Partial rant/vent coming up.
I was watching Dr. Phil (there's nothing else on!) and there was this girl who hadn't seen her father for almost 20 or something. Awfully similar to my situation and all that jazz.
Funny thing is how indifferent I feel about it. It's like I don't give a rat's ass that I don't have someone to call dad. Sure, mom is married and now for the first time in my life I have an official stepdad but I call him that just because it's easier. IRL I mostly call him by his first name. He's really cool guy and all but I can't even imagine calling him my dad because I'm used to not having one and frankly I have never needed one.
The only men in my life have been my grandfather (obviously from mom's side) and my godfather (used to be my aunt's husband) and I still managed to develope a male gender identity. I guess that's some sort of an achievement.
I did reach out to my biological father when I was 14-15. I met him few times. I got ONE birthday card from him.
He never reached out to me because he's most likely playing happy times with his new family.
So screw him. I don't need a douchebag who disappears like a fart in Sahara and leaves just a note on the table when there's a baby coming.
As far as I'm concerned, he could run into the ocean while wearing cement shoes. The only time I'll be interested in his dealings, is when he's dead and I'm LEGALLY entitled to inherit something from him.
Pfft, mom and I did just fine. I guess that's the reason why we have such an amazing relationship despite all of my trans stuff.