Quote from: Edina on April 15, 2017, 06:34:43 AM
People hated the queen because she was a cruel and vengeful murderer, not because she thought she was pretty.
In Australia we call it tall poppy syndrome. The flower that stand above the rest is the first to be cut down. It's not limited to beauty, it could be intelligence, or athletic ability, or any other trait or talent the society deems desirable. For some people, the only way to make themselves feel better is to make someone else feel bad. It is not a reflection of the hated, but of the hater.
We live in a strange world, we claim we want to encourage self worth, yet when someone does break through the chains of of self doubt and accepts themselves as skilled and beautiful, the first thing we want to do is drag them back in to the mud again.
Stand tall, stand proud, stay strong. Don't let the haters bring you down!
Hi Edina, Accurate comments you give. I've been to many countries although Australia is not one of them. But Australians I've known have mentioned this expression "Tall Poppy Syndrome" to me and what it means. This is so very true -- and I agree with you that it frequently applies to many different skills or characteristics that a society in general usually finds desirable or socially attractive. You mention intelligence and athletic ability along with beauty which is accurate. Those are certainly 3 of the major ones. Others might include social skills or number of friends, jealousy of one's attractive romantic or sexual partner on the part of others, and ethnic characteristics. Jealousy of these and other things frequently lead to resentment on the part of the jealous person.
I'm not particularly religious in any religion, but my understanding of one of the Christian Ten Commandments is "Thou shalt not covet" which is how this is often translated into English. I could be incorrect, but my partial interpretation of this phrase is that this in part refers to it as being against this Commandment to covet -- or to be jealous of -- the possessions (money or things), skills, abilities, beauty, spouse, or other desirable attributes of other people.
Your point about some people not having any better way to feel good about themselves except primarily by putting down, denegrating, or bullying others is spot-on correct.
In primary / elementary school I was frequently bullied by some other kids for my outstanding academic achievements I had at that age. Horrible ongoing emotional experience for me at that time.
As trans people most of us are bullied for being trans at one point or another, but in addition many trans people are bullied by other people -- the bullies against me have been both cis (non-trans) people as well as trans people. To learn how to emotionally defend myself has been quite a learning curve for me.
You are very correct that much of the world is hypocritical in encouraging others to seek things like beauty, intelligence, self-confidence, social popularity, money, and so on -- and then when a person becomes beautiful, intelligent, self-confident, popular, rich, and so on, to then viciously bully and denigrate that person who has successfully attained any of these attributes that is generally considered socially desirable.
Examples: Beauty is often denigrated as undue attention to one's physical appearance. Um, needless to say, I strongly reject this inaccurate contention. A person -- and this usually applies much more to female than males -- has every moral right to be just as beautiful as she can be and/or wants to be.
Wealth is denigrated. Frequently intelligence is denigrated by people who resent that desirable attribute -- example -- the bullying against me in primary school because of my intelligence and high academic achievement. This can also frequently be seen by resentment against the intelligence demonstrated by scientific achievements and discoveries as being falsely called "fake news" by some people even though the science is backed by clinically-proven academic studies. I've observed that we trans ladies are frequently the victims of this particular type of anti-intelligence bullying and resentment -- which flies in the face of current medical science -- yet many anti-trans haters hate us by falsely claiming "trans ladies are really men" -- contrary to nearly all current medical science -- the bullies and haters simply frequently call such valid science "fake news" which is of course pure rubbish, duh. But such warped opinions often results in drastically draconian legislation and policies against trans people.
Edina, you are absolutely correct about standing tall and stay proud and strong in the face of jealous and hatred and bullying.
My feeling and observation is that famous beautiful actresses and singers likely quickly develop to ability to emotionally deflect any influence that jealous haters try to unload on their lives via jealous hatred and bullying -- so that they can maintain happiness in their lives. I've found this to be a skill that I've had to work on gradually -- the ability to emotionally handle jealous haters due to my beauty, intelligence, or other attributes. About wealth that's been a non-issue since I don't have much money.
I'd say "Go for it, Girl ! " to any women who can achieve stunning beauty, intelligence, wealth, or social popularity. One only lives once -- may as well live one's life to the fullest and seek maximum happiness. Also it's really nice to try and help others maximize their happiness, too.
Jennifer xx
