Anxious and Lost

[Alissshaa]

Recently i have been feeling anxious and lost as when ever i see a female i feel like i want to have a body like her. Sometimes i feel so uncomfortable with my body that i just want to get rid of my body. I want to wear all kind of feminine clothes but couldn't.
There is this feeling of being stuck and i just want to get out of here away from everything, do whatever i want to do. I don't know how to process all these thoughts and feeling. I want to know what is happening me but unable to do so. I know i need help but i don't know where go to ask for help.
These things have been on my mind and making myself unable to do normal everyday task.

[KathyLauren]

Hi, @Alissshaa. 

I think most of us here can relate to your experience.  That is how most of us felt when we first started out on this journey.

It will definitely help for you to talk to someone about your feelings.  We will listen here on the forum, but we are not professionals.  It would be most helpful if you are able to find a gender therapist to talk to.  They will have the experience to help you decide what your goals are and to plan how to achieve them.  If you have difficulty finding one where you live, I think there are some who will do sessions over the Internet.

[Brooke Renee]

Hello @Alissshaa and welcome to Susan's. 

Girl, we know how you feel, gender Dysphoria can be absolutely unbearable at times. As @KathyLauren said, finding someone to talk to about these feelings can help.  But also, forums like this one will certainly let you know that you are not alone in these feelings. 

GD can make you feel pretty low but always remember you are a valid human being, your gender identity is yours to decide.  You may not (at the moment) be presenting how you feel but none of that changes who you know who you are. 

As for coping with GD, that can be like trying to catch smoke with a fish net but...  the internet can offer some ideas.  Find ways to safely explore your feminine identity is a big one.  Essentially, moments of affirmation can help shorten and soften the GD episodes.  But do not be surprised if once you accept yourself the GD moments come more frequent.  Chances are you are like many of us where you have kept these thoughts and emotions bottled up for many years.  Once you come out to yourself the flood gate will open.  While this IS a good thing, you are going to be at heightened level of emotional turmoil for a while.  In time, that will likely calm down but it is a journey that we all have gone through.

I hope this helps and we look forward to hearing more from you! 


Warmly,

Brooke

 

[Alissshaa]

@KathyLauren
Thank you so much giving me some ideas what i should do next.
I would really love your help in finding a gender therapist who would do session over the internet. it felt good sharing some of it what i felt.
Thank you so much for Listening Sharing your thought regarding my feelings.

[Alissshaa]

Hello @Brooke Renee
Thank you so much for welcoming me to Susan's
And also thank you so much for helping me by sharing your view. It helped me little bit that i am not alone here and there are people who will listen to me. I actual don't know where start and your help would really mean a lot to me.
I hope that i can be more open about myself and ask what i don't know
Thank you so much for writing back.

[Northern Star Girl]

@Alissshaa
Dear Alissshaa:
I am always happy to see new members come to Susan's Place and the Forum.
        A BIG and WARM WELCOME to you.

You will find this place a friendly, safe, and welcome place that you can discuss you life endeavors
with other like-minded members here.

Please review the links at the end of this message, they include information which will help you to
navigate the site and use the available features. 

Once you reach 15 posts you will be able to send and reply to private messages, and post
an Avatar/Profile photo... until then if you have any questions about the Susan's Place site and
the Forum, please feel free to contact me via email at northernstargirl@susans.org

Once again, Welcome to Susan's Place!
Warm Regards,
Danielle [Northern Star Girl]
The Forum Administrator
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Recently i have been feeling anxious and lost as when ever i see a female i feel like i want to have a body like her. Sometimes i feel so uncomfortable with my body that i just want to get rid of my body. I want to wear all kind of feminine clothes but couldn't.
There is this feeling of being stuck and i just want to get out of here away from everything, do whatever i want to do. I don't know how to process all these thoughts and feeling. I want to know what is happening me but unable to do so. I know i need help but i don't know where go to ask for help.
These things have been on my mind and making myself unable to do normal everyday task.

[Northern Star Girl]

@Alissshaa
Dear Alissshaa:
                            One more thing....

So that more members here will be aware of you arrival to Susan's Place and the Forum
please find you way to the  INTRODUCTIONS  sub-forum:
                https://www.susans.org/index.php/board,8.0.html

Warm Regards,
Danielle   [Northern Star Girl]

[LauraE]

As others have shared, what you're feeling is completely normal and in line with how many, if not most of us, felt in the beginning.

Transitioning is a thousand mile journey and every step you take brings you closer to realizing your true self.

You're in the right place. Susan's is a safe space for you.

Laura

[Susan]

Dear Alissshaa,

I understand that you are navigating a deeply challenging period as you explore your feelings and thoughts related to your gender identity. Experiencing a longing for a different body and a desire to wear feminine clothing are common among individuals who may be transgender. While these feelings can be distressing, they are a part of exploring a crucial aspect of your identity, and it's important to remember that you are not alone in this journey.

Seeking a therapist who specializes in gender identity issues is a vital step. A therapist can provide a safe, non-judgmental space for you to process your emotions and thoughts. They can assist in creating a plan to explore and express your gender in ways that are comfortable for you, allowing you to move forward at your own pace.

Simultaneously, I recommend looking for local support groups where you can share your experiences and feelings, just as you are already doing here at Susan's Place. Engaging in these groups can offer you advice and support from others who may be experiencing similar challenges. This interaction can foster a sense of belonging and understanding, enhancing the support you receive here.

Remember, while the situation may feel overwhelming at the moment, with the right support and guidance, you can gain clarity and take steps towards living authentically as your true self. Be patient with yourself and recognize that there are many resources and people ready to offer support. You're taking brave steps on this journey, and that's commendable.

You've got this!

Susan Larson
Founder
Susan's Place Transgender Resources

[Brooke Renee]

Hello @Brooke Renee
I actual don't know where start and your help would really mean a lot to me.

How does that saying go, "a journey of a thousand miles starts with that first step".

But try to remember, this is your journey and you decide the destination.  Everyone's transition is unique, you may find solace in just knowing your true identity or you may dip your toe in HRT or even surgery.  At the end of the day it is your destination to choose.  Certainly some decisions are permanent but others can be altered.

I think a trap most of us have stumbled into is being frustrated by our own progress when we see how quickly and successfully others have transitioned.  Try to be watchful for this!

Hugs,

Brooke

 

[Alissshaa]

@Alissshaa
Dear Alissshaa:
I am always happy to see new members come to Susan's Place and the Forum.
        A BIG and WARM WELCOME to you.

You will find this place a friendly, safe, and welcome place that you can discuss you life endeavors
with other like-minded members here.

Please review the links at the end of this message, they include information which will help you to
navigate the site and use the available features. 

Once you reach 15 posts you will be able to send and reply to private messages, and post
an Avatar/Profile photo... until then if you have any questions about the Susan's Place site and
the Forum, please feel free to contact me via email at northernstargirl@susans.org

Once again, Welcome to Susan's Place!
Warm Regards,
Danielle [Northern Star Girl]
The Forum Administrator
```````````````````````````````````````````````````````````
                    Things that you should read... Look especially at the LINKS in RED

Site Terms of Service & Rules to Live By	Standard Terms & Definitions	Post Ranks (including when you can upload an avatar)	Cautionary Note
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@NorthernStarGirl
Thank you so much for this warm welcome
It really means a lot to me. Even though I just shared a little bit i feel so relieved that there is some place where i can talk about this. This feels like steps toward a good future.
Again thank you so much this warm welcome.

[ChrissyRyan]

Alissshaa,

I was helped by a competent gender therapist and please consider trying one.
A local transgender group may be better able to recommend one or provide you a list of some than your physician but you can ask her or him too.

Women can have very appealing bodies for sure. There is a possible position of appreciating their looks so much that you too wish you had their bodies, instead of being truly transgender.  However, if you did not wish you had a female body you may not be transgender.  This is obviously very personal and seeking clarity with a professional is likely an important step for you. 

I wish you the best.

Chrissy

[ClaireBlooming]

Recently i have been feeling anxious and lost as when ever i see a female i feel like i want to have a body like her. Sometimes i feel so uncomfortable with my body that i just want to get rid of my body. I want to wear all kind of feminine clothes but couldn't.
There is this feeling of being stuck and i just want to get out of here away from everything, do whatever i want to do. I don't know how to process all these thoughts and feeling. I want to know what is happening me but unable to do so. I know i need help but i don't know where go to ask for help.
These things have been on my mind and making myself unable to do normal everyday task.

I can certainly relate with what you are saying.  I too have intense feelings of envy for cis women and trans women who are successfully transitioning.  I used to think it was attraction but really it was envy.  I would highly recommend a gender therapist to help you sort out and clarify your feelings.  I'm working with one now and I love her.

Just wanted you to know you're not alone

Hugs,
Claire

[D'Amalie]

Difinately not alone.  Good therapist is a must where most of us are in our journey.  They'll help you make defining choices, gender fluidity isn't a bad thing.

[she she]

Alissshaa

Do I ever know how you feel !    Ever so often I see a cis female that just sets me off with ENVY and then anger within myself.  I ask myself why can I not look like that and be like that sexy lady I'm noticing?    I then wonder why I'm stuck in the place that I exist in.  My personality will change for a while and my X girlfriend will ask me what is wrong,  I will say it is nothing and give her some excuse.  It takes me a while to shake it off and I go on as usual, but only to have the same effect over and over from time to time and I never know when it will strike.  I have found under dressing helps with the mental anguish,  a life long misery I must edure.

[Rachel]

I agree with what was said already, see a gender therapist and participate in trans group(s). Dysphoria is definitely not the way to live a happy life.

I go to the gym and work out. There are a lot of woman there and I see the same woman all the time. They are muscular and very fit. At work I see many thousands of woman, all in different sizes and shapes. If you transition how you choose to look or what you choose to do or to what extent you transition is totally up to you.

[Jessica_Rose]

Alissshaa

Do I ever know how you feel !    Ever so often I see a cis female that just sets me off with ENVY and then anger within myself.  I ask myself why can I not look like that and be like that sexy lady I'm noticing?    I then wonder why I'm stuck in the place that I exist in.  My personality will change for a while and my X girlfriend will ask me what is wrong,  I will say it is nothing and give her some excuse.  It takes me a while to shake it off and I go on as usual, but only to have the same effect over and over from time to time and I never know when it will strike.  I have found under dressing helps with the mental anguish,  a life long misery I must edure.

She She, welcome to Susan's Place and the Forums!

I noticed this was your first post on the Forums, so I wanted to give you an official welcome. Once you feel comfortable here, please feel free to stop by the Introductions Forum to introduce yourself and very briefly tell more members something about yourself!

Please review the links at the end of this message, they include information which will help you navigate the site and use the available features. 

Once you reach 15 posts you will be able to send and reply to private messages, until then if you have any questions about the Susan's Place site and the Forums, please feel free to contact me via email at Jessica_Rose@susans.org

Once again, Welcome to Susan's Place!

Jessica Rose
Global Moderator

Things that you should read

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