Thank you Kathy and Kirsten:
This is the first day after starting last night. I know its to early to feel the actual impact of the medications but I definitely feel the emotion.
I left the doctors office yesterday and mentally pushed myself to open the pill box. I took the pill right there on the street. It had an immediate emotional impact. I was finally doing it! There was a very personal sense of elation as I walked to the train to go home.
I have to admit that later I had a very guilty feeling of excitement when I applied the patch. I kept touching it to feel the realness of my decision.
I also feel the relief that I can still change my mind, hence starting the journal. I need to know that I am benefiting from this. I want to make sure that this is worth any further steps I may take and the damage I know I will be causing in my life, to get there.
Kirsten I will add "buzz" to the things I track.
I don't want to make this the endless thread from hell if this is not the way this website operates but I am willing to keep posting on this thread if it is of any benefit to the group.
Please let me know what I should do.
Massive Hug,
Emma