do 10 hours of work at this place. And I'd have to work with these two idiots for another project in class.
Trust me, it's not a good place. My mom mentioned this place to her friend just now and she said it's a bad place to be.

If you don't feel safe, talk to your professor. While there are times when fear is irrational, it can be a warning based on something you've noticed at a conscious or subconscious level. Fear and discomfort are our bodies natural warning signs that something is wrong. If you're interested in the mechanics of it, look for a book called "The Gift of Fear" by Gavin DeBecker.

On to your situation in specific. Professors are aware that people in groups can be idiots. Some will offer solutions, others won't. Bringing it to their attention is the only way the problem can be addressed, especially if your "partners" don't want to work and/or are putting you in situations that are dangerous to your health. Remember, your safety is paramount, if you feel its a bad place, trust your gut. Coursework & grades can be worked on later.

Is there another place you can think of to volunteer on your own? An animal shelter, food pantry or social service organization? Showing you're interested in working might help you gain extra time/win the professor over.

Hi Nick,

I hope you mind a female joining in. I am a Uni Prof, among other things, but not in the USA.  I would encourage you to meet up with your Prof ASAP and explain in a none emotional way what has been going on. If you can have dates and times with the names that would be great. Monitoring students in these sort of placements is basically trying to teach respect and team work. If they do not understand the meaning of those concepts then they should be 'counselled' .

Please bring your problems to your Prof. If he/she ignores it I'd get out of that school!

Cindy

Quote from: Cindy James on February 07, 2012, 01:53:59 AM
I hope you mind a female joining in.

...grammar police thinks you meant something different. haha sorry the douche-bag in me couldn't stop myself.

Woops

Can still be taken both ways though