(Quick clarification: This is NOT in reference to this website. This is a support website, and I come here specifically to support people.)
I love helping people, it's one of the things I enjoy the most. Which is why this is a deep conflict to me.
I want to move on with my life. Sure it was a mistake that I was originally born male, but I've gone through great lengths to remedy that. I don't want to be reminded of it by hearing about your problems everywhere I go. I have trans-friends bombarding me one way or another with their issues. Facebook, text messages, visiting them in person, their trans-issues are all they talk about.
Okay fine, I understand you're new/struggling in your transition, but please stop bombarding me with your problems, I have my own. The few people that I do REALLY care to help don't reach out for support and even reject it when I offer a helping hand which frustrates me.
The people who bombard you are the people who move way to fast through their transition. They're racing along trying to get to the finish line as quickly as possible, but they don't take into account that there are bumps in the road, and when your racing as fast as you can those bumps become exaggerated and you become damaged and even crash. It takes more time to undo all of the damage than it would if you just took your time on your transition.
When I want to support someone, I go to my local transgroup and I go to these forums. But aside from those 2 things, I really want nothing to do with the issue. It's draining me, physically and mentally. It was bad enough that I dealt with it covertly for 23 years, but it's even worse to be reminded of all of these hardships after I've made efforts to move past them.
You're car broke down? Wow sorry to hear that, tell me more, maybe I can help.
You like sports (eww), and your favorite team lost? Oh, bummer, tell me about the game!
You want to talk about how when you were a child, you used to wear girl's clothes and give me your life story? No, I'd rather not.
Sure it's a lot of big changes that are hard to deal with, but you need to understand that I also dealt with those myself and not too long ago. They were just as stressful on me as they are to you, and being reminded of them puts even more stress on me. It's hard to move forward that way.
So I'm debating whether or not to put some distance between myself and my various trans-friends. I already took around 50 people off of my Facebook friend's list.
