The world according to Sarah

[Stottie Girl]

I know you don't like some of the things I say, but I'm going to direct you back several pages here. I hope that things work as well as you are expecting them to, but I don't necessarily think this is going to be as smooth as you describe above.
 
https://www.susans.org/index.php?msg=2348189

Hugs, Devlyn

I'm not going to click on that link Dev as I don't want more bad news right now! I know you will have posted whatever it was from a place of genuine care and wanting to help though. I do appreciate that, really I do.

I might not always see eye to eye with what you say Dev, but I can see the kindness in you, and most of the time I actually do agree with you (gasp! shocking I know lol!)

I will plod on through it until I hit the next obstacle and if I have to remain on private HRT in the short term then post orchie, the cost for just E is tiny compared to what I am forking out currently.

[tammy753]

I am also wanting an Orchi that is on my list of things but I will probably address that later. Luckily we have informed consent now in the US so we have an easier path to HRT. Keep us posted on the GP.

[Stottie Girl]

I am also wanting an Orchi that is on my list of things but I will probably address that later. Luckily we have informed consent now in the US so we have an easier path to HRT. Keep us posted on the GP.

Thanks Tammy, will do.

[KristaFairchild]

I'm into my 5th week of being stuck in male mode. I feel like I should be chalking the days on the wall!

The only time I can be me is in the bath when I can spend time shaving my legs and pits, applying lotions and moisturisers and generally pampering myself before emerging back into male prison.

I can see my bedroom being finished in a couple of weeks, then I need my kitchen installed or at least some function to it and I can move in. I'm tempted to move in as soon as my bedroom is done and just go round to my folks for meals or eat out. I'm climbing the walls here. My whole life is on hold.

At least I'm not falling into depression like I was before. It is just massively frustrating.

I get it! A trip to the desert in male mode 18 months ago helped launch me toward coming out. 

[Captain.Val]

It's easy to forget how terrible male-mode feels. If we're forced to do it, it reminds us painfully about why we transition. Anyhoo I'd absolutely support your idea of moving in when the bedroom is ready. Living on microwaved food and washing the dishes in the bathroom for a couple of weeks might be an option too, it's certainly less painful than living in that dudeprison.

[Stottie Girl]

Got the carcasses up for my new full height wardrobes. I'm going to put the shelves, rails and lighting in tomorrow, fix the window blind up and I'm ready to order the Bedroom Carpet. I nearly have my sanctuary back! Also need to finish bricking up where I put the new waste pipes in today plus put a new copper pipe run in to the rear garden tap. Then I can start fixing up the Kitchen cabinets but the worktops won't arrive until the 1st September which is a bit disapointing. Once the bedroom is set up and carpets are in I'm tempted to move in finally.

Still none the wiser as to the fluid build up in my legs, it's still there. Had my abdominal ultrasound which found no cause but the report says I may have a porcelain gall bladder, bloody hope not, can't be doing with surgery for that on top of everything else. Will have to wait and see what my GP suggests on the 25th, probably off for a CT scan, lovely😐

[Lori Dee ✅]

Do you suspect the fluid buildup has anything to do with your activity level?

I mean, seriously, Sarah, you have accomplished A LOT!

Does it seem to ease on off days when you are less busy?

Just curious. I hope they figure it out soon. You have moving in to do!

I'm happy about that part.

[Stottie Girl]

Do you suspect the fluid buildup has anything to do with your activity level?

I mean, seriously, Sarah, you have accomplished A LOT!

Does it seem to ease on off days when you are less busy?

Just curious. I hope they figure it out soon. You have moving in to do!

I'm happy about that part.

Thanks Lori.

No, activity doesn't seem to make a difference. Hot weather definitely makes it a lot worse. I was at work this week and it was 30C and I couldn't comfortably get my slip-on trainers on.

The fluid happened after another 30C day when I was also standing on a work platform for about 5 hour stripping a ceiling of woodchip wallpaper. Could have just been co-incidence though. The quacks seem to have their claws in me now though, I'm getting sent all over the place to get scanned poked and prodded. For someone who has pretty much avoided the medical services most of my life it is.......uncomfortable.

Oh and I'm also anaemic but this is likely because I am on a diet.

[Charlotte Kitty ✅]

Sounds like you're making great progress with your house. Shame you're hindered by worktops taking a while.  Always stuff you cant control gets in the way!

Sounds like some worrying thoughts with regards the fluid build up. But honestly it can just happen, almost ideopathically as saw my ex go through this exact process of tests and scans to find nothing and told to wear compression socks! I hope for you they find a cause, but not something too scary.  Out of interest, are you keeping your salt intake low? Salt can cause water retention.

Charlotte ❤️

[Stottie Girl]

Sounds like you're making great progress with your house. Shame you're hindered by worktops taking a while.  Always stuff you cant control gets in the way!

Sounds like some worrying thoughts with regards the fluid build up. But honestly it can just happen, almost ideopathically as saw my ex go through this exact process of tests and scans to find nothing and told to wear compression socks! I hope for you they find a cause, but not something too scary.  Out of interest, are you keeping your salt intake low? Salt can cause water retention.

Charlotte ❤️

Thanks Charlotte.

I'm on a balanced healthy calorie controlled diet, I don't eat processed foods, my salt levels should be fine. It's a mystery! It's more just an irritation really but it shouldn't be happening I suppose.

[Gina P]

Sounds like great progress on your house. Sorry to hear about the fluid buildup. I'm with the others, probably from standing, working to long. Good to let the doctors check it out. Don't want to be calling you peg leg. You could try compression leggings. Though with the heat it would probably be uncomfortable.
 Copper to the outside faucet? Crazy how expensive that stuff has become!

[Stottie Girl]

Sounds like great progress on your house. Sorry to hear about the fluid buildup. I'm with the others, probably from standing, working to long. Good to let the doctors check it out. Don't want to be calling you peg leg. You could try compression leggings. Though with the heat it would probably be uncomfortable.
 Copper to the outside faucet? Crazy how expensive that stuff has become!

Thanks Gina.

Yeah, it's not all that cheap you can get paid for the old stuff from the scrap men though. I had a bundle of 1/2" copper lying around so just used that. Looks nicer than plastic when properly soldered and polished.

[Stottie Girl]

I have just passed 8 weeks since I packed my true female life up into boxes. I'm still at least 2-3 weeeks away from escaping. If I had known it would take this long I would not have bought the place! I'm currently fitting the doors to my new wardrobes. I need to order the carpet and then the bedroom is finally complete. I'm ready to start fitting the kitchen cabinets now and I'll be off work for nearly a fortnight at the end of this week so I should be able to make rapid progress. Once I have a bedroom and a kitchen I can move in and the ordeal will be over! Unfortunately the worktops won't arrive until the 1st September so I'm thinking w/c 7th September will be my moving in date. 11 weeks! Jeez, I have never gone that long without being able to slip into girl mode at least once a week probably since I left home at 19 years old. Depressing stuff, I wouldn't recommend it!

[tammy753]

WOW you are moving fast. Remember to take care of your self that much time on your feet can not be helping the edema.

[Finally Anna]

Unfortunately the worktops won't arrive until the 1st September so I'm thinking w/c 7th September will be my moving in date.

Get a cheap temporary worktop and just lay it on top of the base cabinets. A standard side for a wardrobe or a scrap plywood sheet from the lumberyard.

[Stottie Girl]

WOW you are moving fast. Remember to take care of your self that much time on your feet can not be helping the edema.

Fast? it feels like it is taking forever!! Thanks for the concern though. It actually has improved a little bit since I started taking water tablets.

[Stottie Girl]

Get a cheap temporary worktop and just lay it on top of the base cabinets. A standard side for a wardrobe or a scrap plywood sheet from the lumberyard.

Yeah, I've got a length of OSB I'm going to stick on there temporarily but there's no sink or cooker. I can hook up the air fryer, kettle and microwave though. I might get there sooner but I really want the kitchen sink in before I move in. It's a nightmare without one.

[Charlotte Kitty ✅]

Awwww Sarah, so gutted its taking longer and that you're feeling so down not being able to be your true self. But those two weeks off...you'll make huge progress. Right now this is kinda living hell, but like all tough chapters, in a few months time it'll just be a story of your perseverance and all the pain just history.

You can make do if you really can't wait! I attached my sink to a rough timber frame once as only had weekends, so all week had to leave unfinished. I was using my old bath whilst walking over open floorboards and a part installed shower beside it. Not pretty but can muddle if you need to and are creative with planning.


Sending huggs 🩷🧡

[KristaFairchild]

I think of you often in this challenging situation. Of course I go into "fix" mode but you've explored all the options. I can recall when I could only dress up on work trips because I had a hotel room to myself. What a relief. 

I'm glad you can see the finish line, Sarah! 

[Stottie Girl]

Well I've had my first set of bloods back and there is nothing jumping out that could explain the persistant fluid in my legs as best as I can tell. I have a suspicion I may have an underactive Thyroid but I should find out by Tuesday next week I hope. I have a lot of the symptoms of an underactive thyroid, not least the fact that I have been on a calorie diet of only 1200-1400 calories daily and I have lost the grand total of 3 lbs over two months. My mum has it plus 2 of her sisters, the other sister and my maternal grandmother had overactive thyroids. On my Dads side my paternal grandmother had it as did two of his sisters. There is a strong genetic link to it and it would explain a lot of the things I have going on.

I don't like not knowing what it is. Tuesday will hopefully shed more light on what's wrong and also what they are likely to do about my gall bladder issue.

On a positive, shiny note, I've finished my new wardrobes and am just needing to order the carpet and my bedroom will be complete. I'll start fitting out the kitchen this weekend. It's starting to come together.