I feel people should handle their own relationships however they feel is best, and when, why and to whom they tell somebody that, in the distant past, they had to pretend to be male should be their own business. That seems pretty simple.
Just because a lot of present day society wants to tell us we used to be men doesn't make it true. Our consciousnesses are tied to our minds, not to the bodies we were born with, not to how we were raised, or to how we made ourselves act in the past out of fear. We are our minds and our minds were born female. Even science is bearing that out. It is never a lie to say otherwise, unless when you were in the male role it wasn't an act, I guess.
As long as society is going to see women with our history as "previously men," when we reveal those little, almost always unnecessary, details about our past that cause them think of us that way, we have corrupted the truth. Doing so causes them think of us, and treat us, as though we are (or were) something we never could be. The truth is we have always been female, the lie is that we ever were men.
I'm not saying you should never tell anybody. I personally would not be with a man that couldn't handle knowing about my past. I'm just saying that, in my opinion, it should be up to you when and whether you do, and that you should never feel guilty for not doing so.
Regarding the original subject, act like a woman, be a woman, and people will treat you as such. For reals.
