confussed

[tammygirl2]

First of all i want to apologize for not coming on here very often i missed this place but iv been in between moving house ,getting back online & on top of that i am really confussed right now.

I keep having these feelings that i want to become a woman and there have been times i have just tried to ingore these feelings but they just keep coming back.

I did take action a while ago by doing to the doctors and getting a referal but then i did not hear anything back from my gp and i know these things can take time but now i have moved house and changed gp i might have to tell them how i feel if it is not on my medical records.

I have a appointment tomorrow at my new doctors its the first appointment as a newly registered patient so they give you 20 mins to tell them stuff so i am 80% sure that i am going to tell them how i am feeling.

2 years ago i thought to myself that even if i wanted a sex change etc i could not because there would be so many things i would have to change in my life i just thought i could not do it but things have changed now and life is different and the only steps i need to take now is get a job and get a place of my own so i can live full time as a woman. I think by doing that i can find out if its just a phase or not and if its really what i want.

If someone asked me right now what i want i would say that i want to be a woman and have a sex change and live the rest of my life as my chosen gender but i dont know if somewhere down the line i would change my mind or not.

I have wanted to have the op for about 2 years now.

my mum knows that i want to be a woman and she did not over react but she did say it would be a shame if i was to become a woman.

Some time soon i have got to try and talk to my dad about how i am feeling.
My dad once said to me that no matter what happens he would not get angry at me or no matter what i tell him he wouldnt be shocked but saying that about a month ago he walked in my room and saw one of my feminine things and all he did was stare at it he had a blank look on his face and he did not say anything and he never has said anything about it. maybe he is waiting for me to say something or maybe i am just reading in to it.

[Jillieann Rose]

Hi Tammygirl,
Glad to hear from you again.
Yes do tell you GP and hopefully you can get that referral you need.
Don't stay away so long. Keep posting girl.

Jillieann

[tammygirl2]

I will i missed you guys. Will let you know how i get on tomorrow and i wont stay away so long.

[Kimberly]

*smile* *Hug*

[Nigella]

Hi Tammygirl,

Hope it goes well for you. If it helps I'm still confused, lol.


hugs

Nigella

[tammygirl2]

*hugs*

Well i ent to see my new doctor for the very first time about my anxiety and i was also going to tell him about my gender issues but i could not tell him.
I find it harder to tell guys how i feel then i do gals. I have to go back to the doctors in 2 weeks time for a followup of my anxiety so i will tell him then.

I think i am making progress with my feminine side even thought its with small things like these past 4 days i have stopped wearing my mens underware and changed to womans and i plan to wear womans underware full time which i found hard before i always worried incase someone would notice that i got them on but i  dont now. I was in a very public place today in a shopping centre and no one noticed not even my mum so i feel a lot more confident then i did.

I also wear nail varnish & i started to shave under my arms & wearing feminine deodorant and in my spare time when i am at home i wear perfume.

my goal is to go out dressed all fem soon but i just want to build my confidence up first.

Also a lady noticed that i had a girls braclet on today but i did not get embarresed like i used too so i think i am getting there even though it is in small steps.