Does anyone else want to be male, but still dress typically female sometimes and look androgynous? Or is that just me.
Btw, I am physically female and, yes, I know it makes no sense.

Doesn't matter what you want to be or how you look or what you are lumbered with.

Cut through the rubbish and get to the core, who are you when the lights go off? Who are you inside?

Then try and introduce that person to more people, let um get out more. If it really is you then it will get easy and people will like you more for it.

Then, and only then, look back and see what gender etc etc it is, and what it looks like and all that other periphery.

You totally missed my point and I feel insulted by that response.
You are calling part of who I am rubbish. I know you don't mean it because you don't know any better, but please refrain from doing that in the future ok? You may see parts of people in compartments like that, but I don't. Also, you don't know who I am. You have no reason to assume anything. Next time, please ask or at least get to know me first instead of telling me I am doing something I am not or should do something I am already doing.
If you were asking who I am at my core because you want to know, I will gladly tell you. However it will be essay length and I need to go right now, so it will have to wait.

What was the point then? Cos I missed it.


I  don't see people in compartments. Indeed I see them as an organic whole, rather like trees, lots of branches coming off one solid stem, that is flexible enough to go with the wind but strong enough to hold the whole together. My intention in my reply was to encourage you to seek that stem, as it seems the carcrash of genders you propose doesn't seem to be a coherent whole but a loose and unstable mishmash... I thought I was being helpful and honest.

Finally, you are on the androgyne forum, the forum for those who feel they are not exclusively male nor female - and you were writing about wanting to be male. Now, seeing as you are on this forum, I assume you meant you would like to be male but know at your core you are andro - so I was saying not to worry about what you want to be, but what you are.

You're right I did accidentally put this on the wrong forum. I meant to put it on the transgender forum and only realized my mistake after I posted it. Sorry, but I do not know how to fix that. I'm androgynous some of the time, male some of the time, female some of the time, both male and female some of the time, and neither some of the time. In other words, I don't really fit on any board specifically, so I have to make do.
Oh! I see where the problem is! I forget how difficult it is for others to understand. Sorry. Who I am is a "loose and unstable" mishmash although I prefer to call it being a variable, fluid mix of many many parts. I do not have a solid stem and branches. What I have instead is the "outer personality" which is whatever aspect is strongest at the moment and the "base personality" which is all my aspects including the current outer one. It's all one, intricate unit. I like it that way. Well, mostly. There are times when it's difficult, but I still wouldn't want to be any other way.
The point was to ask if anyone else sometimes felt like one gender (opposite their sex at birth) and wanted to crossdress as the other gender (same as their sex at birth). It will help me figure out some things.

It's a wiggly world eh?

Cat fight!

 Yes, it's quite chaotic. I like it that way though, all in all.
I like cats.

 

Short answer: yes.

I'm female-assigned, and I think the closest words to describe my gender are agender and neutrois. I feel like neither male nor female, rather than both, and I tend to experience it as a lack of gender altogether, rather than a third gender.

There are times when I want to be pretty and wear dresses and makeup. However, I don't feel like a woman when I do it. I feel, if anything, like a boy in a dress. Likewise, there are times when I want to wear baggy men's jeans and button-down shirts, and if I had to assign a gender to those times I would probably describe it as a butch or androgynous girl.

So when I'm having femme, pretty days I tend to feel more like a boy, and when I'm having more butch days I tend to feel more like a girl. It seems I gender my outfits and presentation opposite to the rest of the world.

Yet, underneath it all, I don't feel like I have a gender. This is just as close as I can describe it in gendered terms. Clear as mud?

Yay I'm not alone! Thanks.

On a different topic you were looking for labels if your gender is constantly changing then you may be genderfluid

I'm a guy with a female body
I identity as a guy   - and i love dresses!

After all, it's just clothing. It doesn't change your gender :|

Quote from: Kyyn on April 08, 2012, 10:10:25 PM
I'm a guy with a female body
I identity as a guy   - and i love dresses!

After all, it's just clothing. It doesn't change your gender :|

I'm a bit like this.  However, I usually identify as a very feminine male or a very masculine female because that's what I feel.  I love dresses immensely, assuming I'm feeling more male.  I also love feminine clothes because masculine clothes are just too...baggy and not form fitting.  And they don't come with the ruffles I like so I'm more likely to wear female clothes that are ruffly when I'm feeling male.  When I'm feeling female, I generally dress in something more plain.

I can't really figure out to explain it because it sounds kooky to me.

Quote from: Edge on April 08, 2012, 07:23:05 PM
The point was to ask if anyone else sometimes felt like one gender (opposite their sex at birth) and wanted to crossdress as the other gender (same as their sex at birth). It will help me figure out some things.

Um... kinda?

I don't really think in terms of gender 'cause I'm unclear on what that word actually means. In any case, I don't seem to feel whatever other people do, or at least not in the same way. I suppose I could technically be described as agender, but I don't really bother my head about it.

I was assigned male at birth. This was wrong, I am female (sex) and have altered parts of my body to make myself more comfortable. I regularly wear a mix of boy's and girl's clothing, 'cause I like to, I find the arbitrary division silly, and I feel weird, like I'm pretending to be something I'm not, if I slide too far masculine or feminine. I'm not sure that's what you mean by crossdressing exactly though; even when in boy clothes I look like an androgynous female - I don't/can't pass as male, nor do I particularly want to.

Quote from: Pica Pica on April 08, 2012, 04:44:05 PM
Doesn't matter what you want to be or how you look or what you are lumbered with.

Cut through the rubbish and get to the core, who are you when the lights go off? Who are you inside?

Odd... I tend to think the opposite. What I want to look like, what I want to be, how I feel about my body... that matters. Those are things I can do something about. Who I am inside? No idea. Maybe I'll figure that out by the time I'm dead. Not that I really care much one way or the other. I can't do anything about it, so why fuss? I am as I am. It's all good.

But the outside would then be artifice without the connection to the inside. You can't do much about the inside, but for the outside stuff to have any authenticity or integrity, for who you wish to be to have any connection or relevance to who who are, then an understanding of that core is essential.

Like Plato said, 'The unexamined life is not worth living', or the Delphic Oracle, 'Know Thyself'. Any possible happiness or contentment with any stability or foundation, not just wafting about happy and unhappy as circumstances dictate, surely must rely on this sort of internal knowledge.

I think that what one wants to present outside is automatically connected to the inside. At least, that's how it is for me.
As I understand it, boys get beat up for wearing certain cloths because they're "girly." Well, actually the real reason is because the attackers are weak idiots, but that's the excuse they use. Those are the clothes I am referring to when I refer to crossdressing.

Quote from: Pica Pica on April 09, 2012, 05:02:09 AM
But the outside would then be artifice without the connection to the inside. You can't do much about the inside, but for the outside stuff to have any authenticity or integrity, for who you wish to be to have any connection or relevance to who who are, then an understanding of that core is essential.

Like Plato said, 'The unexamined life is not worth living', or the Delphic Oracle, 'Know Thyself'. Any possible happiness or contentment with any stability or foundation, not just wafting about happy and unhappy as circumstances dictate, surely must rely on this sort of internal knowledge.

<-- See the tags? I love my artificiality.

There is only the one of me. Anything I do is a function of who I am. And "knowing" myself is not necessary for me to express myself. In fact, I'd be more likely to say that expressing myself is necessary for knowing myself.

And people aren't static. We evolve and change and shift and rewire throughout our lives. Which is why I said I might know who I am when I'm dead. Till then it is a work in progress.

Quote from: Edge on April 09, 2012, 06:16:11 AM
As I understand it, boys get beat up for wearing certain cloths because they're "girly." Well, actually the real reason is because the attackers are weak idiots, but that's the excuse they use. Those are the clothes I am referring to when I refer to crossdressing.

'Kay, so I'm crossdressing by that definition. Just going in a different direction, since I'm AMAB and female and wearing boy clothes.

Where and when I grew up, girls were sneered at for wearing "girly" clothes.
Tomboys and current fashion are different than being male in a female body.

I think I am similar. I am a woman. I am not meant to be a woman and I have known this for a very long time. I have a fair share of dysphoria. So basically, I know I am meant to have a male body. But even with a male body, my 'inner self' (soul, whatever you want to call it, the thing that is me inside) would be third gender or at least androgyne. I would probably dress androgynously though, not go as far as to cross-dress- unless it was for something like cosplay.