Belgian discovers his wife used to be a man after 19 years

[Kevin Peña]

And he also wouldnt mind if i got SRS(would never)
But he said if i was post op and the whole time we were together i never told him of my past and he had to find out he said he would kick my ass.

So a punch is nothing for her.
Its the least she deserves lolol.

According to who? That inconsiderate brute? Frankly, anyone who immediately jumps to an unprovoked and undeserved act of violence doesn't have a leg to stand on when calling someone else a bad person.

[=celestica=]

According to who? That inconsiderate brute? Frankly, anyone who immediately jumps to an unprovoked and undeserved act of violence doesn't have a leg to stand on when calling someone else a bad person.

his whole marriage was basically a lie.
It didnt exist to him, because he didnt even marry the woman he thought he did.
Its gross to find out crap like that.

So he was provoked.

[Kevin Peña]

For those of you that believe that violence was a good solution to this problem, let me ask you one thing: were there not other, more sensible solutions? Being "gross" is not a valid reason for someone to get hit.

As for 19 years of his life being a lie, I just have to say that gender doesn't make a person. He never complained about his wife's body before and even had sex with her. Using his wife's trans status was a pathetic excuse.

[=celestica=]

For those of you that believe that violence was a good solution to this problem, let me ask you one thing: were there not other, more sensible solutions? Being "gross" is not a valid reason for someone to get hit.

As for 19 years of his life being a lie, I just have to say that gender doesn't make a person. He never complained about his wife's body before and even had sex with her. Using his wife's trans status was a pathetic excuse.

Hi.
We're living on planet Earth.
The birth sex of your partner of 19 years is *kind of* a big deal, k?

Doesnt nmatter how pretty or how passable you are.
If you want, you can fly to mars or somthing and start a civilization where literally nothing matters, over there.
Over here, thats just how stuff goes

shes lucky she was just hit.
A beating would be the least of her worries.

[~RoadToTrista~]

were there not other, more sensible solutions?

I'm sure there were. People are rarely sensible when they're pissed off.

As for 19 years of his life being a lie, I just have to say that gender doesn't make a person. He never complained about his wife's body before and even had sex with her.

I'm sure what he feels now is that she was a man who was tricking him by wearing a woman suit for 19 years. Look at it from his ignorant perception.

[silly by the seashore]

For those of you that believe that violence was a good solution to this problem, let me ask you one thing: were there not other, more sensible solutions? Being "gross" is not a valid reason for someone to get hit.

As for 19 years of his life being a lie, I just have to say that gender doesn't make a person. He never complained about his wife's body before and even had sex with her. Using his wife's trans status was a pathetic excuse.

Gender is a huge part of a person for most people in romantic relationships.

And true, the violence isn't excused by no means, but come on, I think we all know the potential for it is there upon discovery that one's spouse or lover was actually born a different sex than the one they are now. There are too many incidences of it for anyone to take a risk like that and then get surprised when it does happen.  We do have to take a little responsibility to try to avoid putting ourselves and others in that sort of situation and while his response was not appropriate, especially to us, it was appropriate in a lot of other people's eyes.  Its just simply a reality we have to deal with and try to avoid because its not going to change anytime soon.

[Kevin Peña]

No honey; He loved and never complained about who he thought he was with.
But he wasn't able to complain or judge the truth because he didn't know it.

Hiding something serious like that for 19 years is a valid enough reason.

A punch was nothing. Nothing.
Don't waste peoples time like that. 19 years? Hell no.

People need to learn respect.
If a dude/chick doesn't want to have sex with someone trans he/she has every damn right too,
And that choice should be respected.

Well, suggesting that everything about her was a lie and that her gender can make the difference between real and illusion is a bit shallow. You can feel free to disagree with the importance of gender in a relationship, but advocating violence isn't cool.

PS--> Jayr, if you feel as though I'm wasting your time, remember that you don't have to reply.

I'm sure there were. People are rarely sensible when they're pissed off.

I'm sure what he feels now is that she was a man who was tricking him by wearing a woman suit for 19 years. Look at it from his ignorant perception.

Gender is a huge part of a person for most people in romantic relationships.

And true, the violence isn't excused by no means, but come on, I think we all know the potential for it is there upon discovery that one's spouse or lover was actually born a different sex than the one they are now. There are too many incidences of it for anyone to take a risk like that and then get surprised when it does happen.  We do have to take a little responsibility to try to avoid putting ourselves and others in that sort of situation and while his response was not appropriate, especially to us, it was appropriate in a lot of other people's eyes.  Its just simply a reality we have to deal with and try to avoid because its not going to change anytime soon.

To clarify, everybody, I must make clear the fact that I'm not an idiot; I understand the reality of the situation. I know that there are less-than-ideal people in the world. I'm just asking for you to acknowledge that he was in the wrong for doing what he did. For those of you who did, I thank you. For those of you that didn't, I ask you to reconsider.

[pretty pauline]

I just have to say that gender doesn't make a person. He never complained about his wife's body before and even had sex with her. Using his wife's trans status was a pathetic excuse.

Thank you, thats what I ment when I said he was using the trans issue as an excuse, you explained it better.

As most of you already know, my Fiancé didn't know my history, but when we got engaged I did tell him my history, he is now my Husband, he never complained or questioned my femininity or womanhood.
That guy isn't ether, but when everything else went wrong, he blames her for not disclosing her history, when it was all the other crazy stuff that caused the relationship to break down, thats my last word, we'll agree to disagree.
Pauline