What are you thinking? 7.0

[Shantel]

Wondering why my butt is sore...

Been naughty? 

[King Malachite]

Thinking about the possibility of going on a hormones (Androgel), but I got to find a trans-friendly endocrinologist.  There are none in my area and the closest one is like 107 miles away.  The taxi trips are going to be super expensive, on top of the super expensive hormones.  If I went that route then I'd never be able to pay for top surgery.  That will have to wait I suppose. -sigh-  I really wish I was in an area with a lot more resources for us.

[MadeleineG]

Thinking about the possibility of going on a hormones (Androgel), but I got to find a trans-friendly endocrinologist.  There are none in my area and the closest one is like 107 miles away.  The taxi trips are going to be super expensive, on top of the super expensive hormones.  If I went that route then I'd never be able to pay for top surgery.  That will have to wait I suppose. -sigh-  I really wish I was in an area with a lot more resources for us.

no bus system?

[King Malachite]

no bus system?

none that runs that far-public transporation down here is absolute crap

[Emo]

Been naughty? 

Lol. No... And ew..

[Adam (birkin)]

I'm kind of in an ethical pickle.

I need to save for surgery and the chances of getting a job right now that will give me time off for two surgeries are pretty slim. My parents seem to be under the impression that I will be living with them for a period of time after my Master's is done this summer...and they're fine with that. I pay them $400 a month and I'm quiet, fairly clean, etc. I'll also have jobs, but likely will end up switching between jobs when I have my surgeries done.

But I feel like, man, I'm a loser. I'm almost 25, I shouldn't be living at home. I'm fully capable of supporting myself and there's nothing I hate more than freeloaders.

[Adam (birkin)]

That being said, if all goes according to plan, after my surgeries I'll be saving up for a car, a small nest egg, and then be moving to the US. Lol. Sooo. At that point I definitely won't feel like a freeloader.

[Miss_Bungle1991]

If you're paying to live there, and they don't have any problems with it, then you're not a freeloader.

Indeed. Not when you are paying them frickin' $400 a month.

[King Malachite]

I agree with the other two, Caleb.  You're definately not a freeloader!  If anything I'm the freeloader.  Right now, I don't pay rent and most things are brought for me so you shouldn't be too hard on yourself.  However, give me your pass to move up to Canada when you move down here.   

[Adam (birkin)]

Thanks guys. I think it's just hard for me because I've always had this really strong aversion to relying on anyone for anything. So this has been a sore spot for me for years...I know I'm finishing up school and all but I really just want to feel like I'm pulling 100% of my weight. I felt (feel) the same way having credit card debt, even just a little. I hope that soon I get calls back from the jobs I applied to.

[MadeleineG]

But I feel like, man, I'm a loser. I'm almost 25, I shouldn't be living at home. I'm fully capable of supporting myself and there's nothing I hate more than freeloaders.

That doesn't sound like freeloading. It sounds like an efficient, mutually-beneficial financial arrangement.

[JRD]

I lived with my dad from 95(age 32) until 08(age 45) when he passed away. He wanted me around, I helped him out and at times he helped me out. I didn't feel like a freeloader and no one ever accused me of being one. I was just amazed that he still wanted me around even when I transitioned.

[~RoadToTrista~]

Oh snap you know that Law & Order SVU episode about the shelter for gay teens? I just realised Laverne Cox was the transwoman. o.O And she was buff back then lolz

[Keaira]

Wow!!!

LOL. Thank you.

Here, have a bigger version:

[Adam (birkin)]

That doesn't sound like freeloading. It sounds like an efficient, mutually-beneficial financial arrangement.

True...well, my mom has always been the hardest on me, so that may be where it comes from. Like nothing is ever good enough and sometimes she makes little comments about how I pay her next to nothing. Yet if my brother, who currently makes more money because he isn't a student, gives her $400 it's just a great amount of money. -_-

I lived with my dad from 95(age 32) until 08(age 45) when he passed away. He wanted me around, I helped him out and at times he helped me out. I didn't feel like a freeloader and no one ever accused me of being one. I was just amazed that he still wanted me around even when I transitioned.

I don't know if my parents want me around or not. My dad doesn't seem to mind me being around, it's my mom I'm uncertain about. But like I said, sometimes she is critical just for the sake of being critical. And only of me! Surprise Surprise.

LOL. Thank you.

Here, have a bigger version:

Hubba hubba!

[King Malachite]

Thinking about the possibility of going on a hormones (Androgel), but I got to find a trans-friendly endocrinologist.  There are none in my area and the closest one is like 107 miles away.  The taxi trips are going to be super expensive, on top of the super expensive hormones.  If I went that route then I'd never be able to pay for top surgery.  That will have to wait I suppose. -sigh-  I really wish I was in an area with a lot more resources for us.

So I found a Planned Parenthood in NC, but that's about 93 miles away from me.  Gosh I may just have to suck it up and make the drive down there whenever I get my license because I couldn't afford to pay for going there on a taxi every time AND top surgery. I don't trust myself to go that far though: 1 because I'm a horrible driver and 2 because I'm bad with direction, even with a GPS.  Unless I move closer to there, I'm going to have to make that drive.  If I happen to die in a car crash oh well.  Be a man or die trying.  At least I would have tried.  I will just look at the positive side to this: at least I will never have to worry about transitioning anymore.  I just hope I don't take anyone out in the process and I hope when I crash, it will just be an instant kill. 

[Emo]

I dont want to be me.

[Adam (birkin)]

So I found a Planned Parenthood in NC, but that's about 93 miles away from me.  Gosh I may just have to suck it up and make the drive down there whenever I get my license because I couldn't afford to pay for going there on a taxi every time AND top surgery. I don't trust myself to go that far though: 1 because I'm a horrible driver and 2 because I'm bad with direction, even with a GPS.  Unless I move closer to there, I'm going to have to make that drive.  If I happen to die in a car crash oh well.  Be a man or die trying.  At least I would have tried.  I will just look at the positive side to this: at least I will never have to worry about transitioning anymore.  I just hope I don't take anyone out in the process and I hope when I crash, it will just be an instant kill.

You're not allowed to die on me Mister. I can't comment on the driving part as I don't have my license yet (still need to take classes and no cash), but I think with more practice you will feel more confident.

[TheLance]

I'm thinkin' things are FINALLY starting to move forward in my life. Got a job, been workin' out regularly, got somebody I'm genuinely into, got my best friend...I'm goooood. YES.

[LordKAT]

 Keaira, Love the bigger photo.

Malachite, I think you should go for the androgel. It may make the wait until top surgery less stressful and give you a reason to practice driving. Your death isn't allowed so drive careful.

Caleb, if you are paying for your living space, your not freeloading. It is more than it cost me to rent a room, double it even.