OK  Ladies.....

I have been on hormones for 13 months. At about 6 months I would look in the mirror and see a glimpse of a cute girl. The more I looked, the more the "cute girl" would fade. At 13 months I look in the mirror and see a cute girl. It lasts much longer, but after a time I look again and I see my old self(The ugly boy)! My therapist told me that a Trans girl is like an anorexic. An anorexic see's a fat person and a trans person see's the "Ugliness", but its not "real" changes the hormones have made.

Has anyone experienced anything similar? Other that the "mirror" thing, my body is "developing" as expected. My skin is soft as a babies butt and my boobs are at least an A cup +!

Just for INFO, I started transition at 41.  I know it varies, but I feel as though I'm losing my mind!

I have experienced the following:

Young children(under 10 years) with confused looks.
People I know(And don't) doing "double takes".
Friends saying I have changed and can only describe it as looking "fair"/cute.
I've had family friends almost fall off a chair mumbaling "That I look like my mother reincarnated"!
I have all kinds of "looks" from people that indicate I look, at a minimum, "different"!


Any thoughts or info would be "sobering"!

Thanx

Dani

First of all, we are our own worst critics.  We never really see the changes.  Looking back at old photos can help, the changes can be easily seen.

I went through a period were I was down on myself, because of the things I saw that were not changing.  Facial hair, lack of boobage and hips.  And then it hit me.  "Janet, what if you were born female and still had these problems?"

That was when I realized that I was changing and could accept me for me.

Dani, you knew your male self for a long time.  You are still going to see "him."  But it is a good sign that you are seeing "you" first.

Yep. I still have a lot of self-perception issues and I'm full time and don't really ever get misgendered. It does get steadily better over time though.

I see my old self when I look in the mirror when others say they only see my brother in my old photos. You're the one that's had to look at yourself in the mirror every single day for 40ish years, of course you're gonna see the old you in there.

What makes me feel better is knowing that I can see an former male in about 30% of cis gendered women too

Thanks for the advice ladies. I guess I will just have to get used to it.

Be grateful for small mercies - I look into the mirror these days and I'm starting to see my mum .

Seriously, though - our mind is pretty much always a couple of years behind the reality of us, so it takes time to absorb change, especially when it's gradual. Take heart.

Quote from: Padma on August 15, 2012, 02:54:19 AM
Be grateful for small mercies - I look into the mirror these days and I'm starting to see my mum .

Yeah.... me too. Anybody who has seen me only after transition says I look just like my mom. It's weird because before,  we looked nothing alike. I looked EXACTLY like my dad when he was my age pre hrt... weird huh?

Also weird... people say I look a lot like my half sister too... my sister on my dads side! lol

As others have said we are our worse critics.

I took my wife to a shopping centre in her wheel chair. A mutual friend saw us and told my mother in law that they had seen (my wife) at the shopping centre being taken around by a woman she didn't recognise (me).

I look in the mirror and see a mistake.

Other people see me and refer to me with female pronouns without hesitation.

Hang in there doll.

Cindy

  Thanks again for your replies & wisdom! I suppose I have the fear many of us have. That I will never pass! I will keep up with the patience and hopefully I'll eventually see the changes. I'm kinda shocked that things happen as they due. I mean, I wonder why nobody says a word. They stare, they sometimes have that "uncomfortable feeling" smile! But not single person has said..... Hey Scott, whats going on with you? You look  so different, ect. The one thing I can say is that I have changed to a degree that, I would think, would cause at least some of my coworkers to ask something?

And I have gotten that "You look like your mother thing". The family friend almost fell off the couch. Weird thing is my Dad didn't see it and thought the guy was crazy!

Anywho....
 
Dani

I believe that HRT changes us in a way that unmasks our female side if we would just been born female bodied. So what you see is your female self as it would have been. You are use to 41 years of your male self and you gotta get that familiar image out of your brain are start seeing your true female self. It's hard I know! But you gotta know that's you have to except you and the way you look. Start looking at it in a positive way everytime you look at your self a tell your self I'm a cute girl... The power of suggestion in your mind will take over and you will start seeing you... The female version of you... And forget the male version of you....

Thanx again for the support ladies. I suppose,  in addition to your ideas/comments, I should look at it as though the time frame gets longer and longer. I mean, at 6 months I only would get a glimpse of that "other person/face". At 11 months I'm getting it and its %40/60 Seeing the changes verse's the old me. I can only hope as time goes by, I will see %100 Dani and no Scott.

Later...

Dani

Man in the mirror who 'made that change' 

let others be the mirror...take a step back....let the hairstylist choose your style (within reason) make it a occasional thing mirror glancing.

look at photos with others in it and the backdrop changes everything. look at what you were doing,where you were...totally different to the ''wall of i havent changed'' behind me in the bathroom.

If your still shavcing do it in the shower and go over twice the opposite direction as well to cover then you can avoid the mirror


Kristyn