Im afraid my boyfriend and I won't last long.
We are high school sweet hearts and he's going to college this year while I'm in my junior (11th year) of high school and I came out to him recently.
He said he is 100% completely straight but he won't judge me and he still loves me but I don't get it. I love him so much and he's the #2 person I can just talk to and let myself go and just be normal with (even while wearing girl clothes) and he isn't put off by me wearing men's shirts and very baggy women's pants (my dad won't let me go anywhere near the men's section, I steal shirts from my sister's fiancé). But anyway, i feel like my boyfriend and I won't last like I thought we would before I told him. We still hold hands and kiss etc like always but he seems off. Any advice, please? I just need to rant.

Quote from: jasper3 on June 19, 2012, 08:20:37 AM
Any advice, please?

Oh, Jasper, high school love is so difficult. Your feelings for your BF are just as strong as anybody's but as a teen you have fewer resources to stay as close as you want.

And keeping a high school romance when one person goes off to college is really, really hard, which sucks because it hurts so much when there is distance between you.

Two possibilities. Either you stay together or you don't. If you do, it will be because you're well matched and he is right with all pieces of you, including your gender identity and because you both make a super effort to keep the romance going.

Either way, my advice is to keep the other parts of your life going as strongly as you can. Surround yourself with friends who understand you, both your gender identity and all the other wonderful parts. Get involved in things that are fun, either at your school, or whatever else there is. Find things that you like doing. Books? Movies? Computer games? Sports? Crafts? Outdoor stuff? Whatever makes you happy, make sure you do a lot of it. And to whatever extent you can, gently educate your parents about what it means to be transgender and why allowing yourself to express your true gender is so important.

If you stay together, all this will improve the way you relate with your boyfriend. There'll be a lot of pieces of you to love, with your gender identity only one facet. If you can't stay together, having the rest of your life be as rich as possible may lessen the sting and make it easier to move on.

*HUGS* and good luck.

I think he can support it kinda easier because I'm effeminate. Im not girly but I'm definitely not macho. Honestly, if I had a gay boyfriend I'd rather be a bottom. Lol.
Also, we are very good for each other even though his family hates me and my family isn't excited about us being 4 years apart in age. We love all the same things mostly. And we get along great.
And he is very nice and sympathetic and light hearted but he makes sure I realise that he isn't gay.

He might just seem a little off because there is probably a lot on his mind what with starting college and all that.
He doesn't need to be gay. This is just my opinion: sexuality labels don't cover enough. He could be straight and still be attracted to you because... well, you're you. Obviously, he likes you.
He sounds really supportive. That's great!

Really?
I mean I know he's supportive I just have doubts for when I get enough money for a binder etc
I love him and I know he loves me but I thought his sexuality really could hinder the relationship when I came out to him

If he truly is "nothing but straight" as he says, then likeliness is you will begin to have a lot more troubles and will have a hard time staying together at that point. It is possible the only reason you two are still together now is because he is still able to view you as female and that puts him in enough of a comfort zone for him to stick around. This may not be the case, but given how you already noticed things changing, I just figured I'd say.

Quote from: JasonRX on June 19, 2012, 12:12:45 PM
If he truly is "nothing but straight" as he says, then likeliness is you will begin to have a lot more troubles and will have a hard time staying together at that point. It is possible the only reason you two are still together now is because he is still able to view you as female and that puts him in enough of a comfort zone for him to stick around. This may not be the case, but given how you already noticed things changing, I just figured I'd say.

Mh well maybe but until he says he wants to leave I may just want to set myself up for hurt and keep on going with him. If he can't deal with it when I go further into transition then I hope he and I can still be friends. I do love him

in my world he would need to at least be bisexual to be with you.
its not because I mind labels that much But I just feel it somehow disrespectull to say "fine your a guy, I love you but I only love girls?"
it dosent fit for me in my world.
--
anyway, My bf in first school said he was 100% straight but to be honest I doubt he was,
after being with me for a while he started to admit to some people he might be a little bicurious. and to be honest I feel he manly wanted to be straight because it was a taboo not to be.
I had other guys who started saying they where straight but after a while claimed to be more and more bisexual.
attraction is attraction anyway.
--

My sister calls him "->-bleeped-<-gy" (no offence to anyone, I'm merely quoting). And I think he isn't 100%, but maybe at most 99% lol. He has admitted to using "those toys" but I know that does not define sexual orientation.

So did my ex and he had a tendency to kiss guys (he claimed it was "pretending"). I asked him if he was bi and he insisted he was straight. So yeah... make of that what you will. I have had a friend of mine point out that he (claims to be straight) and his friend (also claims to be straight) seemed really gay with each other (at a time when they weren't pretending) and I'm inclined to agree.
Make of that what you will.

I've never seen him act gay, the gayest I've seen him act is him and me talking about Stewie from Family Guy. Stewie: "Oh, look how gay we are." Brian: "Yeah, we are so gay together." effiminent soldier: "ooh, have room for one more?" Stewie: "Hell Yeah!" brian: *smack*

Oh my ex really does just do that as pretend. No, the part where he and his friend weren't pretending involved being rather touchy feely with each other.

Oh well my bf's friends hate me so I tend not to be around them together.

Yeah just pointing out that not everyone who claims to be straight is a hundred percent straight no exceptions. According to Kinsey, most people are somewhere in the middle to some extent, but not everyone believes that.

I thought I only liked men until I saw naked women other that.. Me.. And I loved having a girlfriend lol.

well back when I had my ex, he didn't seam like a gay or bi guy at all..

People where never surprized by me but when a girl heard this guy "might" be bisexual" she was all..
"OMG really" after all his pretty macho...

But, I got my suspection, first of all for liking me, who already was out in a way that he knew it would make him a homo" for liking me..
and beside that for getting turned on By Dante x Nero hentai and I catch him in reading some of the same yaoi series and having guys from yaoi characters on his computer.

I dont say straight guys cant read/watch yaoi, I just say its pretty rare..
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(LOL after writting this I actually got curious so I stalked my ex facebook..
gender: male: interest: woman and men.... yes.. okay I haven't been wrong all those years..
XD

Haha
Thats kinda funny.