I've dealt with feeling cross gendered for a very long time and have come to terms with it for myself pretty well-- though I'm always tinkering with things. It's a lot more challenging to realize you can't take an off-the-shelf lifestyle and be just a man or a woman or even a transgender women (as many on this forum are). You have to be creative and create your own way to be-- but ultimately, it will be more satisfying if that's who you are.
While I'm not an expert on the subject, I'm pretty sure that if you do not feel 100% female, it would not be a good idea to go on HRT or have SRS surgery. In fact, I don't think any ethical therapist or doctor would provide you with these unless a qualified therapist has assessed that this is the case.
There are plenty of people living gender liquid lifestyles, and while it will always have it's difficulties, if it's who you are you'll find a way to make it work for you. Society has certain unspoken (and sometimes spoken) rules about being one gender or the other and I've always found life easier to come across as distinctly one or the other, for sure. Certainly with jobs and social situations it's best to present with some consistency. I've found, though, that it helps to present oneself as more androgynous most of the time because this makes people more understanding of your situation. I like to say I'd rather have people say "is that a man or a woman" than "look at that man dressed as a woman".
I'm probably not the best role model for this since I work at home and don't have terribly active social life. Our wonderful friend Barbie on this forum is a great example of someone living a fairly public androgynous life, though. She's genetic male who is married with children and a university scholar who presents publicly (and beautifully, I might say) as primarily female, but generally androgynous. Do a web search of modeling superstar Andrej Pejic (my current fav fashion star) to learn about a very publicly successful androgynous lifestyle.
~ Lyric ~
